@na Motivation - Blog Posts
Let me just say that what this post says is everything. I'm living it. My fiancée is a "cook", food is his hobby and "flavor is everything" and he "won't go without flavor". He eats so badly; like everything you could imagine that you would think that someone shouldn't eat, he does. Fatty, fried, eating out, full of real cream and real butter and a whole heck of a lot of it. He drinks full fat milk by the gallon. He insists on a "sweet treat" after dinner. Bowls of cake with milk in it eaten like cereal. Pastries and cookies and pie every. single. day. on top of the rich food he cooks. Obviously he is overweight (not like....unable to move and function, but you know). He doesn't care. He literally has said that you cannot learn anything about a culture unless you eat their food. He wants to travel and do street vendors in different places. He wants to competitively eat. His existence is literally all about food.
Now, I'm one of those unfortunate people that have ED and never get thin. That's another rant. I keep telling him that I do not want to eat this food, it is too damn spicy or rich or whatever. I'm lactose intolerant (for really real), I have immune disorders that require me to take medication akin to a chemotherapeutic drug. I get sick easily. It literally is so beyond what my body can even tolerate that it's ridiculous. He says I'm unhealthy and need the things he cooks
See, the thing is....he has colitis and costochondritis. Basically everything he likes to eat is what he would call "bland" and he flat refuses to eat properly. He is literally ready to live and fall on that freaking hill of food. It makes me so freaking mad I want to scream because when he has flare ups he wants sympathy. I'm so sorry but I do feel bad that he feels bad; but when it comes to him wanting me to baby him I just can't. It feels like he does have an addiction and I'm helping him in this weird cycle of self destruction.
I don't want to be a part of that. And I feel like crap for it.
We really have to start facing food as a drug. We need to recover from it. We dream with food, but it is bad for us. We should start treating ourselves as we are addicts in recover, because that is what we are. Some people even think about food 24/7. Food makes us high for a few minutes, but then we really feel like shit afterwards. What is the point? We feel like we can not live without a burger, or a pizza, or a good greasy food, but we absolutely can. Food is one of the worst drugs ever. Don’t let it take you to your downfall.
Seeing my boyfriend be muscular and fit is just extra motivation for me to become the skinny, dainty, fragile girlfriend he deserves ‼️🔥
<3 ✨
I'm so mad I've been eating in a deficit of 800 cals for the past week and I have not been losing an ounce of weight it's just not going below that 55kgs mark, no it kept fluctuating between 55.5 and 55.1 even, I am so mad at myself I don't even know what's wrong
I'm gonna eat ice cubes, loads of them, as breakfast/lunch from now on because I keep eating instead of drinking water so I hope this'll help
<3 ✨
I did 50k steps today to make up for the 25k I didn't do yesterday. I'm gonna be honest, my right knee was already in bad shape, but now it's aching so much I'm close to crying lmao
Gonna take it slower from now on
Take care of yourselves! <3 ✨
Goal for myself to hit tomorrow: 25k+ steps
We gon' be power walking to the moon
<3 ✨
Fasting rn so my only meal of the day can be a tub of halotop ice cream muhahahahaha
-320 kcal
<3 ✨
I want to get so thin and sickly I land in the hospital or get taken out of my mom's home. I'm middle eastern so you know how the culture is, you're not allowed out of the house unless you're married.. I have an abusive father (his side of the family is insane too) and brother who both went to jail so if I move out without an excuse they'll kill me anyway so might aswell land myself in the hospital yk
It sounds dangerous but man it's probably the best idea I've had in a while
My mom got a hula hoop and it's such a fun way to get some exercise in for anyone that hates moving around (like me) 😭
<3 ✨
Omg now that I've gotten into the rhythm of liquid fasting I'm so at peace with myself I finally don't feel guilty or disgusting and I can indulge in my favourite beverage: diet coke!!
Lmao it was actually on sale today in stores and you KNOW I had to take my chance hahaha
Stay skinny! <3 ✨
I'm gonna set clear rules for myself from now on so I don't make any more exceptions
-water fast a minimum of 3 days a week
-no more than 800 calories a day
-try to eat around 500 a day
-no processed sugars
-8 glasses or 5 bottles of water a day
-if I binge I must fast for the next 5 days as punishment
-weigh ins I'll change to every week so I don't get demotivated
<3 ✨
today I binged really badly and I'm really not in the headspace to continue restricting for today, tomorrow I'm gonna water fast though, so wish me luck UPDATE/EDIT: My binge was around a 1100 calories I'd say and I burned 305 calories, so I change my mind I'm gonna restrict for the rest of the day and then starve for 5 days (water fast only) I've done this before I gained a bunch of weight last year and it worked charms, omg I'm so happy I didn't go further!!
<3 ✨
I ate breakfast this morning but I'm gonna fast for the rest of the day!! The breakfast was 245 calories (sandwich + small chocolate). I'm gonna go on a walk with my boyfriend after we're done working so I hope I'll burn all of it off! Stay positive <3 ✨
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
I will not succumb to gluttony
<3 ✨
I'm on my period and the cramps were so bad I impulsively ate a chocolate croissant.. 230 calories!!
That plus warm soup is ~370 cal in total (upped it to stay on the safe side)
Sigh, at least I'm gonna be burning calories at work
<3 ✨
Gonna update my CW weekly(decided to do it daily anyway) on this post to motivate me to keep goinngg!! It's fine if its stayed the same or hasn't changed much, that just means I gotta keep going harder
CW: 50.9kgs(I FINALLY GOT OUT THE PLATEAU 😭)
Keep going lovelies <3 ✨
I'll try to not fast often since I have a pretty busy schedule playing badminton and having music lessons on friday. I'll eat a piece of fruit before rehearsal I guess :p
Also, I really missed the hunger pains from having an empty stomach, feels better than any drug to me fr (not that I've ever done drugs so I can't even compare, really 💀)
That means my total cal for a piece of fruit would be lets say... 120 cal to be on the safe side yk bananas and such can go pretty high!
Much love today everyone <3 ✨
M34lsp0!!
Omg if you can, get this like broth type soup they're super low in cal and super filling, my favorite is the mushroom one atm :DD
Tastes heavenly with a few veggies on the side :p
Swe3tsp0
You can do it!!! Imagine the day you finally see that thigh gap getting bigger, your clothes fitting loose, your collarbone poking out of your beautiful skin. Do it for all the pretty privilege that'll come with ⭐ving yourself 💖💖💖
Good luck lovess <33
I don't even watch Demon Slayer but I was in awe when I saw him.
Day 2: How tall are you, do you like your height?
I'm 153 cm / 5 ft tall, and I do not like my height. Maybe it's because of my ED that I self-sabotaged myself and stunted my bone development/growth... I honestly don't know anymore. I pray that this isn't my permanent height.
Day 1: Stats
CW: 34 kg / 75 lbs
H: 153 cm / 5 ft
BMI: 14.5
☆⋆｡𖦹 °‧ ⋆౨ৎ˚ ⟡˖ ࣪
Manifesting self-control
I have a very exciting new discovery! Dance workouts! It might seem silly but they're actually making working out and burning calories fun and less torturous. I can burn 200 calories in less than an hour. They work much better than jogging in place. So very proud of that one, although... I did go over my 500 kcal limit today by a landslide, but I burned off all the excess!
P.S. Do you guys have any tips for any upcoming events? I have a party coming up tomorrow and a celebration the next day and I have not prepared at all. Should I try to adjust my kcals or just not focus on the food at all/avoid them?
Should I break my fast...? I'm a day and a half into it but I'm starting to feel really weak and have no energy at all. I can barely walk a few distances before my feet feel like their about to give in and feel like I'll drop if I don't stop for a break.
genuinely didn't think a plateau would happen to me. calories? in check. exercise? every day. plateau? couldn't be me.
and yet.
here we are.
so many of the reddit forums recommend eating at maintenance for a while and it makes me sick to even think about trying, so we're going to weigh and count everything obsessively again, not just the big/non-vegetable things, and lower the max daily calories to 800. i know that's actually a pretty high number for edblr, but 1000 had been working for me for so long…
wish me luck! almost excited to feel the pains again.
bro why can’t i just stop eating oh my GOD
hi guys!!!! i haven’t posted on tumblr in a while i’ve mainly been active on twt, but i attempted rec0very during february. it did not work out for me, and i have ga1n3d 10 Ibs since. my mental health is not the best right now and i will try to post more on tumblr. i’m trying to l0se the 10 Ibs this month, so far i have 8 more to go. but i hope you angels are all doing well, make sure to take care of yourselves, i love you all so much💗💗🪽
fave l3gsp0 <3
dm for removal! 💘