Latest Posts by thewillywonka - Page 4

I like your grandma already. ☝️😌

Can you please post the Willy Wonka song you used in the "when your candy sells" meme you made Mr Wonka? Please 😊😊😊

Ah, here it is. Excuse the language.

Benji Ceez & Rich The Kid - Willy Wonka

What's one of your favorite songs?

Coolio's Gangster's Paradise, it's such a classic!

I just started my period and I'm cramping so I'm laying in bed watching your sexy self act crazy on tv, eating sugar cookies, and drinking ginger ale to help my stomach

Ew. TMI.

But yeah, feel better.

There's quite a difference between the occasional sweet tooth and eating sweets and candy for almost every meal.

What's your favorite food at McDonald's?

I thought we've been over this? Aren't you the same girl who suggested I build a McDonald's in my factory? I don't think you understand how unhealthy their "food" is, and I use the term loosely because it isn't food fit for human consumption. It's 40% pink paste, 20% GMOs and 40% human DNA. And it makes you overweight.

Do I look like I eat McDonald's to you? That photo alone is giving me heartburn.

Oh...! 🤭

Hey, it turns out zere's vone dog I'm not afraid of. Rolly, from 101 Dalmatians. I can relate to him. - Augustus

You can relate to a dog?

You're the only person who believes your lies, mumbler.

Homemade dinner guaranteed to taste better than ya mama's cookin'!

Indian style chicken and vegetable tray bake; sweet potatoes, courgettes, peppers, onions, cauliflower and fennel to start, tossed in oil, cumin and turmeric. Chicken pieces marinated in garlic, ginger, garam masala, homemade smoked chilli sauce, and lime juice. Roasted for 45 minutes then added broccoli, chopped garlic and tomatoes. Finished off for another 15 minutes and then served with a few dollops of raita (yogurt, mint, cucumber and coriander). And to wash it down, Verdi Spumante white sparkling wine, imported from Italy.

Look at those beautiful, bright colors. Those crisp veggies. That succulent, tender chicken.

Who said I can't hold it down in the kitchen? No one? Oh, I thought so. Ha.

There is no way to teach it, my dear.

You just let the music flow through you and it should come naturally. At least for me it does. That's the art of dance.

Let's keep pumping out the chocolate!

What are some things that help you sleep at night? I suffer kind of with anxiety and depression and nothing really calms me enough for sleep

I'm sorry you're having trouble sleeping. I used to have that problem when I first opened my factory because I had so many new ideas and nerves running through my body.

If I could suggest a white noise, storytelling or an audio book app, those always help me. The best ones, I think, are vintage and oldies music live streams with rain put over them. Some good free apps and YouTubers that stream music and white noise 24hrs:

Nemo's Dreamscapes (YouTube, and the best one, in my opinion)

Chilling (Scary storytelling app, if you're into that sort of thing)

Yellow Brick Cinema (YouTube)

Relax Rain (App)

The Relaxed Guy (YouTube)

Dream Musicas (YouTube)

Sleep Radio (App)

Free Books And Audio Books (App)

I recommend taking a hot bath with any oils, bath bombs or epsom salts beforehand since baths ease folks into a more relaxed state of mind. Also, Aromatherapy products are excellent for induced sleep. I hope these help you and you find a solution that works! I'm curious. Let me know! Goodnight and sleep tight.

If a girl's coochie smells like tuna fish is that bad for men? Asking for a friend 😅😐😶🤐

I think m-maybe that's a q-question for your gynecologist, dear girl.

...Heh...yeah. Gynecologist.

I'm not a doctor. I'm a chocolatier. I make chocolate. 'Kay?

Homemade dinner guaranteed to taste better than ya mama's cookin'!

Indian style chicken and vegetable tray bake; sweet potatoes, courgettes, peppers, onions, cauliflower and fennel to start, tossed in oil, cumin and turmeric. Chicken pieces marinated in garlic, ginger, garam masala, homemade smoked chilli sauce, and lime juice. Roasted for 45 minutes then added broccoli, chopped garlic and tomatoes. Finished off for another 15 minutes and then served with a few dollops of raita (yogurt, mint, cucumber and coriander). And to wash it down, Verdi Spumante white sparkling wine, imported from Italy.

Look at those beautiful, bright colors. Those crisp veggies. That succulent, tender chicken.

Who said I can't hold it down in the kitchen? No one? Oh, I thought so. Ha.

Oh-

Well I'm not German, how was I supposed to know that? Hmph.

Nobody:

Absolutely no one in the world:

You: Good morning my little chocolate chips!

..

(Ilysfm 😂😂😂)

Well, everybody likes chocolate chips and if anyone doesn't then they need their head checked.

Maybe, but you came at me first. Why are you always on the defensive whenever I talk about Alice? She's a terrible girl who doesn't know up from down or left from right half the time. She spiked your tea, what more evidence do you need? I think your top hat is a little too tight, Tarrant.

I'm sorry for our little fight earlier. This new herbal tea I'm drinking has me acting strange. Emphasis on herbal. I think Alice spiked it

All is forgiven. And since we're apologizing, I'm sorry for telling Edward that you're a no good gap tooth tea-drinking scallywag. Heh.

I'm not sorry for my comments about Alice, though. I stand by them, and now you see what I mean for yourself. She's clearly got you tripping off the herbs. What is it this time? Opium Poppy? Tsk tsk.

I'm sorry for our little fight earlier. This new herbal tea I'm drinking has me acting strange. Emphasis on herbal. I think Alice spiked it

All is forgiven. And since we're apologizing, I'm sorry for telling Edward that you're a no good gap tooth tea-drinking scallywag. Heh.

I'm not sorry for my comments about Alice, though. I stand by them, and now you see what I mean for yourself. She's clearly got you tripping off the herbs. What is it this time? Opium Poppy? Tsk tsk.

I have this theory that you're bipolar. Mainly cause when you go from being cheery to angry and petty quick. Every time the kids say something annoying you snap at them. When Augustus fell in your chocolate river you looked mad and like you didn't give a fuck then when the sucky thing sucked him up you had a smirk on your face and didn't do anything cause you wanted to see what would happen. You could've easily told your oompa loompas to get him out. You seemed like you really tried to warn all the kids except Augustus. Is it because he's fat? At the beginning of the tour you sarcastically body shamed him. You lowkey got a dark side lol

I don't understand anything you're saying. Each child was a complete brat and their parents were equally irresponsible for contributing to their kid's downfall, a lack of discipline, parenting and all that stuff.

Example, Augustus and his mother are the same size, if you get what I'm saying. If she had told him to put down a cookie or two years ago then maybe he wouldn't have been so tempted and greedy at the factory. And I was the true victim here, I had to drain my poor chocolate river and replace all the contaminated chocolate. That cost me a lot of money. So I don't want to hear about how I'm such a terrible person for supposedly taking a little pleasure in their pain.

Donau is very beautiful, very tasty looking. My Oompa Loompas could probably whip some up!

Nobody:

Absolutely no one in the world:

You: Good morning my little chocolate chips!

..

(Ilysfm 😂😂😂)

Well, everybody likes chocolate chips and if anyone doesn't then they need their head checked.

🙄

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Ugh. Alice. What is it?

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

I DID NOT!

Ok, maybe I did. Aheh...

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

No fair. Why am I the only one being blamed? He started it!

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Did you plan for all the kids to get hurt in ur factory.

The Oompa Loompa songs were a bit too detailed.

I’m on to you sir!

No, I didn't, life just has a funny way of serving karma. They wouldn't listen to my warnings so they paid the consequences. My Oompa Loompas are very talented at improvising songs, they're quite intelligent and creative. Seriously, those snot-nosed brats weren't harmed, merely altered. Ha.

I mean this upmost serious:

Could you record yourself reading some book?

My dear man, you could read a dictionary and it would sound heavenly.

Of course! What book would you like me to read? I was thinking Charlotte's Web as I happen to like that book.

Sticky and sick but happy. It makes me happy.

And yes we have to talk about that. Definitely. You'd be horrified by how I live.

I hope you're not standing in any rain as of now.

And most definitely, I'm a little concerned and confused about your behavior.

Oh, yeah, well it's simple.

1.: I'm weird and curious what it feels like

2.: I'm curious about 1: those gloves you wear all the time and how they feel and 2: if your hands are like I imagine them

These gloves don't come off, but you can touch them if you'd like.

Just no bare hand to hand skin contact, corona is still going around as well. We can't risk it.

Do you expect me to take your threats seriously? You throw tea parties with a little girl in a place called Wonderland.

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Edward, stay out of this please. This is between me and the clown boy.

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

...They can't be that delicious if they aren't cookies made by me.

Nobody:

Absolutely no one in the world:

You: Good morning my little chocolate chips!

..

(Ilysfm 😂😂😂)

Well, everybody likes chocolate chips and if anyone doesn't then they need their head checked.

Another weird cocoa question:

Can I touch the back of your hand, please?

Uh- 😅

Why?

Then maybe you should train her to behave then I wouldn't have anything bad to say about her for you to not appreciate. Ha ha!

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Your page growing fast af. One of your posts from bout 2 days ago got 90 something notes already wtf 😂😂🤣

I don't know! But that's magnificent!

Nobody:

Absolutely no one in the world:

You: Good morning my little chocolate chips!

..

(Ilysfm 😂😂😂)

Well, everybody likes chocolate chips and if anyone doesn't then they need their head checked.