Cleopatra - Blog Posts
JFK’s hair is impossible to draw
Imagine if JFK was real😔
Binged clone high and now I’m obsessed
yall we gotta put some respect on emperor wu zetians name. my girl was the only female emperor of china like fucking EVER and all anyone ever talks about is queen elizabeth i or cleopatra or something. like. i LOVE THEM but they did not girlboss their way into role the way wu zetian did. my memory is a little bit fuzzy but i THINK that she somehow masterminded her way into power. anyways my queen wu zetian you will always be famous and people will end up being obsessed with you like i was
Started watching Cleopatra in Space and now guess who I ship ;DDD
Yes, I understand the Divine Comedy is all about Dante being upset about being exiled from Florence, Italy, but I can still be salty about him shitting on my favs (Cleopatra, Odysseus). The slut shaming of a political leader who slept with only two men (who FYI both slept with way more people) is disgusting!
DNI if you’re going to blather on about how “important” his work is.
Bad Ancient Rome Joke
Lissa Dragomir: So what do Mark Antony, Julius Caesar, and Cleopatra have in common?
Rose Hathaway: Threesome!
Lissa Dragomir: Can you honestly not take ANYTHING seriously?!
Rose Hathaway: It wouldn’t be as fun if I did.
Fulvia and Cleopatra
How the men chronicling history saw them:
-catfight over Mark Antony, Fulvia pining after Antony until she died
How they really interacted:
Fulvia: That Octavian guy is a manipulative twerp, so don’t trust him. I’m praying to Fortuna and Minerva you kick his ass into next week. It’ll make dying in exile worth it.
Cleopatra: I’d be willing to do that for you. Don’t worry about Antyllus and Jullus. I’ll look after them.
Fulvia: Oh, and just as a warning. Marcus snores louder than a herd of elephants.
Mark Antony: I don’t snore!
Fulvia and Cleopatra: Yes, you do!
Awesome fanart of Marcus Antonius a.k.a Mark Antony, Cleopatra, and Octavian.
I‘ve been designing the good ancient gang
Damn, this is both hilarious and accurate.
If the Romans and Friends Had Outgoing Voice Messages Part 2
Cleopatra: You have reached 1-800 That Bitch, and this is a message to let SOMEBODY (Antony) know that if he so much as TRIES to steal my takeout this time I will stab him in the eye
Octavia: Before you begin your message I'd like to apologize for anything my brother has done to provoke you, I am not responsible for him
Cicero: You have reached the only voice of reason left in this hellhole, please leave a message.
Agrippa: Marcus Agrippa, please leave a message. Sorry I can't come to the phone right now but I literally never have a moment free *depressed laugh*
A gruesome, but excellently drawn art of Mark Antony dying in Cleopatra’s arms.
Antony and Cleopatra
LOL. This is hilarious.
If the Romans and Friends Made YouTube Videos
Caesar: How NOT to Invade Britain
Antony: My Trip to Egypt (Gone Sexual)
Brutus: I Stabbed a Guy?? (EMOTIONAL)
Cassius: You Won't BELIEVE What I Convinced My Friend to Do (SOMEBODY DIED) (NOT Clickbait)
Cleopatra: Doing My Eye Makeup While I Prepare for War
Octavian: I Inherited an Empire (RIP Uncle Julius)
Pompey: We're Not Bros Anymore (GONE WRONG) (GONE VIOLENT)
Hell yes.
what people think cleopatra dressed like:
What Cleopatra actually dressed like:
Because Gods forbid a feminine woman is an accomplished leader.
I’m just gonna leave this here
History wants so badly for Cleopatra to be beautiful. Like they can’t conceive of Rome being intimidated by anything less
I saw The Lumineers the other day (my favorite band), and I can tell you that post-concert depression is real
Cleopatra was once smuggled to Caesar in a bed-sack
It’s a well known story recounted by Plutarch that Cleopatra, aided by her confidant Apollodorus the Sicilian, hid herself “full-length inside a bed-sack” to elude her brother Ptolemy’s guards and gain secret access to Julius Caesar at Alexandria in 48 BC. Allegedly, Cleopatra landed at the palace when it was already dark and Apollodorus tied up the bed-sack before carrying it indoors to Caesar. Cassius Dio notes simply that Cleopatra “sent for Caesar in secret” and that he was captivated by her beauty and wit, but he omits any smuggling device. This story may be victim to Plutarch’s signature dramatisation, but it is compelling nonetheless.
rant.
WHY-?
why is tragedy beautiful?
why is suicide glamorized?
why do we romanticize the Ophelias, Hedda Gablers, Cleopatras and Sylvia Plaths?!
why are Neil Perry and Daisy Randone fan favorites?!
WHY do so many queer stories end in sorrow?!
We are here to live! Dying is a consequence, not an aspiration!
YES!! momento mori, but so you can remember to enjoy life now, CARPE DIEM!!
Why when we can romanticize life, do we choose death?
Why do we choose to retreat from the warm caress of the sun and turn to the suffocating vice grip of the earth?
DEAR GOD WHY!!!!!
History wants so badly for Cleopatra to be beautiful. Like they can’t conceive of Rome being intimidated by anything less
Cleopatra from "Cleopatra in Space" as a mummy/zombie
Other Social Media:
DeviantArt
NewGrounds
Happy International Women's Day!
(In Brazilian Portuguese)
Image Source: Mykukla
Defining Cleopatra
Glory of her father Princess Goddess who loves her father Pharaoh Mistress of Caesar Whore Eternal love of Marc Antony Beloved Enemy of Octavian Foe
Framed by the men in your life You are seen most clearly in the Cobra you pressed to Your breast To escape them.
-Skye