Y/n, In A High Voice, Holding Barbie: Hey, Ken! I Was Thinking About Going Back To School And Starting

Ghost: BE A BETTER PERSON Y/N: WHY? Ghost: BECASUE SOMEONE NEEDS TO HAVE MORALS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP AND IT SURE AS FUCK AINT GONNA BE ME

He has been there.

For 7 hours.

Clearly I’m in love with @vanessahater73 ‘s headcannon

On mission

Y/N: *taking out a knife* every room can become a panic room if you give me just a fucking minute...

Soap: I'm scared LT... LT?

Ghost: I'm horny.

#ranfren

VIXEN — HAN SEOUL-OH

A/N frustrated about there being not enough fics with this man, so i took matters into my own hands

PAIRING alyssa spilner (oc) x han seoul-oh

TW/TAGS soft, sometimes a little bit of angst, mature (cursing, blood, 18+)

FIC SUMMARY alyssa spilner is brian's younger, half-sister, who is dragged into her brother's world filled with fast cars, reckless driving and people that just can't stay dead.

LIST OF CHAPTERS:

chapter one — "rat poison"

chapter two — "heart-to-heart"

chapter three — (coming soon)

Y/n: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Gaz: Several traffic violations.

Ghost: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Soap: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

Price: Also, that’s not our car.

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.

Ghost: ... Your what?

Y/n: My friends.

Soap: Are they saying “friends”?

Price: I think they're being sarcastic.

Gaz: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Y/n! All of your friends are in this room.

Y/n: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: This food is too hot... I cant eat it.

Ghost: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.

Everyone at the table: *silence*

Gaz: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!

Price: One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!

〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰〰

Y/n: If you want my advice-

Gaz: No offense but you’re the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill Ghost. Multiple times.

Y/n: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, he also tried to kill me.

Ghost: It’s true. It was mutually attempted murder.

My (undead) heart beats for you!!

Redraw of that one Valentines Day Deadpool card by Patrick Brown.

Hiromi-kun

Committed- 141&Los Vaqueros

Reader was kidnapped but somehow made it out under less than 24 hours for a specific reason

Price: we know what this group does to people in our team...

Ghost: if we don't find them in 24...we notify the spouse

Gaz: can they even make it?

Ale: they will

Rudy: they have to

*Soap comes running into the room*

Soap: GUYS!GUYS!CHECK THE NEWS!

-On tv-

News reporter: and are you sure this isn't some prank?

R/N: I'm telling you...i escaped, they choked me..to death...woke up in some coffin, my phone is at 1%...but i can't break my duolingo streak...I'm learning Mexican because my wife is spanish

-everyone looks at Rudy-

Rudy: they're learning spanish for me?*water eyes bc..#proudwife*

consider... Ghost babytrapping reader. It's something some could see Soap or Graves doing, but never Simon.

He's so sly and sneaky, never showing his needs, but when he senses you drifting away, he will slip a pill in your drink when he's sure he's ovulating to ride you till sunset, making sure to milk you dry

a/n: god I love these requests

minors DNI- warnings: baby-trapping duh, trans ghost as well

ghost wasn’t ever going to admit how much he wanted you, how much he needed you in fact. He didn’t want to put into words how he felt- but he knew deep in his gut that you were his, right? You had to be his in some way. You and him had been friends for quite a while, and eventually just enough more that he could call you to his barrack any time of night and have that perfect feeling of sex fade into his senses with you

that’s all you really were though- fuck buddies. God he hated that term, it made his gut boil with envy and hate that someone could slide into your life and end it all so easily. No, no, that couldn’t happen. He wouldn’t let it happen.

these thoughts all brewed in his mind over the months, but the thing that set it all in motion was when he saw you at the closest base pub getting all close to some civilian. That’s what truly got him going, the fact you were flirting with a civilian- not even part of the team, although he’s not quite sure if that would have been worse.

sure he could tell you his feelings straight up, but where’s the point in that?

so he made a plan. It started in physical motion the second you got back from base and he texted you to come to his room for the usual quick fuck, nothing horrible so far

he had this all planned out- unknown to you of course. Any condom you have now has little needle holes poked in and any drink at his house has just a smidge of something he found just to make sure he takes

he rides you all fucking night even when your half asleep and tired, he still keeps bouncing on your length, his body clenching around your member and his folds wet and inviting as if he was trying to keep every little drop inside of him, his gummy walls squeezing every little drop he can get out of you and cockwarming you till you fall asleep next to him

he just felt it in his bones that it was gonna take, it just had to. And god was he close to bouncing in joy when he pulled out a test a few days later and it came up positive, him getting ready to put on some fake tears to tell you. You couldn’t really just be fuck buddies now, could you?