and is your shame helpful? is it inspiring goodness and change? or is it keeping you frozen in time unable to move on and be everything you have expanded to be?
@tinybuddha
a lot of the people you guys are calling narcissists could easily be replaced with the word “asshole”
I think the hot new trends for this summer should be reading comprehension and critical thinking skills
Hey you know that thing you're good at? That thing you think makes you valuable? The way you are, or the thing you do, etc?
You can be and deserve to be and will be loved and cherished even without it.
You're not worthwhile because you help, or you are good at making your art, or your skills at your job. You're worthwhile inherently, as a person, even without all that.
And I want you to internalize that because otherwise there might come a day where you can't do The Thing You Think Makes You Valuable. You'll get sick and can't draw, you'll burn out and can't do your job, you'll be emotionally unable to do your regular helpfulness for whatever reason, and you'll start to feel like you have no worth anymore.
But that's not true. You have worth, you deserve comfort and companionship and happiness, and that's not a conditional thing. You deserve that, even if you can't be Useful and Productive and all that shit.
It's an easy trap to fall into to justify yourself as "well, at least I help/make art/work hard" and have that be entirely too much of your self-esteem. Being proud of your work is fine. Being proud of yourself solely through your productivity is not, because you're making it conditional. And conditional on something that can change for reasons completely outside your control!
You gotta stop thinking about it like you gotta justify the space you take up on the planet. It's great if all those things make you happy: just make sure they're not the only things that make you feel like you are justifying your existence, or you'll crater if they get taken away.
You are lovable and likable and you have value as a person and a member of society, even if you never can be productive again. You are enough.
Affirmations for your Inner Child
self-flagellation and self-bullying are all bad motivators for change BTW. it can be hard to escape from a spiral but genuinely u have to be nice to urself or nothing will change
This goes out to the survivors who haven't spoken up because they're afraid of not being believed,
I believe you.
To the survivors who have been called a liar, or been told things like "maybe you just misunderstood,"
I believe you.
To the survivors who haven't been believed because the other person is so well loved or well respected by others,
I believe you.
To those who have been silenced, shoved aside, or ignored,
I believe you.
To any and all survivors,
I believe you. I believe you. I believe you.
Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.
Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.
things to not dwell on:
people who treated you badly
things you can’t change
comparing yourself to others
things to think about more:
baby animals
people who love u unconditionally
good things in your life that make you happy
days and times to look forward to