Astarion Fanfiction - Blog Posts

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 14

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 900 (chapter 14 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, Astarion wants to take her out so she gets a nice dress, Astarion sees her in the dress and is incredibly horny and in love with her, like whoa, down boy

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

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Marin returned from the shops with Evi and Reardon, all with their arms partially full. They'd gotten food from the market, as well as a few other things.

“Astar-” she called out, stopping when she saw Astarion’s head poke out of the sitting room immediately. She blushed and let out a laugh. “Oh, hello there. I thought you’d be upstairs.”

“I was excited to see you,” he replied sheepishly. “Did you get something to wear tonight, my sweet?”

“Yes,” she giggled. “It feels a bit fanciful compared to my other dresses, but Evi assured me it looked nice. I hope I won't look silly.”

“I’m sure you chose perfectly,” he replied, grinning eagerly. “Go on, then! Get upstairs and show me. I can lace it for you.”

She obliged, carrying the dress box upstairs to Astarion's bedroom. Our bedroom? He shut the door behind them.

“Now, off with those clothes,” he purred. “I want to see your new purchase.”

“Well, turn around then,” she responded, blushing. “I want you to be surprised.”

He turned so his back would face the mirror while she changed. She pulled it from the box, feeling the finely-woven cotton and remembering how much she loved it. She slipped into it, tugging at the lacing slightly to make it fit her chest. It was a light turquoise dress, delicate and high quality with a few flourishes, but more simple than most of the gowns she saw in the shop. Though they were enviable, she wasn’t quite ready to dress so fancifully, and certainly not on Astarion’s dime. Perhaps for a party someday.

“All right, turn around.”

He spun to see her again, looking at her in the mirror and from behind. His face was soft, eyes wide, his mouth slightly open as he looked at her. That same face from the moment he first saw me again, in the bar. She could feel her heartbeat race as he stood in silence, staring at her body.

“Well then?” she pried, slightly impatient. “Will you give me a hint? I’m a bit nervous.”

“I’m sorry, my dear,” he finally responded, a funny smile spreading across his face. He walked up behind her to meet her eyes in the mirror. “You took my breath away. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Marin. You’re incredible.”

“What about the dress?” she teased, embarrassed by his intensity. “You can be a little hard to read, you know.”

“The dress is perfect for you,” he declared. “The color matches your eyes, and your hair contrasts against it without clashing. Delicate and sweet, but simple, like you. It shows off your pretty shoulders and collarbones; it hugs your frame exactly right. You look perfect, darling. The loveliest creature I’ve ever laid my eyes upon.”

She watched in the mirror as her face went bright pink from his compliments. She was incredibly flattered, but also surprised by how much he picked up on. I forgot how fashionable he is. Does he always take me in with this much detail? Gods above. I hope not.

“Th-thank you,” she managed, butterflies in her stomach. “You promise that I don’t look silly?”

“Darling, it looks so perfect that it feels like a shame to lace it up and go anywhere,” he chuckled. “If I hadn’t promised you a real date tonight, I would keep you in this room, in that dress, and…”

He took a deep breath, shuddering as he let it out. He pressed up behind her, his hands on her hips, his interest poking at her tailbone. His cock was completely hard already, without a moment of attention from her.

“Holy hells,” she whispered. “Really?”

“It’s certainly not a lie, darling,” he responded breathlessly, making her giggle.

“So…” she went on flirtatiously. “Are we still going out?”

“We are, my sweet,” he declared. “I want to take you on a proper date, like I never could in the past. You deserve it. And to be honest… I would like to show you off a little.”

She blushed even more at the prospect of being seen out with Astarion, Lord Astarion, by people who knew who he was.

“But I want you to know,” he whispered in her ear, “that I will most likely be hopelessly aroused by my beautiful date the entire time. Perhaps you’ll take pity on me and… we can keep our outing slightly brief this time.”

He smirked at her in the mirror, his hands on her waist where the dress cinched in close. She turned around and kissed him, swooning and growing excited herself. He pulled away from her at last, seemingly with great effort, taking another deep breath to steady himself.

“Bleeding hells, Marin,” he murmured. “My head is light. I should get dressed. Something with long shirttails in the front…”

She giggled at his honesty.

“What about me?” she protested as he started to wander away.

“Hm? What about-”

“My lacing!” she laughed. “You said you’d help me!”

“Oh! Shit.” He came back and took the laces in his hands. “I did say that. I’m sorry for behaving like such a fool. You have a way of unraveling me, I told you.”

He pulled each section of the ribbon until it was perfectly taut against her skin without causing discomfort. His nimble fingers moved quickly, but with precision, brushing across her upper back as he worked. She desperately wanted those hands all over her body, without delay. Holy hells. This will be the longest dinner of all time.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 13

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 600 (chapter 13 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, Astarion's PTSD is really bad after last chapter, Marin comforts him, they talk about the ritual and other stuff from the past

Warnings: PTSD symptoms and mentions of ab*se (Astarion's past) and violence

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

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Next chapter

Astarion laid his head back on the edge of the tub, letting the warm water calm his senses and quiet his mind. The water was a pale, transparent pink from the dissolving blood. He stared blankly at the tiled wall where it met the ceiling.

“May I come in?” Marin’s muffled voice asked from the other side of the door.

He nodded faintly, before remembering she couldn’t see him. “Yes,” he mumbled, his voice low.

He flicked his eyes to her form as she entered the room, wearing one of Astarion’s robes, shutting the door behind her. Her hair was wet from the bath. She perched on the edge of the tub, watching him.

“My silver star,” she fawned, trying to soothe him. “I’m so glad you’re not injured.”

He stared straight ahead, numb.

“I attacked him. He was unarmed.”

“But so much can go wrong in a fight,” she responded. “We both know that. And I’m glad you’re all right.”

“Am I?” he muttered, almost to himself. “I feel so very… hollow.”

“Please, Astarion,” she whined. “Come back to me, my love.”

He turned his head, taking in her gentle face, full of sympathy and concern. For me. Those oceanic eyes. Marin.

“I’m a killer,” he said flatly, reciting from memory. “A monster.”

Her eyebrows furrowed hearing that.

“That’s not how I see you,” she responded, her voice soft. “No matter what was done to you, or what you were made to do.”

“I was enjoying his pain, Marin,” he muttered. “Of my own volition. Just like I enjoyed Cazador’s. I’m a terrible, evil man. I’m a monster. I don’t deserve to be loved.”

“But you feel my pain, don’t you?” she countered. “You’d do everything under the sun to make it better. You’ve said so a thousand times.”

He nodded, meeting her eyes.

“Then you’re not a monster,” she went on. “You’re not him, Astarion. Cazador was a monster. He deserved to die, and it was the only way out. I will never blame you for killing him, my love.”

“But all those other people… They’re dead because of me. Suffering in Avernus, instead of me.”

“And Cazador would never have felt guilty, if he’d gone through with the ritual,” she replied. “He would have killed them all, extinguished my precious star, and never worried about it for as long as he lived. You’re not him.”

He submerged his head, thinking as he worked the dried blood off of his face and hair. He re-emerged to her still staring at him with concern.

“You missed some,” she remarked, reaching for a cloth. “Here.”

She wetted the cloth and rubbed his sensitive elf ear; behind his earlobe, and inside the conch, close to the opening. He relaxed his eyelids and subconsciously tipped his head towards the side she was touching. His inner ear felt pleasantly fuzzy with the stimulation. He regained his senses as she moved her hand away.

“Why are you so kind to me, Marin?”

“You’ve been kind to me,” she responded without hesitation. “And besides, you deserve it, even if you don’t believe you do.”

He stared quietly up into her blue-green eyes, feeling like she was sucking the poison out and replenishing him, as she often had, years ago. She gave him a gentle smile, holding his gaze.

“I think I’m clean enough,” he muttered finally. “I want to rest.”

“Me too,” she admitted. “I’m exhausted.”

He put his hand on hers as she turned to get up from the edge of the tub.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “For caring.”

“Always, my love.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 12

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1.4k (chapter 12 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, Marin's ab*sive ex shows up looking for her, Astarion does a "muahaha" and literally tortures him oops (sorry I know I was meant to be watching him dammit), Asti has some PTSD stuff and Marin comforts him

Warnings: graphic descriptions of violence, PTSD symptoms (Astarion), brief mentions of emotional ab*use

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Wouldn't you rather be a widow than a divorcee?

3 Days Later

“Lord Astarion,” came Reardon’s voice from the other side of the heavy door. “It’s urgent. Someone’s at the gate.”

Astarion’s heart started to pound at once. The moment I’ve been waiting for. He tossed his book aside, grabbed his dagger and threw a robe over his nightclothes, tying it closed in a hurry. Marin stirred from sleep.

“What’s going on?” she mumbled, confused.

“Stay here, my love,” he whispered, harsher than intended. “You’re safe here. I’ll be back.”

Astarion closed the door behind him and took a deep breath, slowing his movements and putting on an air of confidence. He made his way down the stairs, meeting Reardon at the bottom.

“I’m sorry to disturb your rest, m’lord. I think it’s him.”

“Quite alright,” he muttered. “Send Evi to my room to keep Marin calm. Stay on the landing with them.”

“Of course,” Reardon replied. “The sentries have him under control. No weapons on him. He’s right outside.”

He could feel his heart pounding, but forced himself to remain calm. He opened the front door wide, as if he were greeting a guest.

“You’ve finally arrived,” he snarled. “I’m surprised it took you three days to find me. Tsk, tsk. Perhaps you’re even slower than I reckoned.”

Del was being held between two guards, his eyes wild at the sight of Astarion.

“Please, gentlemen; bring our guest inside for me, will you?” He turned on his heel and strode in before them.

The guards dragged him in, putting him on his knees on the tiled floor, still holding either arm. Astarion brandished his dagger, the precious Rhapsody, with a flourish. He pricked the tip of his own finger, just enough to draw a drop of blood, as Del watched in confusion. He brought the finger to his mouth, licking the fresh blood.

“Mm, delicious,” he mused, turning his eyes towards Del, grinning to be sure his fangs showed. “Now, I don’t think you wish to challenge me, hm? That would be… so very dangerous.”

Del shook his head, apparently realizing his position.

“Thank you for your excellent service,” he said coolly to the guards. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to speak with him. Alone.”

The two armed fighters looked at each other, then to Astarion, before releasing their grip on the captive.

“We’ll be right outside, my lord,” one replied as they took their leave.

“Now that it’s just the two of us,” he growled down at Del, on his knees a few feet away. “I’d like to share what’s on my mind.”

“Marin wouldn’t come here to be with a little dandy like you,” Del shouted. “And a fucking vampire. You must have taken her, you monster!”

“I’m not sure you know who exactly you’re speaking to, darling,” he drawled, his voice calm. He bared his fangs again, summoning a black mist around him, feeding off the fear in the man’s eyes. Some theatrics before I crush you.

“Now, Delaney,” he hissed, every syllable sharp. He twirled Rhapsody with ease as he spoke. “I’d like to tell you how I came to control this place. I killed the vampire lord who owned it before me, by sacrificing him to a devil. I carved his flesh with this very weapon, in fact. And through that ritual, I was imbued with more power than any vampire in Faerun has ever known. More power than your tiny mind can comprehend. Now, since you’re already on your knees, perhaps I’ll allow you to beg for your life to be spared, like he did.”

Del watched him, eyes wide, seemingly trying to discern if he was serious.

“Go on!” Astarion shrieked suddenly, his voice ricocheting in the enormous hall. “Beg!”

“Please, don’t kill me, I’m- I’m sorry for trespassing-”

“Ha! You think that’s what this is about?” he snarled. “You really are slow, aren’t you? I want you to apologize for hurting my lovely Marin. Perhaps, if I like what I hear, I’ll pass your message along.”

“I love her-”

“I don’t want to hear such nonsense,” he growled, cutting Del off by gripping his jaw, hard enough to inflict pain. “I told you to apologize.”

“I’m s- I’m sorry, I don’t know what I did, please don’t-”

“Pathetic,” he sniped, cutting him off again. “You know exactly what you did. You hurt her, and now, I’m going to hurt you.”

Astarion moved swiftly and noiselessly, taking one of Del’s wrists in his hand, slashing at his arm with the dagger. He writhed and screamed, trying to pull away from his powerful grip. Astarion yanked his bloodied forearm to his mouth and drank from the wound. He pushed Del onto the marble, placing his heel on the man’s stomach and kneeling down.

Astarion drew the knife across his chest slowly, over and over, slicing through his clothes and letting out a wicked, manic laugh. He kept him pinned with his foot as he worked, bathing in his screams of agony.

“Astarion, no!” Marin’s echoing voice stopped him in his tracks. He pressed the dagger to Del’s throat before turning his head to look at her. At the top of the stairs, his servants were holding her back, trying to keep her from running into danger. Gods damn it. They were supposed to keep her upstairs; to keep her from seeing this.

“Please, Astarion, stop!” she cried, desperate. “Don’t kill him, please!”

He looked back down to the disgusting creature writhing and bleeding beneath his foot. I wanted to kill the bastard slowly. But she’s seen enough death for seven lifetimes. Especially after what I did. I can’t make her watch this. With great struggle, Astarion wrested control from the bloodthirsty monster inside him, longing to slit the man’s throat and bathe in his blood.

“This is her mercy, not mine,” he growled slowly, keeping his dagger still against Del’s neck as he knelt to lean close to his face. “I would have enjoyed killing you, slowly and painfully. If you ever return, I will end your life without hesitation. Hm?”

Del nodded, his eyes huge and terrified.

“I’ll be watching you,” he snarled, down to a whisper. “For the rest of your wretched life. You will never again take advantage of her kind heart or trouble her mind.”

“Let him go,” Astarion yelled to the guards outside in advance. He relaxed the blade, standing and taking the pressure off of his chest. Del immediately scrambled to his hands and knees and out the front door, running for his life. He stood and watched, motionless, before letting the bloodied Rhapsody fall from his hand. The heavy dagger clattered to the ground and broke the deafening silence left behind.

“I’m so sorry, my love,” he called out, not turning to look at her, still frozen in place. “I’m sorry that you saw. You don’t need to be afraid.”

He heard quick footsteps down the stairs, and turned to see Marin running towards him, slipping in her bare feet across the smooth floor. He absorbed her force as she crashed into him. He buried his head in her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Marin,” he whispered, feeling manic. “I’m sorry. I wanted to make him pay for what he did, to make him suffer-”

“Cazador is dead, Astarion,” she insisted. His whole body stiffened upon hearing his tormentor’s name, his stomach churning. “You don’t need to be afraid anymore. You don’t need to kill him ever again.”

“What in the hells-”

“You were the same way at the ritual,” she whimpered. “You were so scared then, and you did a terrible thing because of it. I couldn’t watch it happen again.”

“I’m not scared of Del,” he snapped, his tone harsher than he ever used with her. “I wanted to taste his fear. I was going to torture him to death. I only stopped because I… I know you’ve seen enough.”

“You were afraid of losing me. Afraid he could hurt me. But you don’t need to kill him to keep me safe, Astarion.”

Hearing those words, he felt a wave of sorrow rising inside him. All his defenses fell. He burst into tears, sobbing mournfully into her shoulder. Her long hair stuck to his cheeks.

“I don’t even know why I’m crying,” he lamented. “I don’t know why it hurts.”

“It’s all right, love,” she whispered, holding him tight. “It’s all right to hurt.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 11

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1k (chapter 11 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, Astarion & Marin arrive home, he's worried about her, Marin talks to housekeeper about Astarion and hears how he was when they broke up, they have a date at home together

Warnings: brief talk of leaving an ab*sive relationship; conversation about sex work (housekeeper's and allusions to Astarion's)

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

“Marin, my sweet,” came Astarion’s gentle voice from above. She felt his thin, chilled fingers against her cheek. “We’re home.”

She opened her eyes to see him smiling down at her on his lap. The golden sunshine of the early evening lit his eyes from the side, making them glow red-orange.

“Let’s go inside, hm?” he prompted.

She nodded, fighting through her drowsiness as he helped her sit up against his shoulder. Her belongings were gone.

“What about my things?” she asked, blinking away sleep.

“Reardon carried them in for us, darling,” he assured her. “I didn't want to disturb you, so I let you stay on my lap for a little while longer. You looked so peaceful.”

“Oh,” she mumbled. “You're sweet.”

“I'm so very glad to have you here, my love,” he whispered, kissing her forehead before rising to help her out of the carriage.

“Perhaps we'll eat on the terrace,” he remarked, offering his arm to walk with him. “The sunshine is lovely this evening.”

The front door was left open for them. Astarion led her down the hall towards a savory smell.

“Good evening,” he greeted Evi as they entered the kitchen.

“Welcome home, my lord! And you've brought Lady Marin.” Evi smiled kindly at her.

“Yes,” he replied, admiring Marin. “Would you mind keeping her company? I'll only be a few minutes.”

“Of course,” Evi responded graciously as Astarion left the room. “You look like you've had a long day, dear. Why don't you make yourself comfortable?”

She obliged, sinking into a kitchen chair. Evi turned her back to cut some bread on the counter. He doesn’t want to leave me alone after today.

“It’s so fortunate to have you here,” she continued. “If there's anything I can do to make you more comfortable, please tell me, my lady.”

“Thank you. It means a lot.”

“Of course,” Evi responded. “I've seen how nasty men can be in my old profession. I'm glad you're safe, here, with us.”

Marin felt a blush spreading across her face. How much did Astarion tell her?

“Working here has been more pleasant,” she went on. “Lord Astarion has been very kind to me. He’s a respectful man.”

“What was he like?” she asked, trying to hide her interest, despite her warm face.

“Back then? Well, I shouldn't say too much,” she replied, lowering her voice before continuing. “He was never my client; don’t worry, dear. He was an occasional guest that the men and women fought over, since he was rich, and charming. He used to stay for a drink and talk with us, as if he wanted the company more than anything else we offered. That’s how I learned he was looking for a housekeeper, and I was tired of my trade after so many years. He was such a gloomy man back then, haunted by something. Despite his best efforts to cover for it.”

“That was… after we broke up,” she managed, her throat tight.

“Was it, dear?” Evi turned to face her again, looking shocked. “I could tell you were special to him right away. He isn't normally so accommodating. No one stayed overnight here in the past, even his dates. I’ve not seen him so excited about anyone. But he never told me you were the one from all that time ago.”

“He told you about our relationship?” she choked out.

“Never a word about it, and I never wanted to ask,” she replied, keeping her voice low. “He’s a private person, of course. But I know a broken heart when I see one. Reading people was part of my work, you know?”

Marin nodded, her face burning.

“He likes to keep some distance from his staff, so I shouldn’t intrude,” Evi went on quietly, turning back to the counter. “I know he’s got a soft heart under all that pride, though. Not a lot of noblemen are kind to brothel girls. Or servants, for that matter.”

“Thank you for telling me, Evi,” Marin responded earnestly.

“Of course, my lady.”

They heard a door open, and Astarion’s quiet footsteps approaching the kitchen. He popped in with a flourish.

“The terrace, my lady?” he purred, offering Marin his hand. She giggled and took it. “Evi, would you mind bringing it out?”

Without another word, he swept Marin out of the kitchen and down the hall. They stepped outdoors onto a brick patio surrounded by planters. On a table, there were three glasses: two with wine, and one with little flowers he’d picked.

“Is this where you went?” she asked, a smile spreading across her face.

“Yes,” he responded with a chuckle. “I thought it would be sweet. Perhaps it’s silly.”

“It's not silly,” Marin assured him. “I love it.”

Astarion tried to suppress his own smile as he led her to the table and took a seat across from her. Evi appeared with food and silverware for them before excusing herself. It was soup with a variety of vegetables, and some fresh bread. Marin started to eat right away, realizing how hungry she was.

“I know today was… difficult,” Astarion said carefully. “I want you to know that I don’t have any expectations, all right? You don’t even have to sleep in my bed, if you don’t want to. There are plenty of spare rooms. I don’t want you to feel rushed, or guilty. Not with me.”

“I feel… numb,” Marin admitted. “I’m unsure how to feel. But not about you, Astarion.”

His eyebrows went up with surprise, his eyes remaining soft.

“I just want you to feel safe,” he pressed. “Like you did for me, back then. I can’t repay the debt I owe to you, but… I need to try.”

“I do feel safe here,” she replied honestly. “I always feel safe with you.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 10

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 700 (chapter 10 of 17)

Setting: Marin's house

Content: Marin's POV, Marin & Asti go to Marin's house for her things, she gets emotional about leaving her old home, she leaves a break-up note for her husband, they're both anxious, Asti comforts her

Warnings: brief talk of leaving an ab*sive relationship

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin laid her head on Astarion’s lap in the carriage, unable to relax, despite the comfortable seat and his hand in her hair. They had been laughing and kissing for the first part of the ride, but both had grown increasingly quiet as they approached their destination: her home.

“I don’t want to feel like I’m forcing you to do this, darling,” Astarion insisted quietly. “I’m here to help, and that’s all.”

“You aren’t forcing me,” she replied blankly.

“Are you sure? You feel so far away from me, my love,” he responded. She looked up at him from his lap, her face empty.

“I don’t know how to feel. I’m numb. But I know it’s the right thing.”

His eyes were a pale red in the midday sun; his brow furrowed with concern. 

“This has to come from you,” he insisted. “If you change your mind, you don’t have to go through with it, all right?” She nodded.

“Nearly there, m’lord,” called the driver, Reardon, from the front of the carriage. Marin sat up, looking out the window again, her heart racing.

“It’ll be all right, my love,” Astarion whispered, likely listening to her heartbeat.

They pulled up at the edge of the street. The house looked exactly how she'd left it the night before, thankfully. He hasn't been home yet.

“Did you want me to go in with you?” Astarion asked gently. “If it makes you feel better, I can. But I don't want you to feel pressured just because this is what I want.”

“I want you to,” she mumbled. “I don't know if I'm strong enough.”

“Of course.”

Astarion exited the carriage, standing below and offering a steadying hand up to her. She took it and stepped down herself. My garden, she thought. I won't get to see it anymore. She teared up at the thought.

“What's the matter?”

“My garden,” she admitted. “I'll miss it here, in some ways. It's home.”

“I understand, my sweet,” he replied, sympathetic. “You can plant whatever you’d like again, hm?” She nodded.

He placed his hand gently on her lower back and followed her inside the house. She searched quickly for her things - her clothes, her hairbrush, her favorite books, her old sentimental items. Her favorite blanket, and her old apron, and her gardening tools and seeds. Astarion’s letter from its hiding place. She was leaving all the furniture, food, and anything else she shared with Del behind. Before leaving, she scrawled a short note on a piece of paper, leaving it on the kitchen table:

Delaney, I’m leaving. I’m sorry it had to come to this. We can deal with the paperwork in the future, after things have settled. If you care for me, please allow me space to live my own life. -Marin

Astarion and Reardon helped her take her things to the carriage. Seeing all her belongings collected in bundles reminded her of their adventuring days, when everything they owned came along with them. Is my life here really that small? She would miss the plants, and the little birds who visited the front garden in the morning.

“We should get on the road as soon as possible,” Astarion told her, gently as he could. “I don’t want to run into him if we can help it.”

She looked back at her home before accepting his help into the carriage. Her little life. The love she thought she shared with Del, once. Did he truly care for me, even back then? Perhaps it had all been doomed from the very start.

As they pulled away, Marin could feel her stomach churning. She whimpered with anxiety.

“My sweet, what can I do to help?” Astarion asked, uneasy.

“It hurts so much,” she cried. “I can’t bear to look.”

“Rest on my lap again, darling,” he reassured her, guiding her down to his thighs. He pulled the blanket from her things and laid it across her shoulders. “Everything will be all right. I promise.”

She felt her discomfort easing slightly as he petted her hair, with her favorite blanket covering her. She realized how very tired she was, having spent the night tossing and turning, and the morning worrying. She looked up at Astarion’s gentle face, watching her with concern. Finally, her eyelids started to feel too heavy to keep them open any longer.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 9

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1.3k (chapter 9 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, pillow talk/post-bath chill time, Astarion worries about the future, talk about their past relationship and break-up, Marin worries about the future, mutual care and comfort

Warnings: brief mentions of death, the ascension ritual, Cazador being a POS

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin sat with her back against Astarion’s chest, his legs accommodating her. They were settled on a couch at the far end of his room, the curtains open wide beside them, late at night. He was absent-mindedly combing her damp hair with his fingers.

“I like that,” she murmured.

“Hm?” Astarion perked up at her voice. “I’m sorry, I was leagues away.”

“You touching my hair; it’s comforting,” she explained.

“Ah, yes. Well, you have lovely hair,” he replied, still distant.

Marin turned her head back to see him looking absently out the window at the night sky. “What’s on your mind, Astarion?”

“Stars are pretty tonight,” he responded, not turning to look at her.

“Now, don’t push me out,” she scolded. “You’re acting strangely. If you won’t tell me why, I’ll have to assume it’s about me.”

“My dear, it’s not you.” He paused before clarifying his statement. “I suppose it’s related to you. But it’s not your fault.”

“What’s with the cryptic language?” she challenged him, watching for any sign of reaction. He is so damned stoic when he doesn’t want to share.

“I don’t want anything to change,” he admitted, still avoiding her eyes. “It feels like being suspended in a perfect dream, and I’m terrified to wake up.”

Marin’s stomach dropped. “What do you want, then?”

“In my heart, I want to whisk you away from him, to make you mine forever, and spend the rest of my days with you,” he responded earnestly. “But I’m so afraid. I don’t think I could bear to lose you ever again. It took all my willpower to keep from destroying myself the last time.”

“Why are you convinced you’ll lose me?”

“I’m afraid I’m not what you need, dear. Afraid that I couldn’t be, no matter how badly I wanted to,” he explained, his voice starting to shake. “You’re the only one I’ve ever loved, Marin. Perhaps I cared for someone before I died, but… I can't remember.”

Tears started slipping down his face.

“That’s all right, Astarion,” she responded, her voice soft. “I don’t care who you were with before me. It was never important.”

“You were so kind to me, and I fell in love with you, but I didn’t know a damned thing about how to do that,” he lamented, his voice nearly a whisper. “I had to learn everything with you. And after you left, I- there was nobody else like you, and I didn’t want to try. So I never learned how to love anyone.”

She turned around and folded her legs, sitting upright in front of him. He was staring out the window as if he were a thousand miles away.

“You know how to love me, right?” she asked, reaching out to touch his cheek. “You did back then.”

“I don’t know what kind of a partner I’d be, my love,” Astarion confessed, his dark crimson eyes finally looking at her. “The months we spent together were in our honeymoon phase. I know how to sweep you off your feet, and make you laugh, and how to fuck you. But I don’t know how to… do the next part.”

“We went through hell together. I’d hardly call it a honeymoon,” she remarked.

“You know what I mean, darling.”

“I’m serious,” she went on. “We had parasites in our brains, and we made sense of that together. We came to terms with it and changed our fate. You were scared of… him, but I helped you find your strength. You had to fight through so much pain and fear to be close with me. We were a team.”

“And then, I lost you,” he recounted. “I was selfish, and I treated our relationship like a foregone conclusion. I was so afraid of the future if you didn’t agree to eternity with me. I took you for granted and I lost you.”

“But you grew,” she emphasized. “I know you did, because when you first ascended, you would never have admitted what a selfish prick you were. Even after the fact.”

“I don’t know why you helped me with that ritual,” he lamented. “You're such a kind and peaceful person, and I roped you into something indescribably awful.”

“I was terrified,” she confessed. “I thought you might die. At the time, helping you ascend seemed like the only way to save you. I didn't want that debt to transfer to you, for depriving Mephistopheles of all the souls he’d been promised. I was too afraid to lose you, and I acted selfishly.”

“Your selfishness is much less wretched than mine, darling,” he assured her with a sad chuckle. “I wanted it for my own gain. But… I was terrified, too. More than I knew how to express.”

“I know,” she whispered. She put her arms and legs around him and hugged him with her whole body. He rested his chin on her shoulder. “I forgive you, Astarion.”

They sat, quietly holding each other for a long time.

“Marin, I'm afraid you still care for him,” he whispered. “And that you haven't left because you don't truly want to be with me.”

“I do want to be with you, Astarion,” she insisted. “And of course I care for him. But even when he was kind to me, I never loved him the way I loved you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, but I thought I could never make it work with you,” she admitted. “Things were so emotional at the end, and everyone was ready to go their separate ways, and… I was afraid to be left behind in Baldur’s Gate, with nothing but my memories haunting me. Del said all the right things. He felt like the safe choice, and he wanted so badly to marry me. I thought maybe it would be romantic to elope with him, and it might… take away the hurt if I made a new life. Obviously he didn't start acting like this until later.”

Astarion stayed quiet, just holding onto her.

“I’m sorry that I chased you away,” he spoke up, finally. “I feel like I made your life worse in so many ways, and all you tried to do was help. I don’t-”

“My life was full of love when we were together, Astarion. I don’t regret our relationship.”

He pulled back and looked into her eyes, his face sad.

“Why don’t you leave him?” he asked earnestly. “You wouldn’t have to worry about a soft place to land. I want you here, by my side.” She could feel her face burning. “What’s wrong, darling?”

“I'm having an affair,” she lamented. “Do you have any idea how much guilt I feel? I- I hate myself.”

“You have no reason to hate yourself,” Astarion responded, trying to comfort her. “I know you well enough, Marin. You would never have done this if you weren’t at your wits’ end with him. He set all of this in motion by treating you this way.”

“And I should have fixed it instead of making it worse!” she wailed, harsher than she meant to.

“Why do you need to fix it?” Astarion asked. “Why do you assume everything bad that happens is your fault, my dear?”

I don’t know. She felt tears welling up in her eyes.

“I’m afraid,” she blurted out.

“Of what, darling?”

“Of leaving him,” she sobbed. “Of the future. Of everything.”

“Perhaps you need some rest, my sweet,” he said gently. She nodded, tears streaking her red cheeks. Astarion gathered her up in his arms, holding her close to his chest and standing to cross the room. He laid her on his bed, pulling the blanket up before getting in next to her.

“We can be brave together,” he whispered in her ear. “Starting tomorrow.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 8

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 2.3k (chapter 8 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin shows up unannounced, masturbation talk/demonstration, teasing, dirty talk, fingering, PIV sex, doggy style/hittin' it from the back, Astarion's bitey urges make them switch, riding, multiple orgasms, Astarion bites his own arm to stop himself, they talk a little about their past

Warnings: vampire bite described in some detail

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

We do it in the dark / With smiles on our faces / We're trapped and well concealed / In secret places

A couple weeks later

“Lord Astarion, you have a visitor at the door,” Evi announced formally, poking her head into the sitting room.

Astarion scowled, looking up from his book over the rim of his reading glasses. “I'm not expecting anyone. Who the hells is it?”

“Marin,” she snickered.

“What in the- Gods damn you, Evi!” Astarion snarled, nearly dropping his book as he jumped to his feet. “That's not funny!”

Marin appeared behind her at the entryway. Evi left with a smirk on her face.

“She thinks she’s terribly clever, baiting me like that. She's meant to be my employee,” Astarion grumbled, before softening up. “My sweet, what are you doing here?”

“Del went out of town for the night, so I hurried through all my chores and caught a carriage straight here,” Marin muttered excitedly, putting her arms around his waist. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you terribly, my dear,” he whispered, one hand in her hair. “It's been too long.”

“It's been sixteen days,” she giggled. “I counted.”

He pulled back from her hug a little, his hands on her shoulders. “My schedule is cleared. What shall we do?”

She kissed him, pulling him by the front of his shirt. Oh, Gods. He felt himself growing stiff right away and pulled back.

“My bedroom, then,” he purred, trying to keep control of himself.

“Yes, please,” she giggled again, her cheeks pink.

He swept her off her feet, surprising her, picking her up under the knees to carry her. She let out a tiny shriek and burst into laughter. He strode quickly out of the sitting room and crossed the main floor to the staircase.

“Are you my fairytale prince?” she asked playfully.

“Darling, you wound me!” he joked as he carried her up the stairs, his voice high and overly dramatic. “Here I thought I was the vampire lord from your dirtiest novel.”

Marin turned bright red and laughed too loud. He finally set her down in his bedroom, breathless from the action.

“Hells, I forgot how much work that would be,” he chuckled. “Perhaps I'm all out of stamina now.”

Instead of responding with a joke, Marin pushed him against the wall and kissed him. Gods above. He could feel himself growing rapidly harder with her hands moving hungrily across his body.

“I missed you so, so much,” she pouted.

“Really? Let me see…” Astarion reached down under her mid-length skirt, snaking up her thigh. She jumped at his cold touch, but didn't pull away. He felt between her legs. Oh… Gods. She was soaked all the way through, to the point his fingers came away wet from even the outside of her underclothes. His cock went hopelessly hard.

“Oh, Marin,” he whispered.

“I want you so badly,” she whined, feeling clumsily for the outline of him through his pants. “I haven't had much privacy since I saw you. I'm desperate.”

He felt his cheeks and ears grow warm. “I wish I could say the same for the cause of my own desperation. It's a little embarrassing, with how much you've been on my mind, and I'm here alone…” he trailed off, feeling his cock pulse against her hand, giving him away. Marin looked up at him, bright pink.

“Really?” she whispered, a big smile on her face. “And how does that look?”

“A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell, darling,” Astarion joked, grimacing with embarrassment.

“Well, it's a good thing you aren't a gentleman, then,” she teased, smirking flirtatiously. “Because I want to know about the fun you had without me.”

“Gods, you don't really, do you?” he replied, searching her eyes for signs of a joke.

“I'll let you touch me if you show me how you touch yourself,” she giggled. His head swirled at the thought of touching her again.

“Deal,” he whispered. “Now, off with your clothes and under the covers with you.”

Both of them quickly got down to their underclothes and slipped under the blankets.

“I wait until I know I'm alone and sure to be undisturbed,” he whispered. “And then I, uh…” He mimed a jerking motion.

“No fair! You're not getting off that easy,” Marin teased. They both snickered at the double entendre. “You have to show me or you're not getting any prizes, you swindler.”

Astarion closed his eyes and groaned, his stomach muscles tense. “All right, I'll show you, but you owe me. You'd better hold up your end of the deal.”

Marin nodded eagerly. He pulled his cock out, sliding his underclothes off, and rolled onto his side, facing the edge of the bed. He opened a drawer on his side table, pulling out a bottle of oil and getting some into his hand. Her big eyes watched his every move.

He rolled back towards her and put his oiled hand down under the covers. She tented them with her hand so she could watch him. He worked the oil down the length of himself and groaned a little. He jerked himself for a few seconds and then stopped, looking expectantly into her eyes, his cock still in his hand.

“You can touch me, but don't stop touching yourself,” she whispered. He groaned but turned onto his back to free up his pinned arm. She wiggled out of her own undergarments and positioned herself within his reach.

“And what do you do then?” she asked, gasping as he put his hand on her cunt. “If I'm not here.”

“I think of you. Of this,” he whispered, pushing his fingers inside of her. She inhaled as he felt around, finding the right spot.

“What part of this?” She watched with interest as his hand moved smoothly up and down his cock.

“Every part. The way you kiss me, the way you grab at me, the way you pull my clothes off…” She shifted herself up onto her knees, sinking all the way down onto his fingers with a tiny moan. He beckoned towards himself, looking up at her. “I think of how dripping wet you are for me, and the way you beg me to touch you.”

Instead of responding with more questions, Marin moaned and rolled her pelvis. She rubbed herself on his palm, looking down at him with lidded eyes.

“I think about the way you sound, darling,” he huffed, getting carried away watching her. He was trying to touch himself slowly for her sake, rather than desperately seeking a release like when he was truly alone.

“Yeah?” she moaned, her voice raising a bit higher. She pulled the blankets back to watch him stroking himself. She kept rubbing against his palm while he worked his fingers inside.

“And I think of how amazing it feels when you- touch me,” he muttered between his own moans. Marin's mouth fell open, her noises spilling out. “And when you have my cock- in your mouth.”

“Ohhh, Astarion,” she whined, rocking faster against his hand. Gods, she is so beautiful.

“And the perfect way you- the way you feel when I’m inside,” he groaned, slowing down further on himself. “How good you feel when you're all around me. Your beautiful face when you're mad with lust, and when you- hah- float away as you come…”

Marin cried out louder and fucked his hand harder. Her hip movements were spotty and stiff, and her eyes widened, focusing on his. She must be close. He took his hand off of himself and instead grabbed at her breast from his place below her.

“Ast- arion, I'm- going to come-” she whimpered in broken sounds.

“Yes, darling, please,” he purred. She cried out loudly, slamming her eyes shut.

“As- Asta-” she moaned, trying to make out his long name through her ecstasy. He felt her pulsing around his fingers. Thank the Gods. He could hardly bear the wait.

“You're so lovely, my dear,” he admired, keeping his fingers still as she came down from her high. “Do you want my cock?” She nodded, her eyes halfway open. He sat up and positioned himself behind her.

“Is this all right, my love?” he asked. She nodded again. He gently pushed her forward onto her elbows and knees. He looked down at her cunt as he prepared himself, lining up carefully. He felt his tension melt into bliss as she surrounded him.

“Oh, Gods, Marin,” he groaned with relief. “You are so slick, darling. You're perfect.”

He used one hand to pull her pelvis as close to his as he possibly could, eliciting a moan. He put the other on the bed to prop himself up above her. He curled down close to her body like they were animals, fucking her from behind, their sounds and bodies mingling. Her heartbeat was pounding in his ears, and he longed to bite her tender neck, to taste her again for the first time in forever. His vampiric pains were gone since his ascension, but he still felt the urge to bite. I can't, he thought. Not her. Not yet. I have to restrain myself.

“I wish I could taste you, my love,” he panted. “You smell… so lovely.”

She moaned as if the thought was invigorating for her. He felt his self-control starting to slip as he got more and more overwhelmed by the stimulation. Oh, shit. He stopped moving, making her whimper at the loss.

“I can't stay like this, Marin,” he whispered breathlessly in her ear. “I want to bite you so damned bad. Get on top of me and keep away from my mouth, all right?”

He used his remaining willpower to pull away from her and lay down. She clumsily positioned herself over him, lined up his cock, and sank down all the way to his hips. His eyes were fixed on her hands where they lay, flat on his chest.

“I'm sorry, my love,” he whimpered. “It's so hard to control myself right now. Your wrists.”

She pulled her hands away in a hurry, placing them behind her on his thighs, all of her extremities out of his fangs’ reach.

“Is this all right?” she whined, her voice high and desperate.

“You're perfect,” he huffed, putting his hands on her knees. “Fuck me just like this.”

She rocked against his pelvis and moaned loudly. He felt the pleasure in his belly building, pushing him closer to the edge.

“Are you close, my love?” he panted, holding back. She nodded, her eyes wide. He thrusted up into her, hard, bouncing her on his hips.

“Astarion!” she cried out, and he felt her pulse around his cock. He thrusted as deep as he could, desperately seeking his own relief.

Marin looked a little woozy as she came back down from her peak, and one of his thrusts sent her top half tumbling down towards him. She caught herself on his chest with her hands, her beautiful pale wrists landing in front of his face again, right as he reached the point of no return. Oh no, Marin, oh no, ohnonono-

“Shit- unh-” Astarion threw his own arm across his face and bit down, deep into his own bicep. He felt the tang of blood in his mouth, his arm burning with the strength of his hardest bite, and the pleasure in his core slipping out of his control. He cried into his upper arm, latched on tight, as he rolled his hips into her and came, hard. His muffled sounds were loud and visceral.

He unlatched his jaw, his arm falling away from his face and his chest heaving. What in the sweet hells was that? He usually had little trouble controlling his fangs, and the urge was rarely that strong to begin with. Not anymore.

“Astarion? Are you all right?”

He opened his eyes to Marin, sitting motionless on his lap, shining with sweat. The look in her eyes was almost afraid. Of me? Shit. I must have looked like a monster.

“Yes, I'm all right now,” he managed between breaths. She seemed to calm down, hearing his voice again. “I'm sorry if I frightened you, my love. I don't know what came over me. I was so afraid of leaving a mark on you, after what you said. And I never want to bite you as hard as I’m able to.”

“It’s all right,” she reassured him, climbing down from his lap. “I'm sorry for the trouble.”

“I'm the one with the urge to bite people, my dear,” he chuckled, trying to comfort her. “You’re no trouble at all.”

“I miss it too,” she muttered, almost to herself. Astarion stared at her in surprise.

“Oh, um,” she stumbled. “Being bitten, I mean. I liked it when you fed on me back then. You were always tipsy afterwards, and grateful, and… aroused, if you weren't already.”

“Yes, it's an… intimate act,” he managed, embarrassed at his past self. “I always assumed you were just going along with it, because of how badly I needed it back then, when I was so hungry.”

“Of course not,” she responded with a gentle smile, laying next to him in the crook of his unbitten arm. “And besides, it's like making a meal for someone. It's nice to feel needed.”

“I suppose so,” Astarion mused, staring up at the canopy. “I still do, you know. Need you. I’d forgotten how badly.”

“Me too,” Marin said quietly. He turned to look at her.

“I’m not quite sure why,” he admitted. “I don’t know what I can really provide for you, Marin. Besides money, I suppose.”

“You make me feel safe,” she whispered. “Like I could tell you anything. Like you can see the person inside, and you want me anyway.”

Astarion’s heart jumped into his throat. Gods, how I want you.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 7

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 800 (chapter 7 of 17)

Setting: Marin's house

Content: Marin's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin's husband fucking sucks but on screen this time, Astarion sends a letter via his servant, they are so in love and miss each other an excessive amount

I went too far for the bit on these letters and made visuals but I included a text-only version below it for accessibility~

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se & dialogue (I really tried to make this guy an emotionally ab*sive creep without being in-depth enough to bother people, difficult line to walk so I'm sorry if he seems either one-dimensional or is still upsetting)

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin loaded the bread dough into the oven, drying the sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand as she stepped away.

“You smell like an ox,” Del chided as he entered the kitchen. Marin sighed to herself.

“I'm sorry. The oven is hot. Baking is hard work, you know.”

He snickered as if the very idea was foolish, making her cheeks burn.

“Speaking of hard work, I'm off,” he muttered as he finished fastening his buttons. “Behave yourself, a’right?”

She swallowed the urge to say something nasty. “Of course I will, Del.”

“Good,” he replied, kissing her on the cheek. She plastered a smile on her face and followed him to the door.

“Have a good night,” she called as he started down the path. He responded with a half-hearted thanks, not looking back.

“Fucking prick,” she whispered to herself once the door was shut. He seemed to have grown more irritating since her return, but maybe that was imagined. He was acting the same as always, while something inside her had changed.

She took off her apron and grabbed the cushion and gloves she used for her garden. She left the door open behind her so that she could smell the bread cooking, as a reminder to check on it.

She perched on the stones around her front garden, the cushion under her knees. Feeling the sun warm her hair from behind and smelling the soil, she felt the stress of dealing with Del melt away.

“My lady?” came a woman’s voice from behind her. My lady? Marin turned to see a cloaked figure walking up her garden path. She dropped her hood as she approached, revealing a familiar face.

“...Evi?”

“Good afternoon, my lady. I come bearing a parcel from Lord Ancunín,” she announced, speaking formally as if Marin had any social standing.

“A letter? Oh, um, thank you,” she stuttered. “You didn't run into anyone on your way up the path, did you?”

“I waited for his departure before I approached,” Evi reassured her. “Lord’s orders. He wants me to confirm that you're all right.”

Marin’s face burned thinking of Astarion’s concern for her. “I am, thank you.”

“Excellent. I have one more gift from his lordship.” Evi reached into her bag, pulling out a single orange, fragrant and perfectly ripe.

“Oh, thank you!” Marin took it from her, delighted with the surprise.

“Have a pleasant day, Lady Marin,” she said, pulling up her hood before walking down the path.

“You too,” she responded, feeling like she was in a dream. She floated inside, closing the front door and putting her back against the inside of it. She held the letter tightly to her chest, her heart pounding. She checked the oven before scurrying down the hall, letter and orange in hand. She didn't want to be caught reading it in plain view, on the tiny chance Del came home to get something. She locked the bedroom door behind her, sank into the bed, and opened the envelope, addressed only Marin. The letter was written on thick, expensive paper, with Astarion's careful calligraphy folded up inside.

Marin, my sweet,

I was heartened to see your letter this evening. I miss you terribly, darling. Your visit has served as a harsh reminder of my empty bed and lonely existence. Of course, I do not blame you for that. Our time together was far more valuable to me than any continued delusion of self-sufficiency. Your joyful presence feels like sunshine on my skin after so many years in the darkness, a bittersweet feeling with which I am intimately familiar.

We disagreed at the time of my ascension on your vampiric transformation. I recall the details of those arguments quite clearly when I am lonely and disappointed in myself. I want you to know that I will accept you in any form, my love. I am not the man I used to be, but I realize I will have to prove myself worthy of your trust.

I will happily make space for you in my life if you ever feel ready for a future with me. I want nothing else as much as I want to see you happy. There is a greenhouse here which is hardly used, and it makes me long to see you working on your garden to your heart's content.

You are welcome here anytime, my dear. I hope you know that I eagerly await our next meeting. Until then, I will think of you anytime my mind wanders, as I do already.

Stay safe, darling.

Yours eternally,

Astarion

Your comment about beetroot juice made me smile. You enjoyed the fresh oranges when you were here, so I hope you will smile for me in return.

Marin flopped back on the bed, the letter pressed to her heart as if it were part of him. She stared blankly up at the rafters, tears running down her face and into her hair.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 6

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 300 (chapter 6 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Astarion needs help from his servant to get a letter to Marin, he explains the plan to her

Warnings: mentions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

“Evi, would you mind taking a day trip for me tomorrow?” Astarion simpered into the kitchen where she was sweeping up.

“Of course, my lord.” she replied. “What sort of errand might it be?”

“It's beyond the Gate. A couple of hours by carriage,” he explained. “I have a letter to be hand-delivered. It's a bit of a… delicate task, so to speak.”

Evi grinned at those words, pretending to busy herself with sweeping. “And who might be the recipient?”

“Marin,” he admitted, feeling his heart flutter as he said it aloud.

“And the postal service won't run it for you, hm?” she replied, smiling to herself.

“Cheeky,” he grumbled. “She's married.”

“Married?”

“Yes, all right?” he snapped, a bit annoyed at her for prying into his life. “I can't take the chance it will fall into the hands of her husband. That's why the post office won't do. You’re a woman, so you won’t raise suspicion if you’re seen speaking to her. I need you to deliver it personally.”

She avoided his sharp gaze, a small blush across her tanned cheeks. “Of course, my lord.”

“Thank you,” he growled. “She should be at home during the daytime. I'd like you to wait out of sight until the afternoon, when the husband leaves for work. I'm not sure what hour he leaves the house, mind you - only that he works in a tavern. Bring something to keep busy while you wait.”

“Understood, my lord.”

“I’ll provide you with some extra gold for your discretion,” he impressed upon her, speaking carefully. “I'm paying you more than usual to take most of the day off, Evi. It needs to be done exactly right. This is a matter of her safety.”

She stopped pretending to focus on her task and met his eyes, looking sincere. “There’s no need to worry, Lord Astarion. I won't let you down.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 5

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 400 (chapter 5 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin sends a letter, her husband fucking sucks, they are so in love and miss each other an excessive amount

I went too far for the bit on these letters and made visuals but I included a text-only version below it for accessibility~

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Several days later

“My lord,” came Evi’s muffled voice from beyond his study door. “The evening post has arrived.”

Astarion rose from his desk immediately. There wasn't much point in hoping, but he did, every time. He opened the door and took the envelopes from her hands.

“Thank you,” he muttered absent-mindedly, thumbing through them right in front of her. Is that-

“You're welcome,” Evi responded with a knowing smile, excusing herself. One was addressed in Marin’s handwriting, Ld. Astarion Ancunín, with a return address reading only M. He took it to his desk and cut it open immediately, his heart racing, careful not to slice through her handwriting on the envelope.

Dearest Astarion,

The days have been so dull since we parted. Del has been watching me more carefully than usual since his return, and I’ve been busy with my housework. I don't think he suspects me of our visit, but I have been more absentminded than usual, which may have set him on edge. I've been trying to keep up with my duties around the house, so as not to alert him to any changes. However, I think of our time together ceaselessly.

I long to join you again. Even returning to the bustle of Baldur's Gate felt magical compared to this town, and reminded me of our adventuring days. Del won't tell me the next time he goes out of town until a few days in advance, so I'm unsure how long it will be until I can get away again. I wish we could be together already, but we will have to wait for the next opportunity, my silver star.

My garden is thriving as the weather warms, which is cheering me up. I planted a few beets early this spring, and I think of you when tending to the sprouts. (because of the red juice)

I will write again as soon as I can. I have to be careful with this letter and will place it in the public postbox myself. In the meantime, I hope you are thinking of me the way I think of you. Our night together was far more special to me than a merely physical affair.

All my love,

Marin

Below the writing, there was a tiny doodle of a vampire (is it me?) looking at a beet.

Astarion leaned back as he finished reading, slumping down in his seat, his chest aching. She is so sweet. He almost felt guilty for being aroused at the conjured memories of her in his bed, but he knew it wasn’t a reflection of his heart. She is so much more to me.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 4

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 2.4k (chapter 4 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, oral sex, blowjob, Astarion comes all over her, dirty talk, praise, teasing, fingering, cunnilingus, PIV sex, riding, multiple orgasms, Marin comes all over him, I specifically hate the words squirting and female ejaculation both!!! but that's what happens, Marin's romantic confession, crying/comfort, soft Astarion is sad because she has to go home and he's lonely without her

There is so much fuckin' in this one, I'm only 5% sorry; these horny idiots are in LOVE and I will cry in this club about it

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

“I haven’t had a breakfast like that in a long time,” Marin chirped as she went up the stairs. The morning sun was bright now, shining in through the huge windows at the front of the house. Her red hair gleamed like raw gold in the sunlight. Gods, she’s beautiful.

“I’m glad I could treat you to it,” Astarion purred. “My servants do all the hard work, of course. I just slink between my bedroom and my study most days.”

He swatted at her butt as they reached the landing, eliciting a lighthearted protest from her.

“It’s a nice view,” he chuckled.

Marin led the way into his room, bouncing a little as she walked, acting comfortable in his home. His heart ached to share it with her for more than one night.

“So, darling. What’s next?” he prompted.

Without another word, Marin pulled him close and kissed him. His heart fluttered with excitement as she snaked her hands under his robe, grabbing at his bare chest.

“I couldn’t stop looking at your skin peeking through the top of your robe,” she whispered. “You’re so handsome.”

“And I couldn’t stop thinking about how you’re wearing nothing but my bed clothes under your robe,” he responded with a grin. She giggled, her cheeks pink.

“You were incredible last night,” she fawned.

“Why, thank you,” he replied, feeling his cock harden at the memory. “You were so very… exciting. I was rather embarrassed I couldn't go on for longer. I had hoped you enjoyed yourself enough to make up for that.”

“I haven't gotten off like that in forever,” she said earnestly, still blushing. “I'd forgotten how much I missed those skilled hands of yours.”

“These?” he purred, reaching around for her ass, causing her to jump.

“Ooh! Yes, those,” she giggled. He ran his hands over her, reaching down to where her thighs began, rubbing gently. She shuddered from the stimulation, and Astarion felt himself stiffen completely from the feel of her. He was slightly frustrated at his inability to keep his controlled demeanor with her. But perhaps it was a good thing that she made him feel differently than everyone else. Gods, I haven't lost control of myself like that since… well, since I last laid with her.

“I can feel you,” Marin remarked. She started to grind against his cock, making him pulse from the excitement.

“Well, you… have a way of unraveling me,” he admitted, inhaling deeply. She reached her hand down, beneath his robe and his underclothes, and took his cock in her soft hand. So warm.

“Is this all right?” she whispered.

“Yes,” he managed, his heart pounding. Her hand moved up and down the length of him, eliciting a groan. He shrugged off his robe, the silky material falling to the floor with a rustle.

“What do you want, Astarion?” Your hands, your mouth. Everything.

“You,” he replied. She giggled, her pink blush reappearing.

“Silly boy,” she teased. Nobody ever talks to me the way she does. “I meant, whatever shall I do with you?”

“Whatever you’d like, I suppose,” he muttered. “I'm yours.”

“Good boy,” she whispered. His cock pulsed in her hand as she praised him. “Oh, did you like that?”

He nodded, looking into her eyes. She pulled her hand away to wiggle out of her robe. He took the opportunity to grab the hem of her nightshirt, and she let him pull it up over her head. Her bare, freckled chest looked so lovely in the morning light.

“I thought I could have my fun with you, first,” she pouted as he worked his borrowed underclothes down over her hips.

“You can,” he insisted. “I wanted to see your beautiful body, darling.”

Marin’s cheeks and ears went red at his compliment.

“Then let’s dress you for the occasion as well,” she giggled, tugging at his waistband. He let her slide his underclothes off, his cock springing free. “Now, let’s get comfortable.”

She took his hand and pulled him to the bed. He sat on the edge, looking up at her.

“Good boy,” she repeated, eliciting a tiny gasp. Marin moved to her knees, taking his cock in her hand again. She licked the underside, making him shudder. She looked up at him with those enormous blue-green eyes, watching his reaction as she licked her lips and put them around the tip of his cock. He swallowed a moan and propped himself up with his arms straight behind him. Gods, I love her so much.

He bit his lip, trying to keep himself grounded. Don’t say anything stupid this time, he thought. He could feel his control slipping away as she sucked him off.

“You feel- d-divine,” he stuttered, trying to regain his eloquence. It wasn’t working. He could feel her tongue lapping, slightly stiff against the sensitive underside of his cock. He shuddered, a moan escaping his throat. He began to thrust towards her, restraining his movements to keep her comfortable.

She moaned a little with him in her mouth, driving him wild.

“Oh-h, Marin, you’re per- perfect,” he whined. “You make me want to-” Oh, shit. He felt his hips stiffening up, desperate to fuck her mouth harder. Tension was building in his belly. He tapped her shoulder, and she looked up at him with lidded eyes. Fuck, fuck.

“H-hand,” he managed. “Your hand, darling, I’m-”

She pulled her mouth off of him, leaving his cock slippery. She straightened up, leaning closer, and started jerking him off in front of her breasts, bouncing as she worked. He let his hips loose, his eyes fixed on her jiggling chest, thrusting as hard as he’d wanted to before. He rolled his hips, fucking into her hand, feeling her tits bump against the tip of his cock. He came suddenly, surprising even himself, like tumbling over a cliff. He watched as the valley between her breasts became covered in his fluid, letting himself finish before flopping back onto the bed. His arms felt like jelly.

“Holy hells, Astarion, that was a lot,” Marin panted. Fuck.

“I’m sorry,” he managed, breathless. “What a mess.”

“I didn’t say it was a bad thing, love,” she said adoringly, laying on her back next to him on the bed. Love? No, better not to make a fuss about it. It’s just a pet name.

“Oh?” he asked. She grabbed for his hand, pulling it to her body, his fingers on her cunt. She was radiating heat and very slick. “Oh, I see.”

He looked over to see her eyes glimmering back at him, her face eager. He summoned the strength to get up and crossed the room for a towel, handing it to her with a chuckle.

“What shall we do about that, I wonder?” he mused as she wiped at her chest. “I suppose… it’s only half past seven, and you have earned a reward. For your… excellent service.”

She sat up on the edge of the bed with her tits pushed out. “Yes, I have,” she responded playfully.

“You’ll have to convince me you really want it, of course,” he growled. Her face reddened even more.

“Please, Lord Astarion,” she pleaded, flirtatious. His stomach flipped, hearing her call him by that title. “I do.”

“Do you really?”

“So badly,” she continued, flopping onto her back, legs slightly open. “I just want you to touch me, more than anything in the world, Lord Astarion.”

He pounced on her and pinned her to the bed softly. She moaned and squirmed under him, not trying to escape.

“Touch you, hm?” he muttered. “Touch you where?”

“Everywhere, my love,” she whispered. There it is again. Love.

“Here?” he asked, running his fingers down the side of her neck and to her shoulder. She shuddered, nodding.

“And… here?” He clasped her breast with his hand, her nipple caught between two of his fingers, making her squirm again.

“Yes, please,” she whined.

He pulled back, standing on the edge of the bed on his knees, and hiked her up the bed. He came back down, his mouth at her breasts. He licked her nipple, pulling it gently into his mouth, painstakingly careful not to scrape her with his fangs. She moaned louder than he expected. I forgot how much she liked that.

He worked his tongue across her nipple, flicking at it with the tip of his tongue, feeling her hips roll underneath him. He moved his head to the other breast and repeated the treatment.

“Ohhh, Lord Astarion, yes,” she whimpered. She was still using his title, playing along. Such a cheeky girl.

He pulled his head away, hearing her whine at the loss. He looked up into her eyes again, seeing them glazed over with lust.

“Shall I touch you here?” he offered, brushing his fingers over her pelvis, eliciting a gasp.

“Yes, yes,” she moaned. “There, please, Lord Astarion.”

“As you wish, my lady.” He crawled down again, his face at her bellybutton, kissing his way down. She tipped her pelvis up at him impatiently. He reached between her legs, finding her entrance and pushing two fingers inside. She was dripping wet. He felt for her most sensitive zone, feeling the taut place at the front and pressing upwards against it. She moaned and stiffened her hips as he touched her there.

Once he was propped on his elbow, he lowered his mouth to her cunt, lapping at her. She let out a surprised whimper, lifting her head to look down at him. He froze, watching her eyes, until she nodded at him. Thank the Gods.

He worked his tongue slowly over her, moving his fingers in rhythm with his mouth. She moaned, higher pitched and more urgently the longer he worked on her. Gods, you’re beautiful, I love you, he thought. He felt his cock pulse, starting to harden again at the temptation, but remained focused on touching her.

“Oh, fuck, Astarion,” she whimpered. “Please don’t stop.”

He shook his head slightly, not lifting his mouth from her body. I’m not stopping unless you say so. He worked faster, hearing her voice cutting out as she moaned his name.

“Oh A- star-” she cried out. “Oh Gods- I’m comi-”

He felt her insides flutter and pulse around his fingers. Oh, fuck. She was so, so hot. He felt himself sweating too, his cheeks and ears slipping against her inner thighs. She panted, trying to catch her breath, so he gave her a short break from the stimulation before starting up again. Her moans resumed, high and urgent, and it took even less time for her to wind up the second time.

“Fucking hells,” she whimpered. “You’re going to make me-”

“Mhm,” he murmured against her cunt, nodding slightly, encouraging her. She cried out, pulsing hard around his fingers again. He felt himself get completely, desperately hard as he listened to her falling apart. Bleeding hells, she is so lovely.

His fingers pushed against the inside of her, realizing the front was more taut and resistant to his touch than before. Suddenly, a few of the times he’d fingered her into oblivion came rushing into his mind. This might make a mess. He wanted her on him so badly, tight like that around his cock. He pulled his head away, keeping his fingers still.

“Marin,” he purred. “My sweet, we should get off the bed. I’m going to get something to put underneath us.”

She nodded, her eyes wide, seemingly having realized it as well. He pulled away from her and grabbed several towels from across the room. He laid them all down, creating thick layers on top of the bedding.

“Will you let me fuck you?” he pleaded, her eyes glancing down to his cock standing at attention.

“Yes,” she panted immediately. “Lay down.”

He laid on his back, positioning his pelvis on top of the towels. She climbed onto the bed and into his lap, holding his cock still so she could sink down onto it. He could feel her all around him, tight and soaking wet. His earlier release would buy him some time. Thank the Gods. The sensation of her was so very overwhelming.

“Oh-h-h,” came her broken moans as she settled onto him. “Astarion-”

“You’re perfect,” he huffed, trying to hold still while she got comfortable. “Absolutely perfect.”

Her cheeks were bright red, the flush spreading like wildfire over her ears and shoulders. She rocked against him, trying to get as close as possible. He put his hands on her hips and pulled her down onto his pelvis, hard. He bounced her on his cock, using his grip to keep her close, watching her tits bounce along. Her mouth was open in a beautiful oval, her eyes rolling upwards behind closed lids. I will not come before her, he thought. I have to give her this. She deserves to be happy. He felt his eyes well slightly at the thought. Gods damn it.

She looked down at him with that doe-eyed face of desperation. She didn’t say a word, but her face gave her away.

“It’s all right, darling. Let go,” he begged, his voice high and breathless. “Come for me, Marin. Mess be damned.”

She kept her eyes locked on his, letting out staccato cries as he felt her waves come crashing down around him. Her eyes slammed shut, barely any sound escaping her, pulsing so hard around his cock as more and more fluid puddled between them, running down over his hips onto the towels below. That’s it. He lost any semblance of control.

“Fuckfuckfuck,” he whimpered and came inside of her. He felt her swaying above him and grabbed her shoulders to guide her down onto his chest. He held her as they both shuddered and caught their breath.

“Astarion,” she mumbled against his neck, her voice muffled.

“Yes, dear.”

“I love you. I never stopped,” she admitted quietly. He stayed silent, holding her tightly, his face solemn. He felt her closed eyelids grow wet against his bare skin. “I don’t even know why I’m crying. I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right, my sweet,” he consoled her. “It’s quite natural to cry after a release like that.”

“All right,” she muttered. Her tears slid down over his shoulder, soaking into the bedding below. His own eyes welled up, knowing their time together was almost over. She’ll be leaving again, and I’ll be here alone. Again.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 3

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1k (chapter 3 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, ex-lovers reunited, forbidden relationship, angst, Marin's husband is emotionally ab*sive, she's in denial and Astarion finds out, protective/angry Astarion, comfort

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

They say your head can be a prison / Then these are just conjugal visits

Marin woke with a start, unsure where she was for a moment. She sat up straight before realizing she was with Astarion. She heard him stir behind her.

“Are you all right?” he mumbled.

“Yes, I was… dreaming, I suppose,” she muttered. “I don't remember.”

“Come back to me,” he implored. She laid down next to him.

“You must have been terribly bored,” she said sheepishly. “I'm sorry.”

“Hm? No, I read my book for a while, and then I rested. I was in a trance until you woke.”

“Oh. I'm sorry,” she repeated.

“Now, stop that, darling,” he scolded gently. “You simply must stop apologizing to me. I'm glad you're here.”

“I'm glad, too,” she replied honestly. “Do you have the time?”

He checked a watchpiece on his side table. “Early. A bit after three.”

“I feel wide awake.” She turned to look at him.

“You did fall asleep quite early,” he chuckled, his eyes soft. “Why, do you want to get up?”

Marin shook her head. “I want to stay here for now.”

“All right, then. Whatever shall we do together, in my bed?” he mused, being cheeky.

“Can we talk?”

Astarion cleared his throat. “Of course.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” she started.

“What do you mean, darling?” Astarion propped himself on his side.

“About… all of this,” she replied. “I thought I could come here, and see you, and then go back home. And then… we’d be even, I suppose. Things would go back to normal.”

Astarion was quiet for a long time. “And why can’t they? Go back to normal, I mean.”

“I don’t want to go back to normal. I feel like I’m in prison,” she muttered. “At home, with him.”

“Perhaps you need regular conjugal visits, then,” he joked.

“I’m serious, Astarion.” She turned to look at him, her face anxious. “Del’s a good man, but… I’m resentful. I feel like a servant.”

“Is he a good man?” he asked, studying her face. “He doesn’t sound like one, though I know I’m not exactly the right person to make a moral judgment.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s sleeping around, with a woman like you waiting at home. How long has he been hiding it from you?”

“Well, it was just the one… that I know of,” Marin said, uneasy. “It was a few months ago. She had just moved into town and didn’t know he was married. She told me a couple of weeks later, when she realized he had a wife.”

“So, he’s had plenty of time to broach the subject,” he mused. “He’s too pathetic to tell you the truth. Or he doesn’t give a damn.”

She felt tears welling up. Gods damn it.

“It’s my fault,” she whispered. “It has to be.”

“How could it be your fault?” he asked quietly. “You’re beautiful, Marin. You’re a loving person. He had no reason to stray, and yet he did.”

“He’s so angry all the time,” she lamented. “I try to do everything just the way he wants me to, and I still fail.”

Astarion gently turned her chin to face him again, looking into her eyes. “What do you mean?”

“His house. His dinner. All his rules. Everything.”

“His house?” he repeated, bristling at her words. “His… rules? What kind of rules?”

“The house has to be spotless when he’s there,” she explained. “I have to do all the cooking. And I have to look nice for him - keep my hair brushed, and wear pretty things when he’s around. Nothing ever looks good enough in his eyes.”

Astarion’s eyes were red like hot coals under his knitted brows. He looked furious now.

“What happens if you don’t… follow his rules?” he growled slowly.

“He yells at me,” she choked out. “Says mean things to me. Calls me names.”

Astarion rolled onto his back, taking deep, shaky breaths.

“And if he finds out I left town, he’ll be-”

“I’ll kill him,” he snarled, staring at the canopy with his jaw clenched. Marin’s heart pounded, her stomach churning. Oh no, what have I done?

“Astarion, what- why are you so angry?” she stuttered, her voice high and quivering.

He softened at once, seemingly realizing he was scaring her. He turned back to her and pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tight.

“I’m sorry, my love,” he whispered into her hair. “I’m so sorry.”

“For what?” she squeaked.

“For frightening you. For everything. I’m so sorry, Marin.”

“What- are you all right?”

“I never should have let you go. I should have begged you to stay here, where I can protect you,” he whispered, sounding almost manic, his arms shaking as he held her. “I thought you’d be safe without me, but-”

“Safe? What are you saying, Astarion?”

He pulled back from her and pressed his forehead to hers, tears in his eyes.

“You protected me from him,” he said, his voice shaking. “Being with you was the first time I felt safe, and you helped me kill him. You gave me what I have.”

“What does any of that have to do with Del?” she asked, bewildered.

“He treats you terribly! He won’t let you leave!” he objected, his voice high and indignant, before lowering back to a growl. “He’s a poisonous little snake. I won’t wait until he bites you to crush him under my heel.”

“Astarion, please don’t talk like that. He doesn’t hurt me. I’m safe.”

“You can’t stay there with a man like that, Marin!” he pleaded, his eyes sharp and fearful. “It will only get worse. Please, let me protect you.”

“I don’t want to talk about this any more right now,” she choked out, holding back tears. “Please, can we just be together for a while longer before I go? Like old times?”

He took a deep breath, and laid quietly for a while, regaining control of himself. Finally, he pulled her close again.

“Of course we can, darling.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 2

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1.2k (chapter 2 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, ex-lovers reunited, forbidden relationship, romantic confession, aftercare, non-sexual nudity/intimacy, angst, regret, jealousy, crying, comfort, fluff, soft Astarion

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Next chapter

“The bath’s ready,” Astarion announced, poking his head around the bedroom door. Marin was already asleep on the edge of the bed, though he'd only been gone a few minutes. “Oh, darling. You must be exhausted. Poor thing.”

“Huh? Oh, sorry,” she mumbled, realizing she'd been asleep. She blinked a few times, clearing the blurriness from her eyes. It had been a terribly long day.

“Don't be. Let's get cleaned up, and you can rest all you want afterwards, hm?” Astarion said softly, extending a hand to help her rise.

The bath was exquisite - a huge wooden tub, filled with warm, delicately scented water and flower petals floating on the top.

“Now, there's room for the both of us in here, but I can wash up elsewhere if you'd like your privacy. Your decision,” Astarion offered.

“Stay,” Marin responded. “I think I'd fall asleep in there, to be honest.”

Astarion chuckled. “As you wish, my dear.”

He helped her lift her dress up over her head, and then took off the tight pants he'd been wearing. He took both piles of clothes, including their undergarments, and placed them in the hall.

“What are you doing?” Marin blurted out.

“Leaving them for my housekeeper. I let her know we'd need yours cleaned for tomorrow.”

“Including my underclothes? Oh, gods, with the mess we made… how mortifying.” She felt a blush spreading down to her bare shoulders.

“I met Evi when she worked in a brothel,” Astarion said with a smirk. “She gets far better wages to clean that sort of mess now. Don't be embarrassed.”

Marin’s face was burning at the thought, but she slipped her leg into the bath without argument.

“Ohhh, it's perfect,” she sighed, climbing in and submerging herself to the chin. Astarion followed suit, sinking down next to her facing the same direction.

“Mmm, yes, it is,” he agreed. They sat together in silence for a while.

“I could take a bath like this every single night,” Marin said absentmindedly.

“You could, if you wanted to,” Astarion responded earnestly. “You can stay here anytime.”

She wasn't sure what to say to that. She kept her eyes closed, completely flushed, turning his words over in her mind: I love you. Was that just one of his charming lines? Does he say that a lot?

“Did you fall asleep?” he asked, pulling her back into the moment. Her eyes sprang open.

“Hm? Uh, maybe.”

“You poor, sweet thing,” Astarion sympathized, his voice like honey. How do I ask him about that? Is there a tactful way to broach the subject?

“Did you mean it?” she blurted out. So much for tact, Marin.

“Hm?”

“When you… uh, never mind,” she muttered. He straightened up a bit, stiffening his posture as he guessed her intentions.

“You mean when we were having sex?”

Leave it to Astarion to find the most uncomfortable way to hold a mirror to your own face. Is he embarrassed too? It's so hard to tell.

“Yeah.”

He sighed, pondering it for a moment before he spoke again. “Well, I suppose I meant it at the time.”

“What does that even mean?” Marin asked, a bit too harshly.

“It was the heat of the moment, darling. A force of habit,” he admitted. Her stomach dropped.

“Yeah, I'll bet you say that to everyone who lets you put your cock in them,” she replied bitterly.

“To everyone? Certainly not, dear,” he snapped, a bit of offense in his voice.

“Then why'd you say it was a habit?”

“From when I was with you, back then,” he clarified. “I used to tell you that all the time. The body remembers things like that.”

She looked away, ashamed for having been so short with him. What in the hells was that? Am I jealous? Of Astarion?

“Are you all right, Marin?” he asked, softly. “You're not upset with me for having sex with other people, surely. Was I meant to remain celibate in your absence?”

She felt tears welling up. She didn't speak, trying to push them back down before he noticed.

“Marin?”

“I'm jealous, okay?” she blurted out. “It's stupid, and it doesn't make any sense, but I am.”

“It's not stupid,” he responded. “Another man gets to hear you say ‘I love you’ while he beds you, year after year. While I'm here in this empty place, alone. Sensible or not, I know how it feels.”

“You're not here alone,” she replied, her words coming out grumpier than intended. “That's ridiculous. I'm sure you've fucked all manner of noblemen, and their wives too.”

“I didn't say my bed was cold, darling,” he sniped. “And besides, that's hardly the same. They were just sex. Distractions, as you mentioned earlier. Elves fall in love once or twice in a long lifetime, or have you forgotten?”

It was no use trying to hold the tears back anymore. They came streaming down her face, stinging her red cheeks and dripping into the bathwater. He put a hand on the side of her face, turning her head towards him, his fingers finally warm.

“What are you crying for? I didn't…” he trailed off. “I was too harsh. I'm sorry, my sweet.”

“No, that's not-” she sobbed, trying to catch her breath. “I haven't felt- I don't- I'm s-sorry-” The thoughts she tried to hold together kept slipping through her fingers.

Astarion pulled her close, bare chest pressed against hers, his wet curls touching the side of her face.

“You're not to blame for my loneliness, dear,” he consoled her, petting her hair. “I was the one who pushed you away by acting like a bastard, and I've been reckoning with that for a long time now. It's nothing new for me.”

“Well, who's to blame for my loneliness, then?” she blubbered.

“Your cheating husband. Your selfish vampire. Take your pick.”

“He's not a bad guy. And neither are you. There must be something wrong with me,” she lamented. He pulled back and held her shoulders, taking a better look at her.

“There’s nothing wrong with you, Marin. Let's get you to bed, okay? You'll feel better.”

She nodded, her tears slowing. He stood and got out of the bath, drying himself with a towel before helping her up. He gave her the towel to wrap around herself while they crossed the hall. Her body felt so heavy and cumbersome.

They stepped out of the steamy bathroom, the dirty clothes now missing from the hall. He kept his arm around her shoulders, guiding her back to his bedroom.

Marin sat down on the edge of the bed, feeling woozy, while Astarion hunted through the wardrobe. He returned to her with a nightshirt and some of his underclothes.

“Wear these for tonight,” he said softly. He pulled down the bedding while she dressed, making a comfortable space for her to lay down. She obliged, curling up on her side. She felt him crawl into bed behind her, pulling her into the crook of his body.

“You don't sleep,” she mumbled.

“I'll stay with you anyway,” he whispered in her ear. “I’ll be here when you wake, all right?”

She nodded as she drifted off.

“Now rest, darling.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 1

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Overview: I was inspired by an old favorite song - The Take Over, The Break's Over by Fall Out Boy. I really wanted to make a story about a protective A!Astarion reuniting with his ex-lover who has a shit husband and it became a WAY longer story than I intended. Super smutty and quite heavy throughout. Astarion's PTSD and Marin's emotionally ab*sive husband are triggers later on!

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 3.7k (chapter 1 of 17)

Setting: Baldur's Gate, post-plot of BG3

Content: Marin's POV, ex-lovers reunited, forbidden relationship, semi-public make-out, dirty talk, hook-up, fingering, quickie, standing/wall sex, romantic confession, soft Ascended Astarion is lonely

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

Next chapter

Don't pretend you ever forgot about me

Marin arrived at the bar in the early evening, the fourth place she'd checked for Astarion. The servant at his front door said he went out for drinks and wasn't expected back for several hours, but she couldn't afford to wait in his sitting room for him to come home. Instead, she went searching for Astarion at the fancy establishments near his home, despite the sprinkling rain. As she stepped past the entranceway of the tavern, she spotted him from behind.

There he was, perched on a small chair like a peacock, gesturing as he spoke. A nobleman sat across from him, drunkenly laughing at his story, a courtesan giggling between the two. She was leaning against the other man, but clearly enraptured by Astarion. Marin could hardly blame her - the other man was likely a well-paying client, but nowhere near as charming.

Time seemed to stand still. The drunken man must have noticed her standing across the room, staring at the group of them, and smiled in her direction. Trying to figure out what he was looking at, the woman ended up spotting her as well. She smiled and gave a little wave to Marin.

Astarion glanced over his shoulder, his characteristic smirk still plastered on his face. It quickly dropped when he saw Marin. He didn't look upset, to her relief. His eyes were wide, lips slightly parted. He furrowed his brow and squinted a little, as if he couldn't believe his eyes.

“... Marin?”

Her heart raced hearing her name from his mouth again.

“Astarion.”

He'd completely lost interest in the others at his table, rising slowly from his chair. He strode elegantly across the bar, despite his surprise.

“Bleeding hells. It's actually you,” Astarion said, his mouth breaking into a genuine smile. “What are you doing here?”

“I thought we could have a drink,” she responded, trying to keep her voice from shaking. “The two of us. Catch up.”

Astarion's brows knitted together in disbelief, but he played along regardless. “All right, then. Let's have a drink.”

He extended an arm, offering it to her like a gentleman. She took it, tighter than she intended. Without missing a beat, he led her across the floor, walking all the way to the back of the establishment. He presented her with a pair of comfortable armchairs, waiting for her to sit before sinking into one himself, signalling for a waiter.

“Wine for you, darling?”

Marin’s stomach jumped at the pet name.

“Liquor,” she replied, trying to sound composed. He perked an eyebrow with curiosity, but didn't challenge her. He turned to the waiter who had appeared.

“Brandy, for both of us. Thank you,” he requested, before turning back to Marin.

“Sooo, you know I must ask. What brings a married woman into a bar for a drink with her old lover?” he drawled. “I hadn’t the faintest clue you were in town.”

“I wanted to see you,” she replied, earnestly.

“After all these years?” he asked with surprise, watching her carefully. “Obviously, darling, I'm flattered. But I thought you were finished with me.”

“I don't hate you. I never did,” she countered. “It was just too hard to be… close to you, after everything that happened. And then I met Del.”

“Yes, Wyll told me you were leaving town to get married. I assumed that was the end of it. Of us.” His tone was still calm and measured, despite the subject.

The drinks arrived, and Marin immediately took hers from the table. She took a big drink, hoping to steel her nerves, and coughed a little. Damn, it's been a long time since I had something this strong, she thought. How embarrassing. She looked up to see Astarion smiling at her.

“You're cute, you know that?” Astarion mused, admiringly. “I have missed you, dear. Despite myself.”

“Did you really?” she asked, being cheeky despite her nerves. “I thought a lordship would have plenty of distractions. Especially one as handsome as you.”

Astarion tipped his head back with genuine laughter.

“Distractions, certainly. You wouldn't believe the parties,” he purred. “That doesn't mean I haven't missed our… little talks.”

He looked as beautiful as he always had. No, even better. Years of luxury and rest seemed to have helped his skin. The dark circles and fine lines had eased slightly since their adventuring days. She blushed at the realization, hoping she hadn't aged too noticeably in his eyes.

“So, darling, how long are you in town?” Astarion asked, snapping her out of her own thoughts.

“Well, I need to be home tomorrow to prepare the house. My husband will be home from his trip tomorrow night, and I need to get it fixed up for him.”

He furrowed his brow. “Why do you have to fix up the house for your husband?”

“Not all of us have servants to clean up and cook dinner,” she scoffed, teasing him. “I have to do that stuff myself. He expects it to be perfect when he’s around.”

Astarion stared at her suspiciously, looking like he wanted to press it further, but he dropped the subject. “Well, then. Dinner?”

She shook her head. “I thought maybe I could see your home,” she chirped. “I went there first. It looks great. I haven't been there since…” Marin trailed off, realizing what she was saying. Since I helped you kill Cazador.

“Yes, it's changed a lot,” Astarion responded, steering the conversation. “Obviously, with the city in such a state, it was hard to get repairs done. Things have quieted down, though.”

The two stared at each other for a moment.

“Well then, shall we take a little walk?” Astarion said, rising from his chair and extending a hand to her. “I believe the rain has slowed since I arrived, so it should be rather pleasant.”

Marin accepted his hand and stood as well, swaying a tiny bit. Hells, that drink went to my head more than I expected, she thought. Astarion was gracious, offering his elbow for her to grip and walk with him. He led her across the bar, collecting their cloaks at the door.  His was a fine garment meant to protect his expensive suit from the elements. Her simple traveling cloak looked very plain by comparison.

Outside, the soft pattering of rain set a very different tone from the warm, crowded tavern. The streets were fairly empty, aside from a few carriages passing by. Most people were indoors after sunset on a rainy evening.

“I have a confession to make,” Marin admitted.

“I knew it,” came Astarion’s smug voice from beside her. “There's more to this, isn't there?”

“I didn't come here to ask you for money, if that's what you're implying,” she hissed. “I did come to see you.”

“Why would you want to see me, darling? Not only for a free brandy and idle chatter, I hope,” he sneered. “Perhaps to see the look of shock on my face in a crowded bar? To taunt me for my loneliness, despite my hedonistic life? To remind me of what I'm missing?”

Marin stopped and turned to look at him. “I didn't come here to taunt you. I'm not that kind of person.”

“I know that, dear,” he said, a bit exasperated. “I'm just trying to understand why a good girl with a loving husband would track down an old flame.”

“He's not that loving,” Marin snapped, starting to walk again. “Can you stop being a prick?”

Astarion snorted. “Not really, no,” he responded playfully. “What-”

She surprised him into silence, pulling him down a secluded alleyway with a jerk. She pulled him to face her and clumsily kissed him on the cheek, too close to his mouth for a friendly greeting.

“What in the- Marin, are you feeling alright?”

Instead of answering, she grabbed the lapels of his suit and kissed him again, this time on the mouth. He didn't protest.

“There. Is that clear enough for you?” she huffed. Astarion watched her face carefully, thinking before he spoke.

“You're not drunk,” he started, slowly. I forgot he can smell my blood. “You're not joking, either. You came all the way to Baldur's Gate, just to see me? To… be with me?”

“You used to say you were always up for ‘a sordid little affair’ after we broke up,” Marin sniped, mimicking his accent. “What’s the problem?”

“Well, naturally, I am,” he drawled. “But I didn't think you were the type to take me up on it.”

“Maybe I've changed!” she snapped. “It's been a long time since you knew me. Is that really so hard to believe?”

“Yes, it is, dear.”

“This was a mistake,” Marin huffed with frustration. She turned to leave, but he kept a gentle grip on her forearm.

“Please, don't go,” he said, his voice softening. “I was only trying to help. I don't want you to run off just yet.”

She stopped, still turned away from him. She didn’t really want to leave, but her face burned with embarrassment.

“I was trying to protect you. I didn’t want you to make a mistake and… regret me,” he admitted. “I’m sure you already do.”

Marin turned back to him, her brows knitted with uncertainty. How much do I share? Will he think I’m a fool?

“Del slept with somebody else,” she blurted out, staring at the pavement. “So I stopped fighting my urge to come back here. To see you. I thought about it for a long time.”

“I presume… it wasn’t a planned arrangement, then?” he asked gently.

“No. He fucked some other woman for no reason at all,” she hissed, fighting back tears. “He doesn’t even know that I found out. I’m sure he thinks he’s rather clever.”

Astarion took her hand in his. They both stood silently for a long time, with light rain hitting the pavement as the only sound.

“I don’t want you to make a mistake,” he said earnestly. “But I’ll have you, darling. If this is truly what you want.”

“Yes, it is,” Marin responded without hesitation.

Astarion’s eyes searched her face cautiously, looking for any hint of doubt or regret. He moved closer, his eyes locked on hers, gently backing her up against the bricks behind her. She stared up at him, holding her breath, exhilarated from how close he was. His eyes gleamed a deep garnet in the growing darkness, his gaze now fixed on her lips. The damp wall was cold against her back.

He put a hand behind her head and kissed her, his chilled fingers at the nape of her neck making her shiver. Marin leaned deeper into the kiss, poking his lips ever so slightly with her tongue. He responded with his own tongue in her mouth, and before long, they were kissing messily like a pair of horny fools. She rubbed up against him with her hips, feeling the outline of his cock press against her. He inhaled at the sensation, grinding himself against her, his hands on her waist to hold her close. He moved one hand down to her ass, grabbing at her and eliciting a muffled moan.

“Gods, I’ve missed you,” he panted. “I’d forgotten how much until I saw you.”

“And you still know how to drive me wild,” she whispered.

She reached down between them, feeling the firm outline of his cock. His pants were perfectly form-fitting and made of a silky material. They can’t be very comfortable, but Gods damn it, they look so good on him. She felt him pulse at her touch, looking up to find his eyes had gone glazed over, almost feral.

“Just don’t bite me, okay? I can’t go home with a mark like that.”

“As much as I’d love to, I was thinking of something else,” he responded. He snaked a hand down the front of her body, grasping between her legs. Marin gasped, tipping her pelvis forward into his hand instinctively. He wouldn’t have any access through her long dress, at least not without a serious adjustment. Why did I wear this thing?

Astarion seemed to wrest control of himself with great effort, straightening up and pulling away from her with a deep breath. She whined at the loss.

“I don’t want any interruptions, darling,” he whispered. “It’d be a little unseemly to go any farther right here. People know me in this part of town.”

He once again offered her his arm, and she clung to him as they walked. The rain had started picking up again, and they both pulled up the hoods of their cloaks to keep dry.

“Do you know what I’d like to do with you, Marin?” Astarion mused quietly. “I would love to push you up against that wall and take you, here and now. Rain and reputation be damned.”

“I can’t imagine,” she responded, teasing him. “You’ll have to paint the picture a little more clearly for me.” He chuckled, realizing her game.

“Well, it would start with a kiss, just like that one. Our bodies pressed close together, and our hands on each other. Perhaps I’d touch you where it was sure to drive you wild. And perhaps you’d let me know how much you wanted it, and beg me to take you right then.”

She hummed as if she were pondering the scenario, her face scarlet.

“And after such an intriguing request from such a beautiful woman, well…” he paused. “I’d have no choice but to oblige. I’d hike up your dress and pick you up, both of your legs to one side.”

“Would you, now?” She was playing coy, despite how badly she wanted to hear the rest of his story. “And why is that?”

“So that I could pull your underclothes down over your ankles like the naughty little thing you are. Then I’d wrap your bare legs around me and pull your hips close, letting you feel just how badly I’ve missed you. How long I’ve missed you.”

She giggled at his double entendre.

“You’d be so close to my cock, and so ready to take it. I couldn’t resist you after that, naturally,” he whispered as they walked up the path. “I’d have to have you,”

Marin sucked in a breath, realizing she’d been captivated by his description for several blocks. They were nearly to the looming entrance of his palace. He stopped short of the front step to whisper in her ear.

“Of course, it’s all hypothetical, darling. I’m a gentleman, after all.” She snorted at the assertion as he stepped up and knocked, announcing himself.

The servant who had greeted Marin earlier opened the door. “Good evening, my lord. Ah, I see you found each other!” she said, recognizing his companion. “What good fortune.”

They stepped over the entranceway into the lavish home. “Thank you, Evi. You may retire for the evening,” Astarion said with a smile, his tone even.

“Thank you, my lord,” she responded cheerfully, hanging their damp cloaks on hooks. She glanced once more at Marin before heading down a nearby hallway.

“I only have two of them here unless I’m hosting,” he explained. “Their quarters are below the main floor. They won’t bother us.” He must have seen the unease on her face. He snaked an arm behind her waist and led her to the staircase.

“Or hear us, no matter how loud we are,” he added quietly. Her face burned fiercely at the very thought. “Now, let’s get upstairs and out of these wet clothes. There will be time to explore later.”

Astarion led her up the stairs with a haste she hadn’t seen from him that evening. He seemed to drop his gentlemanly demeanor more with every passing second, his excitement becoming more apparent. She followed him without a word. Several floors up, they reached a room at the end of a long hallway.

He swung the door open a little too hard, drawing her in behind him. He shut the heavy wooden door and pushed her up against it. Holy hells. She’d forgotten how fast he could move when he felt like it. Despite her pounding heart, she held her breath, noticing his eyes locked on hers again. They were ruby red in the candlelight, and hungry, like the bloodthirsty predator he was.

“Oh, Astarion,” she blurted out, stunned by the intensity of his gaze.

“This is still what you want, my dear?” he whispered, breathless and deadly serious.

“Yes. Gods, yes,” Marin replied immediately.

And with that, he dropped all pretense, kissing her like they’d resumed exactly where they left off. He pressed his hips against her body, his tight pants giving away how completely hard he was already. His little story on the way home hadn’t been only for her entertainment, apparently.

“You’re so hard,” she whined, grinding her hips against him.

“Of course I am,” he huffed. “You’re here, in my bedroom, after all this time.”

He reached his hand down and grabbed between her legs once more, the thick fabric of her dress in the way.

“Now, that won’t do,” he growled. He took her by the hips and moved her to the four-poster bed, gently pushing her down on her back. He hurriedly undid the buttons on his suit coat, and then his undershirt, before throwing both across the room. Marin watched his every move, her eyes wide. He always looks so good with his chest bare, Gods damn him. Same as he always did. He unfastened his terribly tight pants, adjusting his cock without exposing himself.

“Bleeding hells, that’s better,” he groaned. “It was getting painful.”

Marin let out a tiny giggle at his honesty. He hiked up her dress and kneeled in front of her, pulling at her wet underclothes. He got them down over her ankles and returned his attention to her, his cold, nimble hands snaking up her thighs. She shivered beneath his touch.

“You are… so beautiful,” he managed, trying to control himself as his fingers reached her hips. He met her gaze, an unspoken question on his mind. He was still careful about consent after all this time, no matter how mad he was with lust.

“Yes, Astarion,” she panted desperately. “Yes, please, touch me.”

He moved his hand quickly to comply. First one finger was inside, then another, searching for the spot that made her wild. He found it with a few strokes, making her hips tilt forward in surprise.

“Oh, Gods,” Marin whined, letting her head fall back on the soft bedding. She felt every ounce of tension melt in an instant, and then slowly return. His fingers beckoned inside of her, making her absent-mindedly wiggle closer to the edge of the bed, seeking more. His other hand was flat on top of her pelvis, applying gentle pressure to increase the stimulation inside, with his thumb rubbing at her clit. The combination of his movements was completely overwhelming, emptying her mind of anything else. Every bit of her attention was focused where his deft hands met her body, inside and out. She felt a hot wave of pleasure move slowly up her entire core. More and more waves followed, and she felt the pitch of her moans rising unintentionally. Oh, hells, here we go.

Marin finally perked her head off the bed to look down at him, his forehead dripping with sweat, eyes transfixed on his work. Astarion heard her move and glanced up to see her, doe-eyed and gasping.

“Oh, Astarion,” she whimpered. “I’m so close, I’m going to- ohhh-”

“Come for me,” he purred, enjoying the show. “Come, darling.”

Her thighs quivered, hips thrusting upwards as she reached her peak, crying out loudly as she tumbled down over the edge. As soon as she relaxed her hips, she felt his hands pull away from her. Marin propped herself up on her elbows to look down at him. He had pulled his cock out and was using his hand, still slick from touching her, to cover himself with some oil he’d grabbed.

Before she could say a word, he yanked her to the edge of the bed by her dress, wrapping an arm firmly behind her waist and pulling her up. She did her best to hold on as he stood up, her arms and legs wrapped around his bare torso, despite how weak and useless her muscles felt. He backed her up against the door, his cock touching the back of her thigh, her dress draped over where their bodies met.

“Ready?” he panted. She nodded eagerly, and he reached up under the fabric and guided his cock to her entrance, pushing inside of her. He groaned from the relief as he worked her smoothly down his own length, propping her on his hips. He put one arm out straight against the door to steady himself, the other wrapped around her waist to keep her close to him. He thrusted into her, making contact with her most sensitive spots and making her cry out.

“Oh, hells, Marin,” he whined at her. “You are perfect.”

“Oh, Astarion,” she moaned. “Oh, fuck me!”

“I will,” he grunted, trying to get even deeper. She could hear her back bumping clumsily against the heavy wooden door as he thrusted into her. She felt a hot ball of pleasure building in her chest, bouncing along with her tits and intensifying quickly.

“Oh, fuck! Fuck, fuck!” she cried out, ignoring the racket they must be making by this point. She could hear rhythmic moans rising from his throat as he slammed into her.

“Oh, I’m close, darling,” he panted, his voice higher-pitched and desperate now. “Please come for me, Marin, please- I ca- can’t stop-”

She felt the ball of pleasure explode behind her sternum like a firework, her mouth open wide, voice cracking as she cried out. He let himself loose as he felt her coming around his cock, falling apart, banging her back against the door, hard.

“Oh, Marin, I- love you s-” Astarion whimpered as he came. Her eyes went huge at his admission. She felt him go weak under her weight, and he slid slowly to the ground, careful not to let her fall. He landed on his knees and slumped all the way down, Marin still planted firmly on his hips with her back resting against the door. His head fell forward onto her shoulder, exhausted, his chest heaving.

I made a podfic for this!

Voice acted, read word for word, no sound effects outside of vocal tone to reflect the text

Files for the full version, and both parts separately, on my Google Drive (.wav files)

All of it was recorded and edited by me - a novice without a great audio setup, but I did my best to make it listenable and pleasant. Please enjoy!

Astarion's Forest Scene M4F/NB

Overview: I wanted to write a retelling of Astarion's first romance scene from a positive angle, rather than assuming his initial interest is all a ruse because he has trauma. I like the idea of him reinterpreting his past through a new lens early on and grappling with that. The first chunk is an extension/reimagining of the sexual part we see a bit of in-game, and the second chunk is an idea of the time in between the sex scene and the morning scene: Tav's asleep, and Astarion is in his head about the past. Just be aware there are non-specific mentions, mainly in the second part, of his life with Cazador, and some PTSD symptoms.

Astarion x Tav (gender neutral, they/them, AFAB/female anatomy)

Rating: Explicit (18+) Words: 3.3k Setting: Private forest clearing, after the tiefling party Content: Astarion POV, mlw/mlnb, hook-up, oral sex, PIV sex, biting, blood drinking, PTSD comfort, cuddling

Gender neutral but there's both a male- and female-bodied version of this; I couldn't decide because I'm too bi to function tysm for your understanding~

AMAB Tav / M4M version

“There you are.”

Astarion watched Tav’s head whip around in surprise at the sound of his voice. Good, he thought. He needed them a little off-balance to keep the upper hand.

“I've been waiting,” Astarion growled, drawing closer to his mark, his opening lines rehearsed. “Waiting since the moment I set eyes on you. Waiting… to have you.”

Tav raised their eyebrows as he sauntered towards them. He could smell their blood more and more, metallic and sweet, with just a hint of alcohol left. They were still a little tipsy from the party, but not drunk. He heard their heartbeat quicken.

“Well, here I am,” Tav chuckled nervously.

Luring them away from the party had been simple enough. Laying on the charm had done the trick - a few perfect lines, a pouty gaze, a calculated brush of the hand. Astarion knew from the look in their eyes earlier that he'd won, but it was a nice confirmation to see them now.

Astarion reached for one of Tav’s hands and closed the distance between them. He pressed his other hand behind the small of their back to pull them in for a firm kiss. The warmth of their body against his was invigorating.

Tav melted into the kiss, allowing their hips to make contact. He moved his free hand to the back of their neck and tilted his head deeper into the kiss, their quiet groans stifled by his lips.

Finally, Astarion pulled back and pricked his face into a lopsided smile, regaining control of the situation.

“Gods, you're eager,” he purred. Tav's eyes flicked to the ground, eyebrows knitting with uncertainty. He hooked a finger under their chin to reassure them. “I like it.”

Tav met his gaze again, a small smile appearing on their face. “I suppose I was eager enough that I didn't… ask many questions. About you.”

Astarion’s stomach clenched, unsure of what to expect. “About me?”

“Yes, well… what you had planned for us tonight,” Tav said shyly, looking again at the ground. “Your… preferences. That sort of thing.”

“I've done it all, practically,” Astarion chuckled with relief. Perhaps a bit arrogant, but he was trying to gauge their reaction. “I can be whatever you want me to be.”

Tav met his eyes again.

“I want you to be yourself,” they said earnestly.

Astarion felt a catch in his throat and swallowed against it. He couldn't think of a clever quip to respond to that.

“I really want to relax tonight, after all this,” Tav went on. Oh, thank the gods, Astarion thought. They were back in his comfort zone - sex, not emotions.

“I'm just a little…” their words trailed off.

“Afraid to turn your back on a vampire?” Astarion joked. Tav let out a surprised laugh, loud and genuine. Gods, they’re adorable.

“You don't need to worry about a thing,” he said, regaining a more serious tone. “I’ll let you set the pace, darling.”

Tav flashed that sweet smile again, leaning in for a kiss. They were more self-assured this time, placing their hands on Astarion's narrow hips and pushing against him of their own accord, trying to get a feel for him through his pants. He inhaled sharply at the sensation, breaking from their kiss and grinding against them. Tav responded with a little moan, deep in their throat.

“I'll bet you look even prettier under your clothes,” Astarion whispered in their ear, eliciting a gasp. “Perhaps I could see you, to confirm.”

“Perhaps.” Tav untucked their shirt, inviting him closer to their skin. He pulled them in for another kiss, leaning back against a big tree. Astarion’s hand moved down between them, sliding under their shirt. He could feel the heat radiating from their core and knew his hand must be cool against their skin. He worked carefully up over their belly to their chest, feeling their breathing speed up in response to his touch.

Instead of undergarments, his fingers grazed the underside of Tav’s bare breasts. He pulled back from their lips a bit, watching as they smiled and flushed at his surprise.

“What an unexpected treat,” Astarion purred, his fingers moving across their smooth breasts before kissing them again. He gently pawed at them, feeling his own cock pulse in response. Tav gasped a bit, excited at the prospect.

Astarion felt their hands move down and tug at the shirt separating them. He moved out of the way as they pulled it up over their head. He stared admiringly for a moment.

“Gods, I was right. Look at you,” Astarion whispered.

Tav moved in for another kiss, their breasts rubbing against his own bare torso. They feel heavenly, he thought, wrapped up in the sensation. He snaked his hand down their belly and over the outside of their pants, pausing briefly to wait for an objection before feeling between their legs.

A quiet moan escaped Tav’s lips. They thrusted towards him a little, their body close enough Astarion could hear their heart pounding. Gods, their blood must be so hot right now.

“I want your cock,” Tav managed amidst their rising intensity. “I want to see you. Touch you.”

Astarion moved his hands to his own waistband, pulling his weapon free, watching their eyes widen at its appearance.

“Oh,” Tav blurted out. Astarion smirked, unphased. He knew he was beautiful. If he was anything, he was that.

After a second to register the new development, Tav reached for him. Their hand was so warm and soft against his skin. Astarion relaxed as they took him in their hand, letting out a sigh of pleasure.

To his surprise, Tav shifted to kneel on the ground. They met his gaze, searching for his permission to act. Taken aback, all Astarion could do was nod, watching as Tav tenderly kissed his hip, and then his cock. They parted their soft lips and licked at him. It had been a long time since anyone did this for him. Normally, he was the one on his knees, eager, convincing, charming.

Tav opened their mouth and surrounded him, sucking him off. Oh, hells, that feels good. He leaned his head back on the tree, his mind gone blank. Their mouth was so hot and smooth inside. He felt their tongue lapping at the underside of his cock as they worked.

Shit. He needed to regain control of the situation. Recall the mission at hand. Gods above, it was difficult. He put a hand to their cheek and they looked up, pulling their head away from him.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes, I just…” Words were evading him. Shit. “Come back up here.”

“Was it good?” Tav asked genuinely, standing to meet him again. “You seem a little-”

Astarion put his finger to their lips, quieting them. He put a hand in their damp hair, and kissed them, hard. He needed them to swoon, to cede control, to let him perform.

Mission accomplished. He felt them melt into him once more, his exposed cock poking at their smooth belly.

“I want to make you feel good, darling,” Astarion whispered, his lips brushing against their ear. “Tonight is for the both of us.”

Tav shivered as he spoke, nodding. He took them by the shoulders and switched them against the tree in his place. He kissed down the side of their neck, to their collarbone and breasts. Astarion took one of their nipples in his mouth and sucked, carefully avoiding contact with his fangs as he did. He could feel them swaying, pressing into him, moaning softly, their heartbeat pounding in his ears.

Astarion moved to his knees, tugging at their waistband and working their pants off. He kissed across their hip bone, mirroring their own actions, slowly working his mouth closer to the center of their pelvis. Tav gasped and wiggled with anticipation.

His mouth finally reached their cunt, where he ran his tongue slowly across, making them shudder. Astarion's right hand snaked up the inside of Tav’s thigh until he reached between their legs, feeling them from below. They're so hot and wet, Gods above. The excitement travelled down through his core and he felt his cock pulse in response.

He looked up at them from where he sat, checking their expression again before sliding a finger inside. Astarion had carefully tended to his hands and nails earlier in the evening, not wanting his claws to interfere. He saw Tav's mouth drop open as he felt for their most sensitive area. He found it with several strokes, giving slight resistance to his touch from inside and making their eyes widen. He joined his finger with a second and put his mouth back to their cunt, lapping at the front of them while he worked.

Astarion closed his eyes and focused on making Tav feel good, using their moans and shallow breaths as guidance. Their pelvis jutted against his mouth as they grew louder.

“That feels amazing,” Tav whimpered. “Oh, Gods, I love it.”

He worked them inside and out with a bit more vigor, glancing up to see their expression. Their head was leaned back against the tree, mouth open and panting. Excellent.

“You look so beautiful,” he purred.

Tav looked down at him, eyelids fluttering. Astarion could feel their thighs and hips begin to shudder. Perfect.

“Oh, I'm-” Tav choked out, eyes widening urgently. “Don't stop, I'm close to-”

Astarion worked even more feverishly, using his tongue and fingers in harmony as they thrusted at him.

“Oh, fuck!” Tav cried out, louder than he expected. He felt their hips jolt towards his face, their cunt pulsing around his fingers. He felt his cock pulse in response, longing to take their place inside.

Tav's thighs relaxed and he felt them start to slide down the tree. He used his shoulder to brace them from between their legs, grabbing onto their hip with his free hand.

“Careful, darling!” Astarion chuckled breathlessly. “A fall would ruin the fun, now wouldn't it?”

He freed himself from between their legs, standing to hold them up while they caught their breath.

“Shall we lay down? Will you be alright without my help?” Astarion asked after a moment. Tav nodded eagerly. He let go and laid out the linen sheet he'd brought along.

“It's not much, but it should keep the dirt off,” he chuckled, eliciting a smile from Tav. They laid down on their side facing away from him, thighs shivering with anticipation. Astarion followed their lead, laying behind them and pulling them into the crook of his body. Such a nice ass.

He disrobed and reached behind himself for the oil he'd brought, Tav peering back at him over their shoulder. He got the bottle open with his teeth and used his free hand to cover his cock thoroughly with the contents. He used the oiled hand to prep them as well, though it wasn’t necessary. They were nearly dripping from before.

“Are you ready?” Astarion asked quietly, knowing what they would answer.

“Yes,” came Tav’s shaky voice back at him. “Gods, yes. Start slow, okay?”

“Of course, darling,” he purred into their ear. “I'll take good care of you.”

Astarion gently pushed their top leg forward with his knee. He put his cock against their most delicate skin, feeling how desperately wet they were before gently pushing inside. Tav gasped and Astarion gave them a moment to settle before pushing himself further in. He kept his hips restrained, moving slowly until he felt Tav's pelvis melt back into his own.

He wrapped his fingers around their hips, pulling them as close to him as possible. They let out a breathy moan, relaxed and open. He rocked forward into them, feeding off their little sounds of pleasure as he fucked them. So smooth and warm. What a nice cunt. He closed his eyes and rested his slick forehead between their shoulder blades.

“Gods, you're so lovely,” Astarion panted at their back. “Oh, darling, you feel amazing.”

“You feel so- oh, so good,” Tav whined, their speech broken up by ragged breaths. “You- oh, Astarion!”

Something tugged uncomfortably in his chest. It had been a while since he’d heard his name said like that. Usually, he avoided giving it out or just lied, trying to avoid attaching his real name to a reputation for luring people into dark alleys. Many people didn't care enough to ask his name at all.

He let them do the work for a moment, grinding their hips back into him as he turned the thought over and over in his head. His mind raced with fragments of nights before.

“Astarionnn,” Tav whimpered, drawing out his name and snapping him back into the moment. “Fuck, you feel so- I’m close-”

Astarion gripped their sides and tilted their hips closer to the ground, using his knee to open their legs wider. Their back arched, pelvis grinding hard against his as they let out broken sounds.

“Ast- oh, I'm- I'm coming,” Tav cried out urgently. He slammed into them, rocking his hips but staying inside as they whimpered and got off. He could feel their heart, smell their blood. Oh, shit. His body suddenly ached with hunger.

“Oh, gods, that was…” Tav glanced back at him as they caught their breath. “Did you…?”

Astarion shook his head, staring blankly down at their skin instead of meeting their gaze. Their scent filled his mind, his stomach aching with the temptation.

Tav’s eyebrows knitted in concern, realizing he'd lost focus. “Are you alright?”

“Your body- I'm starving,” he blurted out. Why in the hells did I say it like that?

“Oh, I thought you… I thought maybe you weren't enjoying it,” Tav said, still panting. “You can have my blood. Whatever you need.”

Astarion's inhibitions melted in an instant. He bit down into their soft, tender neck, feeling their heart pump feverishly as he drank, his hips moving without thinking. The second taste was just as heavenly as the first had been, days before. Mixed with lust and self-satisfaction over his victory, it was nearly overwhelming.

As his hunger eased, he felt his arousal intensify. He started thrusting deep into Tav, hearing them cry out in response. His movements grew more urgent as he felt his self-control slipping. Oh, shit. He restrained his own movements, delaying the inevitable, and reached in front of Tav, using his fingers to work them where they were most sensitive. Panting and whining, Tav pushed their pelvis against his to get as much contact as possible.

“Oh, fuck me!” Tav cried out, gasping for air. “Oh, Astarion! I'm- hahhh-” He felt them pulse around his cock as he’d hoped, the sensation enough to drive him mad.

That was all the self-control he had left. He drank from them needily, breathing spottily, thrusting urgently. He groaned from the very bottom of his chest and came, hard, still latched onto Tav’s neck and buried deep inside of them.

Astarion’s hips and jaw relaxed and he flopped onto his back, panting so hard it made his head light. When he gained the self-awareness to check in with Tav, he saw them on their back, chest rising slower. They gazed over at him, eyelids soft and a little smile on their face.

“That was amazing,” they whispered.

“Yes, it was,” he puffed, still coming down from his own high.

After a few moments of silence, Tav spoke again.

“Astarion… I care about you.”

Oh, shit.

~~~~~

In the early hours of the morning, Astarion lay back amidst the roots of a huge tree. He had propped himself up comfortably, but wasn't ready to let his guard down yet. He’d snuck into camp earlier for a few things, including a blanket, as Tav said they wanted to stay in the clearing for a while. He couldn’t fault them for it - he hardly felt ready to face the others himself, to answer questions about what they’d been up to.

He looked over to where Tav lay sleeping, head resting on the ground close to his thigh. Their warmth was enticing, but he didn’t want to be touched. Astarion glanced at the small puncture wounds on their neck, remembering how good they had tasted. How they had trusted him.

He chased the thought away. Surely they'd only given their blood over in the heat of ecstasy. But even an hour later, he felt steady and fulfilled. Had they wanted him to feel this way? Were they even thinking straight in the moment? Astarion had given himself, and they drank greedily, selfishly even, but not maliciously. Could he say the same for himself?

I did what I had to, he thought. What he'd done to Tav, charming them into bed to gain their approval, was hardly the same as what had been done to him. Manipulative, certainly. But the moment he'd been waiting for had finally come, and he'd seized it.

He looked up through the leaves to the clear night sky above, hoping to drift away from his own thoughts. His muscles felt warm and relaxed from a fulfilling meal, yet his stomach churned uncomfortably. What in the hells is wrong with me? Astarion had slept with thousands of people in the past two centuries, but tonight had been flavored with something unfamiliar. The feeling wriggled just out of reach when he tried to pin it down.

A chilled breeze caused Tav to stir in their sleep. Astarion glanced down, noticing the blanket had fallen from their shoulders. He adjusted it with a light tug, trying to fix it without waking them. He wasn’t ready for whatever they might say. He’d been rendered speechless by their admission before.

Why should it matter to him? He’d heard similar things out of the mouths of perfect strangers, drawn in by his charming facade, confusing lust for love.

Then again, none of them survived the night.

Astarion’s stomach roiled with the realization, feeling like he might be sick. He hadn’t slept with anyone who lived to tell of the encounter in two hundred years. He couldn’t even remember who he’d been with before he turned; only that he hadn’t been inexperienced. Cazador hadn’t needed to train him in the art of seduction.

Astarion’s legs tensed with the very thought of his captor, as if his body was preparing to run at a moment’s notice. His thigh jerked, disrupting Tav from their peaceful sleep. Gods damn it. Not now. Please, not now.

“Wha- Astarion?” came their quiet voice, bleary and confused.

“Yes,” he choked out, staring up at the sky to avoid their gaze. “I’m here.”

“Oh,” Tav muttered, remembering where they were. “Are you all right? You look… pained.”

Astarion closed his eyes, swallowing against the lump in his throat. Tav didn't know about the hell he'd endured. They didn't need to know. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little… restless, that’s all.”

“Will you lay with me?” they asked, voice soft with concern. “I know you don’t sleep, but…”

“I suppose so,” Astarion said quietly, after a pause. The prospect was so foreign, but sounded almost pleasant. This openness is but a small indiscretion; nothing more. He could work on regaining control of the situation tomorrow. At first light.

He slid down the tree to lay on his back, willing his muscles to loosen up. Tav snuggled into the crook of his arm, resting their head on his shoulder. The warmth of their skin against his was calming, like laying near the campfire.

The exhaustion of the day before seemed to wash over him all at once. He'd been completely satiated, hips weary, stomach comfortably full. He could feel the gentle waves of rest lapping at the edges of his mind, begging him to finally fall into a trance for the night.

“Thank you,” Tav whispered, their breath slow and hot against his bare chest. “Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams, darling.”

Astarion's Forest Clearing Scene M4M/NB

I wanted to write a retelling of Astarion's first romance scene from a positive angle, rather than assuming his initial interest is all a ruse because he has trauma. I like the idea of him reinterpreting his past through a new lens early on and grappling with that. The first chunk is an extension of the sexual part we see a bit of, and the second chunk is afterwards: Tav's asleep, and Astarion is in his head about the past. Just be aware there are non-specific mentions, mainly in the second part, of his life with Cazador, and some PTSD symptoms.

Astarion x Tav (gender neutral, they/them, AMAB/male anatomy) Rating: Explicit

Words: ~2800

Setting: Private forest clearing, after the tiefling party

Content: They have enjoyable sex, he bites, Astarion's simple plan starts to fall apart a tiny bit at a time, he thinks back on the encounter and his past, Tav comforts him

Gender neutral but there's both a male- and female-bodied version of this, I couldn't decide because I'm too bi to function tysm for your understanding~

AFAB Tav / M4F version

“There you are.”

Astarion watched Tav’s head whip around in surprise at the sound of his voice. Good, he thought. He needed them a little off-balance to keep the upper hand.

“I've been waiting,” Astarion growled, drawing closer to his mark, his opening lines rehearsed. “Waiting since the moment I set eyes on you. Waiting… to have you.”

Tav raised their eyebrows as he sauntered towards them. He could smell their blood more and more, metallic and sweet, with just a hint of alcohol left. They were still a little tipsy from the party, but not drunk. He heard their heartbeat quicken.

“Well, here I am,” Tav chuckled nervously.

Luring them away from the party had been simple enough. Laying on the charm had done the trick - a few perfect lines, a pouty gaze, a calculated brush of the hand. Astarion knew from the look in their eyes earlier that he'd won, but it was a nice confirmation to see them now.

Astarion reached for one of Tav’s hands and closed the distance between them. He pressed his other hand behind the small of their back to pull them in for a firm kiss. The warmth of their body against his was invigorating.

Tav melted into the kiss. Astarion could feel their interest poking at his hip as they made contact. He moved his free hand to the back of their neck and tilted his head deeper, Tav’s quiet groan stifled by his lips.

Finally, Astarion pulled back and pricked his face into a lopsided smile, regaining control of the situation.

“Gods, you're eager,” he purred. Tav's eyes flicked to the ground, eyebrows knitting with uncertainty. He hooked a finger under their chin to reassure them. “I like it.”

Tav met his gaze again, a small smile appearing on their face. “I suppose I was eager enough that I didn't… ask many questions. About you.”

Astarion’s stomach clenched, unsure of what to expect. “About me?”

“Yes, well… what you had planned for us tonight,” Tav said shyly, looking again at the ground. “Your… preferences. That sort of thing.”

Astarion chuckled with relief. “You mean position?” Tav's cheeks reddened and they nodded, letting out a small giggle. “I've done it all, practically,” Astarion said. Perhaps a bit arrogant, but he was trying to gauge their reaction. “I can be whatever you want me to be.”

Tav met his eyes again.

“I want you to be yourself,” they said earnestly.

Astarion felt a catch in his throat and swallowed against it. He couldn't think of a clever quip to respond to that.

“I'm partial to, erm… being in front,” Tav went on. Oh, thank the gods, Astarion thought. They were back in his comfort zone - sex, not emotions.

“I'm just a little…” their words trailed off.

“Afraid to turn your back on a vampire?” Astarion joked. Tav let out a surprised laugh, loud and genuine. Gods, they’re adorable.

“You don't need to worry about a thing,” he said, regaining a more serious tone. “I’ll let you set the pace, darling.”

Tav flashed that sweet smile again, leaning in for a kiss. They were more self-assured this time, placing their hands on Astarion's narrow hips and pushing against him of their own accord, trying to get a feel for him through his pants. He felt them poke at his hip again, knowing he was returning the favor. He inhaled sharply at the sensation, breaking from their kiss and grinding against them. Tav responded with a little moan, deep in their throat.

“I'll bet you have a pretty cock,” Astarion whispered in their ear, eliciting a gasp. “Perhaps I could see it, to confirm.”

“Perhaps.” Tav slid their hand even lower down his hip, grabbing at his ass. He pulled them in for another kiss, leaning back against a big tree. Astarion’s hand moved down between them, sliding over their belly to the front of their pants. He felt the outline of their cock, fabric taut around them. Tav inhaled deeply as they pulsed in response to his touch. Astarion moved his fingers up again, pulling at the fabric separating them. Tav moved their hands quickly to tug at their own waistband, exposing themself. He looked down admiringly for a moment.

“Gods, I was right. Look at you,” Astarion purred before taking them in his hand. A quiet moan escaped Tav’s lips. He could feel the heat radiating from their core and knew his hand must be cool against their skin. He ran his fingers down the length of their cock before gently jerking them. Tav thrusted towards him a little, their body close enough Astarion could hear their heart pounding. Gods, their blood must be so hot right now.

“I want yours,” Tav managed amidst their rising intensity. “I want to see you. Touch you.”

Astarion moved his hands to his own waistband, pulling his weapon free, watching their eyes widen at its appearance.

“Oh,” Tav blurted out. Astarion smirked, unphased. He knew he was beautiful. If he was anything, he was that.

After a second to register the new development, Tav reached for him. Their hand was so warm and soft against his skin. Astarion relaxed as they took him in their hand, letting out a sigh of pleasure.

To his surprise, Tav shifted to kneel on the ground. They met his gaze, searching for his permission to act. Taken aback, all Astarion could do was nod, watching as Tav tenderly kissed his hip, and then his cock. They parted their soft lips and licked at him. It had been a long time since anyone did this for him. Normally, he was the one on his knees, eager, convincing, charming.

Tav opened their mouth and surrounded him, sucking him off. Oh, hells, that feels good. He leaned his head back on the tree, his mind gone blank. Their mouth was so hot and smooth inside. He felt their tongue lapping at the underside of his cock as they worked.

Shit. He needed to regain control of the situation. Recall the mission at hand. Gods above, it was difficult. He put a hand to their cheek and they looked up, pulling their head away from him.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes, I just…” Words were evading him. Shit. “Come back up here.”

“Was it good?” Tav asked genuinely, standing to meet him again. “You seem a little-”

Astarion put his finger to their lips, quieting them. He put a hand in their damp hair, and kissed them, hard. He needed them to swoon, to cede control, to let him perform.

Tav broke the kiss to pull their shirt off, their hot, sweaty chest pushing up against his when they returned. He felt their exposed cock rub against his belly, leaving a drop of fluid on his skin. They seemed more than ready, but he liked to be certain.

Astarion ran his fingers down their lower back, reaching the slightly lowered waistband of their pants. He dipped his hand below their clothes, gripping at their round ass. He moved his mouth to their ear and kissed down the side of their neck, to their collarbone. He could feel them swaying, pressing into him, moaning softly, their heartbeat pounding in his ears. They were ready.

“Shall we lay down?” Astarion whispered between his own shallow breaths. Tav nodded eagerly. He laid out the linen sheet he'd brought along.

“It's not much, but it should keep the dirt off,” he chuckled, eliciting a smile from Tav. They laid on their side facing away from him.

Astarion followed their lead, laying behind them and pulling them into the crook of his body. They clumsily tugged at their pants until they were fully bare before him, thighs shivering with anticipation.

He wouldn't make them wait any longer. He disrobed and reached behind himself for the oil he'd brought, Tav peering back at him over their shoulder. He got the bottle open with his teeth and used his free hand to cover his cock thoroughly with the contents. He used the oiled hand to prep them as well, feeling them jump a little at his cool fingers. Such a nice ass.

“Are you ready?” Astarion asked quietly, knowing what they would answer.

“Yes,” came Tav’s shaky voice back at him. “Gods, yes. Start slow, okay?”

“Of course, darling,” he purred into their ear. “I'll take good care of you.”

Astarion gently pushed their top leg forward with his knee. He put his cock against their most delicate skin, feeling their hips quiver with excitement before gently pushing inside. Tav gasped and Astarion gave them a moment to settle before pushing himself further in, a little bit at a time, their every inhale matching his careful movements. He kept his hips restrained, moving slowly until he felt Tav's pelvis melt back into his own.

He wrapped his fingers around their hips, pulling them as close to him as possible. They let out a breathy moan, relaxed and open. He rocked forward into them, feeding off their little sounds of pleasure as he fucked them. So smooth and warm. What an ass. He closed his eyes and rested his slick forehead between their shoulder blades.

“Gods, you're so lovely,” Astarion panted at their back. “Oh, darling, you feel amazing.”

“You feel so- oh, so good,” Tav whined, their speech broken up by ragged breaths. “You- oh, Astarion!”

Something tugged uncomfortably in his chest. It had been a while since he’d heard his name said like that. Usually, he avoided giving it out or just lied, trying to avoid attaching his real name to a reputation for luring people into dark alleys. Many people didn't care enough to ask his name at all.

He let them do the work for a moment, grinding their hips back into him as he turned the thought over and over in his head. His mind raced with fragments of nights before.

“Astarionnn,” Tav whimpered, drawing out his name and snapping him back into the moment. “Fuck, you feel so- I’m close-”

Astarion gripped their sides and tilted their hips closer to the ground, using his knee to open their legs wider. Their back arched, ass grinding hard against his pelvis as they let out broken sounds.

“Ast- oh, I'm- I'm coming,” Tav cried out urgently. He slammed into them, rocking his hips but staying inside as they whimpered and got off. He could feel their heart, smell their blood. Oh, shit. His body suddenly ached with hunger.

“Oh, gods, that was…” Tav glanced back at him as they caught their breath. “I still want you. Please don't stop.”

Astarion looked down to see their cock standing at attention still. Their scent filled his mind, his stomach aching with the temptation.

Tav turned back to look at him again, realizing he'd lost focus. “Are you alright?”

“Your body- I'm starving,” he blurted out. Why in the hells did I say it like that?

“Oh, I thought you… I thought maybe you weren't enjoying it,” Tav panted. “You can have my blood. Whatever you need.”

Astarion's inhibitions melted in an instant. He bit down into their soft, tender neck, feeling their heart pump feverishly as he drank, his hips moving without thinking. The second taste was just as heavenly as the first had been, days before. Mixed with lust and self-satisfaction over his victory, it was nearly overwhelming.

As his hunger eased, he felt his arousal intensify. He started thrusting deep into Tav, hearing them cry out in response. His movements grew more urgent as he felt his self-control slipping. Oh, shit. He reached in front of Tav to grab their cock, feeling how desperately hard they were, and started pumping in rhythm with his own hips.

“Oh, fuck me!” Tav cried out, gasping for air. “Oh, Astarion! I'm- hahhh-” He felt them pulse, hard, over and over, his hand slipping as they came.

That was all the self-control he had left. He drank from them needily, breathing spottily, thrusting urgently. He groaned from the very bottom of his chest and came, hard, still latched onto Tav’s neck and buried deep inside of them.

Astarion’s hips and jaw relaxed and he flopped onto his back, panting so hard it made his head light. When he gained the self-awareness to check in with Tav, he saw them on their back, chest rising slower. They gazed over at him, eyelids soft and a little smile on their face.

“That was amazing,” they whispered.

“Yes, it was,” he puffed, still coming down from his own high.

After a few moments of silence, Tav spoke again.

“Astarion… I care about you.”

Oh, shit.

~~~~~

In the early hours of the morning, Astarion lay back amidst the roots of a huge tree. He had propped himself up comfortably, but wasn't ready to let his guard down yet. He’d snuck into camp earlier for a few things, including a blanket, as Tav said they wanted to stay in the clearing for a while. He couldn’t fault them for it - he hardly felt ready to face the others himself, to answer questions about what they’d been up to.

He looked over to where Tav lay sleeping, head resting on the ground close to his thigh. Their warmth was enticing, but he didn’t want to be touched. Astarion glanced at the small puncture wounds on their neck, remembering how good they had tasted. How they had trusted him.

He chased the thought away. Surely they'd only given their blood over in the heat of ecstasy. But even an hour later, he felt steady and fulfilled. Had they wanted him to feel this way? Were they even thinking straight in the moment? Astarion had given himself, and they drank greedily, selfishly even, but not maliciously. Could he say the same for himself?

I did what I had to, he thought. What he'd done to Tav, charming them into bed to gain their approval, was hardly the same as what had been done to him. Manipulative, certainly. But the moment he'd been waiting for had finally come, and he'd seized it.

He looked up through the leaves to the clear night sky above, hoping to drift away from his own thoughts. His muscles felt warm and relaxed from a fulfilling meal, yet his stomach churned uncomfortably. What in the hells is wrong with me? Astarion had slept with thousands of people in the past two centuries, but tonight had been flavored with something unfamiliar. The feeling wriggled just out of reach when he tried to pin it down.

A chilled breeze caused Tav to stir in their sleep. Astarion glanced down, noticing the blanket had fallen from their shoulders. He adjusted it with a light tug, trying to fix it without waking them. He wasn’t ready for whatever they might say. He’d been rendered speechless by their admission before.

Why should it matter to him? He’d heard similar things out of the mouths of perfect strangers, drawn in by his charming facade, confusing lust for love.

Then again, none of them survived the night.

Astarion’s stomach roiled with the realization, feeling like he might be sick. He hadn’t slept with anyone who lived to tell of the encounter in two hundred years. He couldn’t even remember who he’d been with before he turned; only that he hadn’t been inexperienced. Cazador hadn’t needed to train him in the art of seduction.

Astarion’s legs tensed with the very thought of his captor, as if his body was preparing to run at a moment’s notice. His thigh jerked, disrupting Tav from their peaceful sleep. Gods damn it. Not now. Please, not now.

“Wha- Astarion?” came their quiet voice, bleary and confused.

“Yes,” he choked out, staring up at the sky to avoid their gaze. “I’m here.”

“Oh,” Tav muttered, remembering where they were. “Are you all right? You look… pained.”

Astarion closed his eyes, swallowing against the lump in his throat. Tav didn't know about the hell he'd endured. They didn't need to know. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little… restless, that’s all.”

“Will you lay with me?” they asked, voice soft with concern. “I know you don’t sleep, but…”

“I suppose so,” Astarion said quietly, after a pause. The prospect was so foreign, but sounded almost pleasant. This openness is but a small indiscretion; nothing more. He could work on regaining control of the situation tomorrow. At first light.

He slid down the tree to lay on his back, willing his muscles to loosen up. Tav snuggled into the crook of his arm, resting their head on his shoulder. The warmth of their skin against his was calming, like laying near the campfire.

The exhaustion of the day before seemed to wash over him all at once. He'd been completely satiated, hips weary, stomach comfortably full. He could feel the gentle waves of rest lapping at the edges of his mind, begging him to finally fall into a trance for the night.

“Thank you,” Tav whispered, their breath slow and hot against his bare chest. “Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams, darling.”

Astarion's Forest Scene M4F/NB

Overview: I wanted to write a retelling of Astarion's first romance scene from a positive angle, rather than assuming his initial interest is all a ruse because he has trauma. I like the idea of him reinterpreting his past through a new lens early on and grappling with that. The first chunk is an extension/reimagining of the sexual part we see a bit of in-game, and the second chunk is an idea of the time in between the sex scene and the morning scene: Tav's asleep, and Astarion is in his head about the past. Just be aware there are non-specific mentions, mainly in the second part, of his life with Cazador, and some PTSD symptoms.

Astarion x Tav (gender neutral, they/them, AFAB/female anatomy)

Rating: Explicit (18+) Words: 3.3k Setting: Private forest clearing, after the tiefling party Content: Astarion POV, mlw/mlnb, hook-up, oral sex, PIV sex, biting, blood drinking, PTSD comfort, cuddling

Podfic/audio version

Gender neutral but there's both a male- and female-bodied version of this; I couldn't decide because I'm too bi to function tysm for your understanding~

AMAB Tav / M4M/NB version

“There you are.”

Astarion watched Tav’s head whip around in surprise at the sound of his voice. Good, he thought. He needed them a little off-balance to keep the upper hand.

“I've been waiting,” Astarion growled, drawing closer to his mark, his opening lines rehearsed. “Waiting since the moment I set eyes on you. Waiting… to have you.”

Tav raised their eyebrows as he sauntered towards them. He could smell their blood more and more, metallic and sweet, with just a hint of alcohol left. They were still a little tipsy from the party, but not drunk. He heard their heartbeat quicken.

“Well, here I am,” Tav chuckled nervously.

Luring them away from the party had been simple enough. Laying on the charm had done the trick - a few perfect lines, a pouty gaze, a calculated brush of the hand. Astarion knew from the look in their eyes earlier that he'd won, but it was a nice confirmation to see them now.

Astarion reached for one of Tav’s hands and closed the distance between them. He pressed his other hand behind the small of their back to pull them in for a firm kiss. The warmth of their body against his was invigorating.

Tav melted into the kiss, allowing their hips to make contact. He moved his free hand to the back of their neck and tilted his head deeper into the kiss, their quiet groans stifled by his lips.

Finally, Astarion pulled back and pricked his face into a lopsided smile, regaining control of the situation.

“Gods, you're eager,” he purred. Tav's eyes flicked to the ground, eyebrows knitting with uncertainty. He hooked a finger under their chin to reassure them. “I like it.”

Tav met his gaze again, a small smile appearing on their face. “I suppose I was eager enough that I didn't… ask many questions. About you.”

Astarion’s stomach clenched, unsure of what to expect. “About me?”

“Yes, well… what you had planned for us tonight,” Tav said shyly, looking again at the ground. “Your… preferences. That sort of thing.”

“I've done it all, practically,” Astarion chuckled with relief. Perhaps a bit arrogant, but he was trying to gauge their reaction. “I can be whatever you want me to be.”

Tav met his eyes again.

“I want you to be yourself,” they said earnestly.

Astarion felt a catch in his throat and swallowed against it. He couldn't think of a clever quip to respond to that.

“I really want to relax tonight, after all this,” Tav went on. Oh, thank the gods, Astarion thought. They were back in his comfort zone - sex, not emotions.

“I'm just a little…” their words trailed off.

“Afraid to turn your back on a vampire?” Astarion joked. Tav let out a surprised laugh, loud and genuine. Gods, they’re adorable.

“You don't need to worry about a thing,” he said, regaining a more serious tone. “I’ll let you set the pace, darling.”

Tav flashed that sweet smile again, leaning in for a kiss. They were more self-assured this time, placing their hands on Astarion's narrow hips and pushing against him of their own accord, trying to get a feel for him through his pants. He inhaled sharply at the sensation, breaking from their kiss and grinding against them. Tav responded with a little moan, deep in their throat.

“I'll bet you look even prettier under your clothes,” Astarion whispered in their ear, eliciting a gasp. “Perhaps I could see you, to confirm.”

“Perhaps.” Tav untucked their shirt, inviting him closer to their skin. He pulled them in for another kiss, leaning back against a big tree. Astarion’s hand moved down between them, sliding under their shirt. He could feel the heat radiating from their core and knew his hand must be cool against their skin. He worked carefully up over their belly to their chest, feeling their breathing speed up in response to his touch.

Instead of undergarments, his fingers grazed the underside of Tav’s bare breasts. He pulled back from their lips a bit, watching as they smiled and flushed at his surprise.

“What an unexpected treat,” Astarion purred, his fingers moving across their smooth breasts before kissing them again. He gently pawed at them, feeling his own cock pulse in response. Tav gasped a bit, excited at the prospect.

Astarion felt their hands move down and tug at the shirt separating them. He moved out of the way as they pulled it up over their head. He stared admiringly for a moment.

“Gods, I was right. Look at you,” Astarion whispered.

Tav moved in for another kiss, their breasts rubbing against his own bare torso. They feel heavenly, he thought, wrapped up in the sensation. He snaked his hand down their belly and over the outside of their pants, pausing briefly to wait for an objection before feeling between their legs.

A quiet moan escaped Tav’s lips. They thrusted towards him a little, their body close enough Astarion could hear their heart pounding. Gods, their blood must be so hot right now.

“I want your cock,” Tav managed amidst their rising intensity. “I want to see you. Touch you.”

Astarion moved his hands to his own waistband, pulling his weapon free, watching their eyes widen at its appearance.

“Oh,” Tav blurted out. Astarion smirked, unphased. He knew he was beautiful. If he was anything, he was that.

After a second to register the new development, Tav reached for him. Their hand was so warm and soft against his skin. Astarion relaxed as they took him in their hand, letting out a sigh of pleasure.

To his surprise, Tav shifted to kneel on the ground. They met his gaze, searching for his permission to act. Taken aback, all Astarion could do was nod, watching as Tav tenderly kissed his hip, and then his cock. They parted their soft lips and licked at him. It had been a long time since anyone did this for him. Normally, he was the one on his knees, eager, convincing, charming.

Tav opened their mouth and surrounded him, sucking him off. Oh, hells, that feels good. He leaned his head back on the tree, his mind gone blank. Their mouth was so hot and smooth inside. He felt their tongue lapping at the underside of his cock as they worked.

Shit. He needed to regain control of the situation. Recall the mission at hand. Gods above, it was difficult. He put a hand to their cheek and they looked up, pulling their head away from him.

“Everything alright?”

“Yes, I just…” Words were evading him. Shit. “Come back up here.”

“Was it good?” Tav asked genuinely, standing to meet him again. “You seem a little-”

Astarion put his finger to their lips, quieting them. He put a hand in their damp hair, and kissed them, hard. He needed them to swoon, to cede control, to let him perform.

Mission accomplished. He felt them melt into him once more, his exposed cock poking at their smooth belly.

“I want to make you feel good, darling,” Astarion whispered, his lips brushing against their ear. “Tonight is for the both of us.”

Tav shivered as he spoke, nodding. He took them by the shoulders and switched them against the tree in his place. He kissed down the side of their neck, to their collarbone and breasts. Astarion took one of their nipples in his mouth and sucked, carefully avoiding contact with his fangs as he did. He could feel them swaying, pressing into him, moaning softly, their heartbeat pounding in his ears.

Astarion moved to his knees, tugging at their waistband and working their pants off. He kissed across their hip bone, mirroring their own actions, slowly working his mouth closer to the center of their pelvis. Tav gasped and wiggled with anticipation.

His mouth finally reached their cunt, where he ran his tongue slowly across, making them shudder. Astarion's right hand snaked up the inside of Tav’s thigh until he reached between their legs, feeling them from below. They're so hot and wet, Gods above. The excitement travelled down through his core and he felt his cock pulse in response.

He looked up at them from where he sat, checking their expression again before sliding a finger inside. Astarion had carefully tended to his hands and nails earlier in the evening, not wanting his claws to interfere. He saw Tav's mouth drop open as he felt for their most sensitive area. He found it with several strokes, giving slight resistance to his touch from inside and making their eyes widen. He joined his finger with a second and put his mouth back to their cunt, lapping at the front of them while he worked.

Astarion closed his eyes and focused on making Tav feel good, using their moans and shallow breaths as guidance. Their pelvis jutted against his mouth as they grew louder.

“That feels amazing,” Tav whimpered. “Oh, Gods, I love it.”

He worked them inside and out with a bit more vigor, glancing up to see their expression. Their head was leaned back against the tree, mouth open and panting. Excellent.

“You look so beautiful,” he purred.

Tav looked down at him, eyelids fluttering. Astarion could feel their thighs and hips begin to shudder. Perfect.

“Oh, I'm-” Tav choked out, eyes widening urgently. “Don't stop, I'm close to-”

Astarion worked even more feverishly, using his tongue and fingers in harmony as they thrusted at him.

“Oh, fuck!” Tav cried out, louder than he expected. He felt their hips jolt towards his face, their cunt pulsing around his fingers. He felt his cock pulse in response, longing to take their place inside.

Tav's thighs relaxed and he felt them start to slide down the tree. He used his shoulder to brace them from between their legs, grabbing onto their hip with his free hand.

“Careful, darling!” Astarion chuckled breathlessly. “A fall would ruin the fun, now wouldn't it?”

He freed himself from between their legs, standing to hold them up while they caught their breath.

“Shall we lay down? Will you be alright without my help?” Astarion asked after a moment. Tav nodded eagerly. He let go and laid out the linen sheet he'd brought along.

“It's not much, but it should keep the dirt off,” he chuckled, eliciting a smile from Tav. They laid down on their side facing away from him, thighs shivering with anticipation. Astarion followed their lead, laying behind them and pulling them into the crook of his body. Such a nice ass.

He disrobed and reached behind himself for the oil he'd brought, Tav peering back at him over their shoulder. He got the bottle open with his teeth and used his free hand to cover his cock thoroughly with the contents. He used the oiled hand to prep them as well, though it wasn’t necessary. They were nearly dripping from before.

“Are you ready?” Astarion asked quietly, knowing what they would answer.

“Yes,” came Tav’s shaky voice back at him. “Gods, yes. Start slow, okay?”

“Of course, darling,” he purred into their ear. “I'll take good care of you.”

Astarion gently pushed their top leg forward with his knee. He put his cock against their most delicate skin, feeling how desperately wet they were before gently pushing inside. Tav gasped and Astarion gave them a moment to settle before pushing himself further in. He kept his hips restrained, moving slowly until he felt Tav's pelvis melt back into his own.

He wrapped his fingers around their hips, pulling them as close to him as possible. They let out a breathy moan, relaxed and open. He rocked forward into them, feeding off their little sounds of pleasure as he fucked them. So smooth and warm. What a nice cunt. He closed his eyes and rested his slick forehead between their shoulder blades.

“Gods, you're so lovely,” Astarion panted at their back. “Oh, darling, you feel amazing.”

“You feel so- oh, so good,” Tav whined, their speech broken up by ragged breaths. “You- oh, Astarion!”

Something tugged uncomfortably in his chest. It had been a while since he’d heard his name said like that. Usually, he avoided giving it out or just lied, trying to avoid attaching his real name to a reputation for luring people into dark alleys. Many people didn't care enough to ask his name at all.

He let them do the work for a moment, grinding their hips back into him as he turned the thought over and over in his head. His mind raced with fragments of nights before.

“Astarionnn,” Tav whimpered, drawing out his name and snapping him back into the moment. “Fuck, you feel so- I’m close-”

Astarion gripped their sides and tilted their hips closer to the ground, using his knee to open their legs wider. Their back arched, pelvis grinding hard against his as they let out broken sounds.

“Ast- oh, I'm- I'm coming,” Tav cried out urgently. He slammed into them, rocking his hips but staying inside as they whimpered and got off. He could feel their heart, smell their blood. Oh, shit. His body suddenly ached with hunger.

“Oh, gods, that was…” Tav glanced back at him as they caught their breath. “Did you…?”

Astarion shook his head, staring blankly down at their skin instead of meeting their gaze. Their scent filled his mind, his stomach aching with the temptation.

Tav’s eyebrows knitted in concern, realizing he'd lost focus. “Are you alright?”

“Your body- I'm starving,” he blurted out. Why in the hells did I say it like that?

“Oh, I thought you… I thought maybe you weren't enjoying it,” Tav said, still panting. “You can have my blood. Whatever you need.”

Astarion's inhibitions melted in an instant. He bit down into their soft, tender neck, feeling their heart pump feverishly as he drank, his hips moving without thinking. The second taste was just as heavenly as the first had been, days before. Mixed with lust and self-satisfaction over his victory, it was nearly overwhelming.

As his hunger eased, he felt his arousal intensify. He started thrusting deep into Tav, hearing them cry out in response. His movements grew more urgent as he felt his self-control slipping. Oh, shit. He restrained his own movements, delaying the inevitable, and reached in front of Tav, using his fingers to work them where they were most sensitive. Panting and whining, Tav pushed their pelvis against his to get as much contact as possible.

“Oh, fuck me!” Tav cried out, gasping for air. “Oh, Astarion! I'm- hahhh-” He felt them pulse around his cock as he’d hoped, the sensation enough to drive him mad.

That was all the self-control he had left. He drank from them needily, breathing spottily, thrusting urgently. He groaned from the very bottom of his chest and came, hard, still latched onto Tav’s neck and buried deep inside of them.

Astarion’s hips and jaw relaxed and he flopped onto his back, panting so hard it made his head light. When he gained the self-awareness to check in with Tav, he saw them on their back, chest rising slower. They gazed over at him, eyelids soft and a little smile on their face.

“That was amazing,” they whispered.

“Yes, it was,” he puffed, still coming down from his own high.

After a few moments of silence, Tav spoke again.

“Astarion… I care about you.”

Oh, shit.

~~~~~

In the early hours of the morning, Astarion lay back amidst the roots of a huge tree. He had propped himself up comfortably, but wasn't ready to let his guard down yet. He’d snuck into camp earlier for a few things, including a blanket, as Tav said they wanted to stay in the clearing for a while. He couldn’t fault them for it - he hardly felt ready to face the others himself, to answer questions about what they’d been up to.

He looked over to where Tav lay sleeping, head resting on the ground close to his thigh. Their warmth was enticing, but he didn’t want to be touched. Astarion glanced at the small puncture wounds on their neck, remembering how good they had tasted. How they had trusted him.

He chased the thought away. Surely they'd only given their blood over in the heat of ecstasy. But even an hour later, he felt steady and fulfilled. Had they wanted him to feel this way? Were they even thinking straight in the moment? Astarion had given himself, and they drank greedily, selfishly even, but not maliciously. Could he say the same for himself?

I did what I had to, he thought. What he'd done to Tav, charming them into bed to gain their approval, was hardly the same as what had been done to him. Manipulative, certainly. But the moment he'd been waiting for had finally come, and he'd seized it.

He looked up through the leaves to the clear night sky above, hoping to drift away from his own thoughts. His muscles felt warm and relaxed from a fulfilling meal, yet his stomach churned uncomfortably. What in the hells is wrong with me? Astarion had slept with thousands of people in the past two centuries, but tonight had been flavored with something unfamiliar. The feeling wriggled just out of reach when he tried to pin it down.

A chilled breeze caused Tav to stir in their sleep. Astarion glanced down, noticing the blanket had fallen from their shoulders. He adjusted it with a light tug, trying to fix it without waking them. He wasn’t ready for whatever they might say. He’d been rendered speechless by their admission before.

Why should it matter to him? He’d heard similar things out of the mouths of perfect strangers, drawn in by his charming facade, confusing lust for love.

Then again, none of them survived the night.

Astarion’s stomach roiled with the realization, feeling like he might be sick. He hadn’t slept with anyone who lived to tell of the encounter in two hundred years. He couldn’t even remember who he’d been with before he turned; only that he hadn’t been inexperienced. Cazador hadn’t needed to train him in the art of seduction.

Astarion’s legs tensed with the very thought of his captor, as if his body was preparing to run at a moment’s notice. His thigh jerked, disrupting Tav from their peaceful sleep. Gods damn it. Not now. Please, not now.

“Wha- Astarion?” came their quiet voice, bleary and confused.

“Yes,” he choked out, staring up at the sky to avoid their gaze. “I’m here.”

“Oh,” Tav muttered, remembering where they were. “Are you all right? You look… pained.”

Astarion closed his eyes, swallowing against the lump in his throat. Tav didn't know about the hell he'd endured. They didn't need to know. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little… restless, that’s all.”

“Will you lay with me?” they asked, voice soft with concern. “I know you don’t sleep, but…”

“I suppose so,” Astarion said quietly, after a pause. The prospect was so foreign, but sounded almost pleasant. This openness is but a small indiscretion; nothing more. He could work on regaining control of the situation tomorrow. At first light.

He slid down the tree to lay on his back, willing his muscles to loosen up. Tav snuggled into the crook of his arm, resting their head on his shoulder. The warmth of their skin against his was calming, like laying near the campfire.

The exhaustion of the day before seemed to wash over him all at once. He'd been completely satiated, hips weary, stomach comfortably full. He could feel the gentle waves of rest lapping at the edges of his mind, begging him to finally fall into a trance for the night.

“Thank you,” Tav whispered, their breath slow and hot against his bare chest. “Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams, darling.”

Listen, I am all for Larian’s beautiful cutscenes and character moments —

— but why the fuck weren’t we allowed to comfort Astarion after he murders Cazador?

(Consider this a little fix-it fic for that specific moment in game.)

His cries were heartbreaking to hear.

They echoed throughout the dungeon, bouncing off the walls and reverberating in your ears, making your chest tighten further and further.

His body shakes as his cries die down, shifting back to rest on his knees as his eyes blankly stare down at Cazador's corpse. Stray tears drip down his cheeks and mix with the blood that coats his face, yet he makes no move to wipe any of it away.

Astarion's neck and body stand rigid as his ears begin to ring, drowning out the sounds of the confused spawn that surround him. Their voices sound muddled in his head, buzzed little whispers that he can't decipher.

He's dissociated completely, separated from reality in a way that makes your heart crack. His eyes were blank, devoid of that usual mischievous spark that never failed to make you smile. Now he was a hollowed out man, one troubled by a past that he had just ripped himself from -- by means of murder.

Slowly, you approach him, your hands planted firmly against your sides so that you would not be tempted to accidentally overwhelm him. Your eyes rake over the entirety of his figure -- his blank eyes, his devoid expression, his hunched body. You couldn't put into words the heartbreak you felt simply by gazing at him.

"Astarion."

His head just barely tilts in your direction, as if he hadn't heard you properly. Unlike the voices of the spawn that surround him, your voice sounds as clear as day to him. It pierces through the ringing that buzzes in his ears, reaching him with a softness that feels so foreign yet so familiar at the same time.

You kneel down beside him, glancing quickly at Cazador's corpse before your gaze flickers to glance at his profile.

Silently, you reach your arms out, wrapping them around Astarion's neck and lightly pulling him against your chest. He doesn't fight against your touch. Oddly enough, he finds himself leaning into it even though every atom of his body wants to fight and thrash against you.

"I'm here," you murmur to him, tightening your hold on him. "I'm right here with you."

Astarion's hands grip onto your arms that encircle him, his eyes falling shut as he soaks up the warmth of your embrace like a dried sponge.

And in your arms, his world goes quiet. But not in a way that scares him. No, this touch ... your touch ... it comforts him.

It reminds him that his actions were worth it in the end, for he was able to turn and find you still at his side.

Just a random, domestic scenario that I thought of about Astarion and it made me soft enough to put into writing.

Picture this …

Astarion, especially after everything that he’s been through with Cazador, definitely has to re-teach himself what it means to love without primarily focusing on physical intimacy. Everything that he’s ever known about loving someone, or rather, everything that he thought that he knew about loving someone is restricted solely to sex.

Of course, his understanding of love drastically changes when you waltz into his life. You with your words of affirmation, you with your soft hands, you with the hugs and kisses that don’t necessarily lead to something more. It strikes him as odd … why is it that you saw past his body and looked at him? Really, truly looked at him.

In the beginning, it scares him. It invokes a feeling in him that he wasn’t able to define, and in truth, it scared him. It scared him that every time your arms wrapped around him or every time your lips touched his, he felt warm. For a second, for one singular split second, Astarion felt alive.

And because of that, he pushed you away. It scared him even more when you actually let him.

“We don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with,” you’d told him one night. You were sitting up beside him, his head resting beside your thigh while his eyes stared up at the flickering night sky. “I have no problem waiting for you.”

And wait for him you did. Never once did you pressure him into anything, never once did you make him feel as if your touch was anything but comforting — you didn’t want him to revert back to the mindset that he had become so accustomed to. When he reached for you, you did the same. And if he didn’t, you never grew angry with him.

For that, he was thankful.

All of your waiting comes to a head one night at the camp’s fire. As usual, you sit at Astarion’s side, both of you sitting in a comfortable silence. His fingers itch to hold yours, but he wills himself to stay completely still — even though he wants to hold and touch you, something in him roots him to his place, preventing it.

“Astarion?” He turns at the sound of your voice, blinking away the glazed look that had pained his eyes in favor of looking at you instead. Your eyebrows pinch together, creasing the space between your eyes. “Are you alright love?”

“Fine,” he answers, voice dead and cold. You hum, nodding your head, not prying any further. Even though he certainly doesn’t want to speak about what plagues his mind, a small part of him also wished that you would pry — likely because he knew that eventually, he would crack.

But you don’t. Because you understand the possibility that he would shut himself away further, retreating back to a place where you might not be able to reach him. “Alright, but if something is bothering you, you know that I am here for you.”

“That’s what … scares me,” Astarion whispers, his voice barely audible over the crackle of the camp’s fire. You turn your head to him, gaze catching his profile, silently waiting for him to continue. “Why do you stay … knowing that what you give isn’t reciprocated?”

His question catches you off guard. Was that what was bothering him? His inability to reciprocate the love that you so easily gave to him? Your heart sinks, eyes softening as you angle yourself to look at Astarion fully. The intensity of your gaze makes him feel as if you’re looking through him — through the flirtatious facade that he had put up constantly and seeing Astarion. Seeing ‘Little Star.’

Your silence worries him; makes him feel as if what he had asked you was wrong. Your lips are pressed into a firm, thin line with your eyes focused so intently on his own. Astarion feels as if you’re analyzing him … judging him. But you’re not, and he knows that you’re not.

“Because I don’t do the things that I do expecting it to be reciprocated,” you answer easily, allowing your lips to turn upward into a soft smile. A smile that begins to melt away the iceberg of worry nestled somewhere in Astarion’s chest. You inhale deeply, holding your hand up with your palm facing Astarion. “Here, if you’re okay with it, I want you to lay your palm against mine.”

Astarion’s eyes narrow, confused. His gaze flickers between your upheld palm and your eyes, which hold no ounce of malice or ill intent. Hesitantly, and very slowly, he lifts his palm. And slowly, very slowly, he brings it towards your own, laying it flat against yours.

Shockingly, the touch doesn’t burn. It doesn’t leave behind a searing scar that he would look at with distaste. Instead, it fills him with a comfortable warmth, one that reinforces the genuine love that you feel for him. The love that extends far beyond physical intimacy, far beyond sex — far beyond anything that Astarion had ever experienced.

“Something as small as this,” you say, not moving your palm from against Astarion’s, “is enough reciprocation for everything.”

He remains silent, watching you. You smile, and as if running on autopilot, he returns it.

Astarion, once he's comfortable with you, is definitely the type of man to sleepily reach for you when he realizes that you've rolled out of his arms at night.

Like the moment, and I mean the moment, that he doesn't feel you wrapped up in his arms, he's up. Sure, he's groggy as all hell and he can't properly see anything around him -- but all he knows is that he's not holding you when he most definitely should be.

He'll push himself up onto his elbows, squinting to see that you've turned yourself away from him and rolled out of his arms. Your back is turned to him, but he knows that it wasn't intentional.

With a fanged yawn, Astarion reaches for you again. His arms loop around your waist and turn you around, tucking your head beneath his chin. Instinctively, your legs tangle with his own, your arms adjusting to wrap around his midsection.

He grins to himself, content again.

Just thinking about Astarion as a personification of the trope "unamused until my S/O walks into the room."

Just imagine it.

Karlach had practically insisted that the group rest at a nearby tavern following a successful battle against a particularly nasty band of goblins. Nobody dared protest with her, not when you smiled and nodded happily along with her idea.

That led you and the rest of your companions to a small, rundown tavern on the outskirts of the town you had visited.

To be fair, Astarion had never been a fan of spending time in crowded places -- that much had been evident from the very start. You had always noticed that on the nights where you and the others gathered around the camp's fire Astarion would retire for the night.

You never pushed him, and for that he was grateful. And after all, he would have you to himself soon enough. You always sought him out after spending time with the others, ready to sleep curled up against his side and whisper to him underneath the moon's glow.

But this time was different, now he was surrounded by lowly creatures that he couldn't be paid to interact with. They danced happily and drank with one another, their happiness only adding to Astarion's very visible frustration.

He stands off to the side, his arms crossed firmly over his chest while his hardened scarlet eyes roam over the tavern's patrons. Shadowheart, Gale, and Lae'zel seem to be enjoying themselves, drinking happily and engaging in pleasent conversation. Karlach is most definitely enjoying herself, indulging in the tavern's ale and laughing heartily.

Astarion's ears perk at the sweet sound of your laughter, his eyes flickering to you. You were talking with the tavern's bartender, lips curled upward at something she had said to you.

The sight is almost instant; Astarion's eyes soften, the crease in between his brows vanishes, and the scowl on his lips is replaced by a gentle smile. He leans a bit more comfortably against the tavern's wall, attention focused on you.

He may despise going on, but to see you smiling and happy? Maybe going out wasn't so bad after all.

Can you write one where Astarion realizes that Tav is acting strangely because it's actually Orin and the actual Tav is kidnapped by her?? Thank you so much and I love your work!!

A/N - Oh my god I absolutely adore the trope of kidnapped lover being rescued (the parasites in me crave the angst). I hope you like this, I had a lot of fun writing it! So thank you @fanficlov-3-r <3

I Know You

Preview - "And he knew that the others knew that little fact as well, considering that Shadowheart had already whispered to the others something along the lines of, '(Y/N) isn't amongst us.'"

Warning(s) - mature themes, foul language, canon BG3 violence

Word Count - 3.9k

Astarion prided himself on his ability to have memorized everything about you, from how your nose scrunched when you saw something you disliked to how your eyes sparkled when you noticed him staring at you from across the fire. It was those little things that simply made you … well … you. 

Which was why he found it very offputting when he noticed your excessive alcohol intake while attending a Tiefling party. Yes, you liked to indulge in a glass of wine or two while you chatted happily with Astarion or any of your other companions – but never had he seen you cradle an entire bottle of wine to yourself and drink it in its entirety. 

But that behavior was only one of multiple that he had noticed throughout the night; you were dancing with any Tiefling who offered their hand, you seemed to stray away from him and the others throughout the night, and the smile you wore did not reach your eyes in the slightest. It seemed fake, similar to the smiles that Astarion had once flashed at you to get your clothes off. 

“Is it just me or does (Y/N) seem a little … off?” Shadowheart comments, her eyebrow raising as she watches you indulge another Tiefling in a drunken dance. You stumble over both your feet and his own, a detail that both she and Astarion narrow their eyes at. 

For an oh-so-grateful leader, you were being careless tonight. 

Astarion’s eyes follow those of Shadowheart’s, landing on you just as you are finishing a dance with your fifth Tiefling of the night. He bows to you shakily, and in return, you curtsy – another move that Astarion had never thought he would see you perform. 

“I must say that I agree with Shadowheart. Excuse me for a moment,” Astarion abandons his half-empty wine glass, sliding it across the bar. The bartender raises a brow at Astarion, but says nothing. 

You chuckle heartily as a Tiefling female approaches you, in her hands a sparkling glass of champagne. You take it from her the moment it’s offered, just about to bring it to your lips before a pale hand clasps over your shoulder. 

“Ah-ah darling, I think that’s enough with the drinking for one night,” Astarion says with a fanged smile, angling himself so that he’s able to pluck the champagne glass from your hands quickly. You turn to him, eyebrows pinched together in an expression that mixes frustration and shock – as if you had been caught doing something that you shouldn’t. 

“Come off Astarion, I can indulge if I so choose,” you retort quickly, fingers extending towards your glass. Astarion lifts his arm, the glass just barely out of your reach. “You are indulging tonight, are you not?”

He chuckles, his chest rumbling against your shoulder as his scarlet eyes rake over your figure. Something was wrong, it wasn’t just your general composure – it was everything down to the very way that you stood on your own two feet. 

“While that is true, I am watching what I indulge in,” Astarion says, already glancing at Shadowheart, who nods knowingly. She mumbles something inaudibly then to Gale, and soon a secret message is relayed over all of your companions. 

The Tiefling female had long since left your side, only adding to your annoyance that Astarion had come to your side. You turn sharply to face him, eyes narrowing at him. 

“And just explain to me why you thought it necessary to disrupt my fun?” you snap, glaring daggers into the vampire who stands in front of you. Astarion merely sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose between his index finger and thumb. His eyes flicker over you again, and it is in that moment that he realizes something … you were most certainly not you. 

And he knew that the others knew that little fact as well, considering that Shadowheart had already whispered to the others something along the lines of, “(Y/N) isn’t amongst us.” 

“Because I know you (Y/N), and right now,” Astarion pauses only to yank you closer, lowering his lips to your ear. “You are not who you say that you are.”

You freeze in his arms, eyes flickering to look at him. The crease in your eyebrows vanishes, your expression of frustration replaced now by one of shock. “What are you on about?”

“Oh come on now, don’t play dumb with me,” Astarion growls, his grip over your wrist tightening, “I know (Y/N), and she would never indulge in such things of her own accord.”

You swallow the growing lump in your throat, not protesting as a very angered Astarion drags you out of the Tiefling party. He is quickly flanked by Shadowheart and the others, none of whom offer you looks of sympathy – if anything, they look just as angered as the vampire in front of you. 

The moment that your feet touch camp, your wrists and ankles are promptly tied by Karlach, who offers you no answers even as you demand to know what in the hells is going on. Astarion stands quietly at her side, his arms folded over his chest whilst his mind promptly races.

Where were you? Who was sitting in your place? Where the hells were you?

With a singular wave of his hand over your body, Gale reveals Orin to the others, then steps back and glares down his nose at her. In response, her lips only turn upward in a grin, one that sends a shiver down the spines of those that surround her. 

“Where is–”

“Oh please, save me the dramatics,” Orin says with a roll of her eyes, adjusting herself so that she sits comfortably. Her attention moves to Astarion, her smile widening at the sight of the expression that he wears. 

“You have five minutes to answer our questions before–”

Orin’s head tilts in Lae’zel’s direction, her eyes crinkling as her smile widens impossibly further. Her lips part, a delighted chuckle falling from her lips. “Before what? You kill me? If I die, (Y/N)’s location dies with me.”

In a flash of white and silver, the blade of a dagger is pressed against the skin of Orin’s neck, pressed down just hard enough to draw a thin line of blood. Astarion kneels in front of Orin, narrowed eyes glaring daggers into her as his lips pull back in an angered growl. 

“You will reveal (Y/N)’s location lest you want to end up a paled mess on the ground.” He was shocked by how much your disappearance had affected him – especially considering that he was supposed to be keeping his affection for you a secret from the others. 

There was a reason behind his secrecy, however, a reason that you had agreed with when he had first proposed the idea to you. It was for your safety, for your protection. But it seemed like even with that … he still couldn’t keep the one thing that kept him sane safe. 

Orin chuckles, leaning forward so that her nose just barely grazes his own. He can feel her breath as it fans over his face – it disgusts him. 

“Is that so?” Her head tilts, another delighted chuckle bubbling up her throat and spilling over her lips. Astarion pushes the blade further against her, ignoring the yells of warning delivered by the other members of the party. 

His eyes narrow, his eyebrows pinch together, and his expression hardens. Orin only chuckles again, sighing dreamily in a way that reminds Astarion of a hopelessly lovesick girl. Gods, what he would give to plunge the blade of his dagger into her neck. 

“Fine, but I hope you know I’m not yielding because of your … intimidation,” Orin murmurs, pouting childishly as Astarion pulls her to her feet, still glaring at her. He says nothing as he drags her past the others, not checking over his shoulder to see that the others have followed him.

< … >

Another chilled shiver runs up the length of your spine, using your vertebrae as a ladder. You turn uncomfortably onto your side, trying once again to tug your ankles from their shackles. All you’re met with is the sound of rattling metal. 

It had been a few hours … or perhaps even a few days since you last saw the others. You didn’t know – perhaps time worked differently when you were captured. 

The last you remembered, you were walking silently along a forest pathway with Astarion a few feet behind you. You were engrossed in the beauty of the willow trees that hung silently over you, their branches serving you the beautiful luxury of shade that covered you from the sun’s blaring rays. 

Just as you turned a corner in the forest, a cold hand that wasn’t Astarion’s clasped over your own, tugging you away into a forest patch. One good knock to the side of the head … and that was the last that you were able to clearly remember. 

When you awoke, your ankles were shackled to a wall and your wrists were bound with rope, rubbing uncomfortably against your skin and leaving behind angry red marks. 

Your body had been littered with marks; cuts, bruises, and gashes. At first, they hadn’t hurt you at all – but you blamed that entirely on your adrenaline. Now every cut burned, every bruise ached, and every gash felt as though it would never stop bleeding. 

Surely every vampiric creature within a 50-mile radius could smell your blood … especially considering how much of it lay in a disgusting puddle surrounding your body. 

A shaky breath escapes you, one that you surely hoped would be your last. Your teary eyes flicker around the cell that you’d been thrown into; the cell that lacked even so much as a window. You were completely disconnected from the outside world, and for a singular moment, you thought that maybe you had died. 

And maybe you were okay with that now … with dying. 

Even though for so long you had tried your hardest to protect everyone – practically throwing your life down on the line for the lives of your companions – being captured was making you realize something. 

Maybe they didn’t care about you nearly as much as you cared about them.

If they cared, they would be searching for you. If they cared, you wouldn’t be bleeding out in some dank old cell with no way to know what time of day it was. If they cared … they would prove it, wouldn’t they?

A choked sob claws its way up your throat, legs curling inward. You wrap your arms around them, hugging them against your chest as your body curls inward into a fetal position. 

They didn’t care. Not Gale, not Karlach, not Lae’zel, not Shadowheart. 

Not even Astarion.

Astarion …

After everything that you had done for him. You had spared him that morning while walking with Shadowheart. You had let him stay in your camp even though he spat venomous insults each time you interacted politely with him. Hells, you had even let the damn man feed on you. 

In exchange for your blood, he was letting you rot alone in a cell. 

So much for helping others, you think quietly to yourself, tears slipping down your cheeks as your lashes flutter shut. A gentle numbness spreads over you as if someone had draped a blanket over you. It felt nice. It felt safe. 

Your shoulders relax, your lips part. 

One gentle breath falls from your lips before all goes silent.

< … >

“Come on now, I’ve led you right to where she is! The least you can do is entertain a conversation,” Orin complains loudly, huffing childishly as Astarion continues shoving her forward. 

There was no lie to her words, she had led Astarion and the others to where she had thrown you – a dimly lit dungeon hallway that was only filled with the sounds of low groans and dripping water, but even those had become scarce the longer that they walked. 

“The only thing I’ll entertain is your demise,” Astarion bites out, though he desperately wishes that he had kept his mouth shut. Orin doesn’t fail to catch the tremble in his voice – the vulnerability that seeps from his words. 

Her lips curl, another delighted chuckle rumbling somewhere deep inside of her chest. Her eyes flicker to catch a glimpse of Astarion’s profile, her chuckle deepening as she notices the emotional turmoil sketched into his features. 

“I wonder what you will do to me when you realize that she’s–”

“Hush,” Astarion hisses, reaching down and yanking the bonds around Orin’s wrist. The rub of the rope against her skin is enough to silence her. “Not another word out of you, wench.”

Orin stifles the small whimper of pain that had threatened to fall from her lips, instead turning to the cell that they were nearing; your cell. 

At the sight of the metal bars and uneven stones, she giggles. Astarion passes her off to Shadowheart, ignoring the cleric’s protests as he approaches the cell. 

“Oh shit.”

The world seems to go completely silent at the sight that lies before Astarion’s eyes, a sight that he immediately wishes that he could forget. 

You lay on your side with your back facing the cell’s door, blood – your blood – surrounding you in a crimson puddle. The bits of skin that Astarion can see are littered with cuts and bruises, your legs covered in gashes that continue to drip with fresh blood. 

In any other situation, Astarion would have marveled at both the sight and smell of your blood … perhaps even allowed himself to indulge in it. 

But now?

Gods, he had never been more disgusted by any one sight or smell. 

“Astarion? What’s – oh my Gods,” Karlach raises a hand to her mouth, palm covering her lips as she gazes upon the same sight as Astarion. The others join her, and each of them falls silent. “You take … her … and get out of here.”

Shadowheart nods, shooting Orin a sharpened glare before tugging the shapeshifter back down the way that they had come, ignoring her yells of protests and the way that she struggles against the ropes that bind her wrists together. 

With one tug at the already worn-down metal, Karlach disconnects the bars of the cell. She steps inside, carefully approaching you before copying her previous actions and removing the shackles from around your ankles. 

“(Y/N)?” she murmurs down to you, lightly shaking your shoulder while simultaneously trying to be sure that she does not burn you – the last she wants is to add to your injuries. 

She’s pushed aside by Astarion, who kneels beside you and feels his breath hitch at the sight of your paled face. Your cheeks have lost their usual rosy color, replaced instead by a white that looked as though it could rival the color of his hair. 

“Shit,” is the only thing that he’s able to say properly before he scoops you into his arms. He shakes on his feet for a moment, the sudden weight in his arms debilitating his balance. He says nothing as he strides past the others, making a beeline for the exit.

< … >

The first thing that you feel is a dull ache, then followed by a wave of pain that has you shooting upright and promptly vomiting onto whatever surface happens to be beside you. The moment you’ve finished emptying your stomach, a piece of cloth is offered to you by a pale hand – a familiar one this time. 

Hesitantly, you take it, dabbing the cloth against your mouth before looking up to who had handed it to you. 

“Astarion?”

“That would be my name, yes darling,” Astarion responds, though his tone doesn’t hold his usual flirtatious lilt that you had grown so used to. No, he sounds exhausted … it made you wonder just how long he had sat at your bedside. 

Your eyes roam over him, taking note of the tiny, barely-there bags that rest beneath his eyes. For a man who cared so deeply about appearance, he surely looked as though he had let himself go … likely because of you.

As much as you wish to take him into your arms and comfort you, a fleeting thought passes through your mind — he had taken his sweet time in finding you. 

If the roles had been reversed, and it had been Astarion who was taken from you, you already knew that you would have searched Heaven and Earth trying to find him. No stone would have been left unturned, no witness left unspoken to … you would have stopped at nothing. 

But it felt as though Astarion hadn’t cared enough, if he had, you wouldn’t have been as badly wounded as you were. You wouldn’t have laid in that cell for as long as you have, not that you knew the length of time in which you had been missing anyway. 

Astarion’s head lifts at the sound of you rustling, body scooting back from him until your spine rests against the headboard of your bed. You lift your knees to your chest, hugging around them. 

“Darling?”

You remain silent, but you allow your eyes to raise to meet his awaiting gaze. He waits patiently, though you can’t help but feel as though he’s analyzing you.

“How long have I been gone?” you ask. Astarion pauses, scarlet eyes flickering away from you. He swallows, you can see the emotional turmoil that swims in his eyes. Answer me, you usher in your mind. 

“Orin wouldn’t tell us,” Astarion answers honestly, voice wavering as he recounts his angered questioning of the shapeshifter. She had only giggled in his presence and “answered” his question with another question of her own. 

You remain silent, nodding to yourself as you glance down at the bandages that adorn your arms and legs. It makes you wonder if Astarion had patched you himself … or perhaps he had made one of your other companions do it. 

You lift your head, noticing now that Astarion’s attention was focused elsewhere. His expression looks identical to your own — caught in his own mind. Guilt. 

Did he feel guilty?

“Does anything—“ he pauses to clear his throat, “—anything hurt you?”

”Just my arms and legs,” you answer. Astarion nods, inhaling deeply and shifting in his chair. For some twisted reason, you want him to stand up and leave. Maybe it was to further prove your point, or maybe you just wanted to be alone. 

You’d never really know the true answer. 

He hums, nodding to himself before he shifts again. For a fleeting moment, he debates on whether or not he should stand and exit — it was clear that you wanted your space anyway. 

Astarion knew you … and he knew that right now, you certainly didn’t want him around. Never were you short with him, but your tone insinuated that you wanted nothing to do with him. 

Not that he could honestly blame you. 

And so, he stands from his chair. You don’t lift your head to look at him again … telling. 

“Why did you take so long to come for me?”

He freezes, feeling as though someone had doused him in freezing water. His back stands rigid; you could see the way that his spine visibly tenses the moment that his mind processes what it was that you had asked him. 

You snap your jaw shut the moment that the words fall from your lips, regret filling your senses. Sheepishly, you look down, staring at your lap and screwing your eyes shut. 

You freeze at the feeling of arms wrapping over your shoulders, tugging you against a chest that you had spent many nights resting against. His skin felt cold against yours, a welcome contrast to the heat that was currently making you very uncomfortable. 

Astarion’s cheek rests against the side of your head, his hands squeezing at your waist while also being mindful of the injuries that you had sustained. He sighs shakily into your hair, feeling himself relax as he feels you reciprocate his embrace. 

“The moment that I realized that I was not interacting with you, I went out to find you,” Astarion confesses, holding you tighter as he recounts the fear in the moment when he realized that you were not you. 

You remain silent, simply soaking up the comfort that Astarion’s arms provides you with. Your head rests comfortably in the junction that connects his neck and his shoulder, nose buried into his neck. 

“You have … absolutely no idea how frightened I was,” he whispers, his voice so low that it even the rustle of the blankets overpowered his words. His arms shake where they rest around your waist, his fingernails just barely digging into the exposed skin of your waist. “The prospect of losing you–”

“Astarion.”

He pauses, feeling you shift in his arms. Without any word of protest, he releases you, settling onto his knees on the bed in front of you. You adjust yourself, then reach out to take his hands into your own. 

Astarion flinches. You pause, waiting for him to say something to you. He doesn’t, and so you take it as an okay to continue. Your fingers squeeze his own, the action directing his eyes to your own. 

You stay silent for a second or two, simply taking in the way that Astarion’s eyes soften at you. His usually sharp scarlet eyes are glazed over now with a new emotion – guilt. Guilt over not being there for you, guilt over not saving you sooner …

… guilt that you had gotten hurt. 

“Darling, if I had the chance to save you sooner, know that I would have taken it without a second of hesitation,” Astarion admits, shifting an inch closer to you. You feel the tears building along your waterline, your teeth catching your bottom lip as you attempt to suppress the sobs that begin to bubble up somewhere in your chest. 

One of his hands releases yours, hesitantly laying against your face. He thumbs away the tears in your eyes, sighing as you crumple and reach for him again. Astarion doesn’t waste a single second, wrapping you in his arms and resting his chin against the top of your head. 

“I thought that,” you hiccup, “you and the others had forgotten about me.”

His arms tighten around you at that declaration, chest promptly collapsing it on itself as he realizes just how scared you had been. He doesn’t want to imagine what you must have been thinking in that cell, likely thinking about if you would ever be saved.

If he would ever come for you.

“Never,” he whispers into your hair, fingers stroking comforting circles into the small of your back. “I would never forget you, ever.”

“You are the first thing in my entire life that makes me feel … feel something. Something other than burning hatred. You make this wretched world worth living in.”

You squeeze at him, hands bunching up his shirt from behind. He doesn’t bring attention to it, letting you cling to him with as much force as you need. 

“And I’m not going to let you go. Not now, not ever,” he promises you. You close your eyes, sighing shakily through your nose. He can feel your nod against his chest, his cheek leaning further into your hair. 

And that night, when the glistening moon hung over your tent and signaled to your companions that it was time to rest, Astarion remained at your side – fulfilling his promise.

He wasn’t going to let you feel that scared again. Not now, not ever.

Promised Protector

Sypnosis - When a particularly pushy Araj begins to make Astarion revert to a past self that he had been trying so desperately to grow from, it leaves you to step in. It leaves Astarion with a small realization -- you did care for him, really truly cared for him.

Warning(s) - mature themes, foul language, mentions of abuse (physical and sexual), Araj being an ass, slightly OOC Astarion

Word Count - 1.8k

A/N - Trying my hand at BG3 fanfiction. I have yet to actually play the game, so I'm going purely based off of the playthroughs of others and random clips that I've found sprinkled around YouTube. I do plan to write more for this little vampiric shit, so y'all can leave requests for him as well!

“Must we be here darling? I’m not rather fond of dungeons with … medieval torture devices.”

You bite back the breathy chuckle in your throat as you continue forward, eyes expertly searching your surroundings to ensure that no creature in the dark would ambush you or Astarion. 

“For a creature that usually prefers the dark, you’re quite the complainer,” you bite back, tilting your head to cast a glance at the vampire over your shoulder. He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, shooting you a warning glare – one that you laugh off. 

“And for a creature as clumsy as yourself, you’re doing quite well in avoiding any potential traps.” Astarion’s eyebrow raises as you now shoot him a glare. His shoulders rise and fall in a nonchalant shrug as he moves to walk in sync with you, scarlet eyes scanning his surroundings before they allow themselves to return to you.

“I am not clumsy. It was one time,” you roll your eyes, continuing forward and clenching your jaw as Astarion dares to chuckle at your side. “Rich coming from the one who threw a tantrum even after I revived him.”

“Darling, need I remind you that you dropped an entire building on my head?” Astarion whips his head to the side to face you, his eyes narrowed now in a pointed glare that only brings a wide smile to your face. In any other situation, he too would have smiled simply at the sight of your own, but your revealed teeth only make his chest twist in faux anger. 

“And need I remind you that it was an accident?” 

“In what world is dropping a building on someone an accident?” Astarion murmurs under his breath, stopping when you do. Your eyes flicker to a figure standing just a few feet in front of you – a drow. 

She turns as your footsteps and Astarion’s become more audible, curiosity painting itself onto your face as you both approach. Her eyebrows raise, and you’re not sure if her expression is one of intrigue. 

“Hello,” you say politely, bowing your head in greeting as the drow eyes you curiously, irises raking over the entirety of your figure before they curiously flicker to peer at Astarion. 

“Araj Obladra, a pleasure,” the drow returns just as politely as you, her head dipping in the same bow that you had offered her. “How nice it is to stand in the presence of a True Soul … and her paled companion.”

Astarion’s eyes roll at the nickname, you catch it just out of the corner of your eye. But you choose to ignore it for the sake of not wanting to stir up any unnecessary drama – you had come to Araj for a reason, after all. 

“I’ve traveled to inquire about your services if you’re willing to provide them,” you explain, already noticing a glint in Araj’s eye. You’re not quite sure what expression it’s meant to convey, but from the way that she shifts from one foot to another, your gut tells you that it may not be the most positive. 

Another thing you notice … how her gaze continuously flickers to Astarion. 

“But of course,” Araj replies without hesitation, angling her body so that it faces Astarion rather than you. Your eyes narrow, brows momentarily pinching together. Just what was she playing at?

“You seem … interested in my pale friend here,” you think aloud, immediately wishing that you could swallow your words the moment that you register both Astarion and Araj’s reactions. 

“It is not every day that one encounters a vampire spawn,” Araj notes, the term bringing a disgusting taste to Astarion’s tongue. His nose scrunches in that same disgust, and for a moment, a flicker of anger dares to flare up within the depths of your chest. “After all, in exchange for blood, I craft potions.”

A hum rumbles in your throat, though you say nothing. Araj continues, choosing to ignore the expression you wear – the anger that you so clearly display. 

“All I truly need is a single drop, and then whatever potion you require … well, I can brew it,” she explains, finally moving from where she stands to circle you and Astarion. It reminds you of a predatory lion, one with slit-like pupils that eyes its prey before promptly pouncing on it. 

“And with the rest of it?” you prompt with a raise of your eyebrow. “My blood, I mean.”

“I shall keep it for myself … other potions need to be crafted, as you well know.”

She steps forward, extending her hand and holding her palm out to you. For a moment, you simply think, pondering whether or not you should even trust the drow – especially considering how her eyes still dared to flicker to Astarion. Why was she so interested in him?

You can sense Astarion’s worry from over your shoulder, the feeling rippling off of him like rolling ocean waves. But even with it, you lay your palm over Araj’s. 

“There, finished,” Araj says, already stepping back from you the moment that your skin comes into contact with her own. Her eyes, once again, meet Astarion’s. 

“And now wh—“

Araj’s attention turns completely now to Astarion, who momentarily falters underneath her gaze. His worry for you morphs silently into disgust directed at the drow. 

“There’s still much to discuss,” Araj comments, a smirk just barely pulling at the corners of her mouth. “Such as your paled companion.”

Astarion glances at you, and in return, he’s met with an expression of suppressed anger and jealousy — that would be a conversation for later, he dictates. 

“He’s a vampire, is he not? Or vampire spawn?” Araj’s eyes wander over Astarion, drifting down his entire body and ignoring the way that his eyes narrow in a glare at her. She turns then back to you, once again choosing to ignore the fury that glints in the depths of your eyes. 

“He belongs to you, am I correct?”

If you weren’t angry before, you were now. Your eyes flicker to Astarion, his expression a mixture of hurt and shock – it was one that you had never seen him wear before, and with the way it made your heart positively crack, you never wanted to see it again. 

“The last I checked, he was his own person,” you turn to Araj angrily, “he does not belong to anyone.” 

Araj bites back the chuckle that threatens to crawl up her throat, lifting a hand in front of her mouth as she laughs breathily into the skin of her palm. Your teeth grind against each other, jaw setting into place as the drow regains herself. 

“Oh, you were serious?” Her eyebrow lifts, the sight of it taking everything in you to not lunge at her and promptly wedge the blade of your dagger into the skin of her neck. “It’s adorable really … if he truly believes you, that is.”

Astarion swears he could hear one of your teeth chip with how roughly you set your jaw into place. His eyes wander down to your hands, taking note of how they clench into white-knuckled fists. Your fingers itch towards the blade in its holster, but you fight the urge to remove it. 

“Does your spawn have a name?” Araj shifts her attention back to Astarion, eyeing him once again. He opens his mouth to speak, but with a speed that feels almost inhuman, you answer for him. 

“His name is Astarion, and if you dare to call him my spawn again, I will surely–”

“Now, now darling!” Astarion’s hand closes around your mouth, palm pressing to your lips as he flashes you a too-sweet smile – hoping to whatever God was above him that you wouldn’t turn your anger onto him and plunge a dagger between his eyebrows. “Let’s be civil, yes?”

You bite back the angered insult that bubbles up in your chest, swallowing your words and settling back on your feet. Astarion nods, slowly removing his hand from your mouth before he turns to Araj.

“It’s been quite the dream of mine, being bit by a vampire … spawn or the like,” Araj explains, her tone taking on an almost dream-like lull. You can already feel the bile rising in your throat.

And it seems that Astarion shares your sentiment, what with the way that his eyebrows raised and his lips curled in that adorable little scowl. 

“I’ll have to decline,” Astarion is quick to answer, shaking his head and taking a tentative step away from Araj, almost as if he’s trying to hide his body behind your own. You allow it, going so far as to then sidestep him and stand protectively in front of him – an action that he smiles gently at. 

“I’ll compensate–”

“He said no, thank you very much,” you butt in, glaring down your nose at the overbearing drow. She falters on her feet for a moment, but just as quickly, she recollects herself. “We’ll be going now.”

You turn on your heel, reaching swiftly for Astarion’s hand before promptly leaving – not once sparing a glance to the disappointed drow over your shoulder. 

< … >

“Darling?” Astarion hesitantly lifts the flap of your tent, ducking beneath it and entering. You hum from where you sit at your desk, tilting your head slightly to show your acknowledgment. “Are you alright? Your lively presence was missed. You left me to deal with … them … on my own.”

You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose as you turn in your seat to look at Astarion. At the sight of your face, he falters, his expression softening. 

“You’re still upset over that vile drow, aren’t you?”

“Of course I am Astarion!” you rise from your place, throwing your hands up. He flinches, not having expected a violent outburst from you. 

“She … she thought that I had ownership of you! All because of what, the fact that you’re a spawn and not a vampire? The nerve of some creatures disgusts me! I mean honestly–!”

“Darling.”

You pause, head lifting so that your gaze finally meets Astarion’s awaiting gaze. His eyes are soft as they gaze at you, lips turned upward in a smile of equal softness. He approaches you, offering his hands to you – which you take without hesitation. 

“I want you to know that I … appreciate what you did for me today,” Astarion admits quietly, speaking low enough that you could barely hear him. “It has been many years since I was able to choose my own.”

You soften, squeezing at his hands. “Astarion, you deserve to have your own voice. Nobody should be able to control what you do besides … well … you.”

He draws you closer to his chest, arms locking around your waist as his face buries itself into your hair. You chuckle lightly, returning his embrace and laying your face against his shoulder. 

For 200 years, Astarion had never known the sound of his own voice. 

But now?

Now he knew the sound of it, and he knew that it mattered.