My Autopsy Results Came Back Negative There Was Nothing In There

I worked at a bakery when some girl came in and ordered a plain black coffee. The coffee at this particular bakery was just about boiling, so I warned her not to drink it right away. She went, “Oh, really?’ and chugged the whole thing while sliding me another fiver. I handed her another coffee and said the same thing as before, but this time she straight up ATE it, paper cup and all.

more harrier du bois moodboard

i think the worst people are high-ups in companies who refer to their employees as “investments”

like sir that is a person

This person clearly doesn’t belong here. From Ask Historians on Reddit.

I don’t have a lot of ambitions in life but one thing on my bucket list is to marry a cactus

like

I have no intention of getting for real married to anyone, and I really love the desert, so for the last couple years I’ve just been obsessed by the idea of going out into the Arizona desert and doing wedding photos with a saguaro

I’ve done my research on cactus law and cactus safety. I do not intend to touch the cactus. I merely wish to stand by the cactus or photoshop myself near the cactus in a way that heavily implies the cactus to be my spiky green gay husband, so I can hang it in a discreet area of my home and stare at wistfully whenever a guest or family member or whatever talks about settling down. Something I can keep in my wallet at work that I can whip out when people ask about the ring on my finger

Again, I have done the planning. There is a wedding dress in my closet. I have a Pinterest board for this. I have spoken with a potential photographer. I just need to get to Arizona

hey are you a furry? i just want to make sure before i interact you bc furrys make me uncomfy and i rather not subject myself to that trauma :((

im not a furry but i dont have any issues with the furry community theyre pretty chill

this is real

remembering the time i ate an entire loaf of pumpkin bread and my mom got so enraged she called me a “little loaf eating freak”

classic