Esmp S2 - Blog Posts
When Hermes told sausage and joel that they were bad parents I found it hilarious but I have made it my goal to turn it into angst here’s what I came up with
So Hermes became a teenager in a split second and was immediately overwhelmed with new strong hormone fueled emotions
He yells at his father’s and tells them that they are terrible parents
after he’s finished blowing up at them he fly’s off to cool down but when he finally returns his parents are gone and then don’t ever return
the last thing Hermes ever told his parents is that they were horrible and he hated them
And unlike us he has no clue why
Empires Smp Avenger au
Jimmy is called the the sheriff and the weapon he uses is a lasso the twist is that he was trained to use guns and Hand to hand combat from a young age but not a lasso as a result he makes a fool of himself getting tied up all the time by his own weapon so it shocks everybody when ever he picks up a gun or does anything else he’s been trained to do for most of his life
in the western movies he would watch as a kid the cowboys would use lasso’s so he decided to use a lasso and base his theme off of cowboys
even after he finds out he has fish powers he still dresses like a cowboy so if you where to see him in action you would be treated to the sight of a cowboy straight of of an old western controlling water and talking to fish like he’s aqua man
I don’t think season 2 Joel is a god but I do think the headcannon I’ve seen of Joel from season 1 and season 2 being the same person is true
I believe what happened was that after his palace was destroyed and his loved ones went missing joel searched for a purpose to distract himself from the grief
He still wanted to leave behind a legacy so he became obsessed with building his magnum opus a statue just like his citizens but so much more he would get giant muscles and be very tall and have the power of a god
he based the design off of myths like Zeus because he was inspired by his wife who was debatably a goddess also he used famous Greek sculptures as references
While He is the same Joel from season 1 he is not an immortal god like he claims he is It would be ironic because it would make him making fun of Jimmy for being a toy hypocritical
I also think the reason Joel targets Jimmy so much is because they used to be brothers in laws and he used to think Jimmy was a great ally and friend so seeing someone with the same face and even some similarities in personality being a corrupt sheriff well it infuriates him to no end
I thought of a hilarious situation for Hermes what if Joel one day choose to mess with jimmy by leaving Hermes in tumble town forced jimmy to be a babysitter or something
well turns out that Hermes because of the dolls Joel makes ends up being very receptive to all the cowboy things Jimmy let’s him do to keep him happy while he’s there
And joel doesn’t know it but it at first but there are consequences for the huge mistake he inflicted upon himself
because in doing that because when Hermes goes home he now wants to be a cowboy
and nothing Joel does gets him to stop the experience changed him now he always wears his hat that Jimmy made him and throws tantrums when someone try’s to take it and refuses to go anywhere if he doesn’t have the hat on
he turns into one of those kids that’s obsessed with a movie so he watches it over and over again and who’s parents are also forced to watch it or a kid with a special interest in wild west and he never stops talking about the topic
Hermes loved the dessert and him and his father can make rain storms so he doesn’t like the rain any more so he starts claiming to be the god of cowboys
when he gets older and he develops a unique domain he officially becomes the god of deserts and oasis’s patron of explorers and pioneer a guide to those looking to start journeys and facings trials
Empires smp season 2 sheriff jimmy headcannon
My headcannon is that as a child jimmy was a homeless orphan ignored by everyone
After his mother died he lost hope and just focus on staying alive until one day a group of kids visited the village it was big news and everyone came out to see the sight because the kids that visited where royalty from far off kingdoms future rulers
Jimmy saw how everyone stopped what they where doing just so they could get a glimpse of the promising youngsters and he was struck with longing to be noticed like them
From that day onward he made it his goal to become an emperor so people would love him like his mother used to
he dreamed up tumble town a place where he wouldn’t be an outcast and where people would respect him
He chose to settle in a dessert because in the town when it would rain due to not having a shelter he would get soaked and his belongings would risk being ruined
Because he was homeless he never when to school he only recently learned to read
In the town where he grew up there was a very wealthy family that had a young daughter named kirsty
kirsty was always told by her snobby parents to stay faraway from the dirty scrawny kid she would see sometimes around town and she did as she was told until one day she got lost in the woods she was scared and alone but then she found a cave in the cave was jimmy’s “home” she didn’t question it she was taught not to question anything if it benefited her
She took a look around and found many things food taken from the garbage, a poorly made cowboy hat and drawings of a sherif surrounded by townsfolk and adorned by them all
Then Jimmy returned at first he was embarrassed but then she started to ask about his plans and he started sharing the two of them talked until the Time came for him to show her back but that wasn’t the end of there friendship it was just the beginning
Kirsty would stop by whenever she could not telling her parents of course they would approve of her friend she was supposed to be learning to be proper lady a perfect example of a southern bell in the making not out climbing trees or digging in trash for food and other things to help jimmy
as the days went by she started to feel trapped jimmys enthusiasm inspired her his want for more made her want more
She encouraged jimmy to share his plans with others they started to recruit people Jimmys passion of infectious
Soon enough they started to put the plan into motion kirsty funded most of it but the others helped to so the pioneers set out to create tumble town
Jimmy has dedicated his life to tumble town and as you can imagine is terrified he will be replaced and cast out once again after all he was the outsider that went from the bottom straight to the top
he over works himself a lot trying to build the buildings and do all the paperwork so he doesn’t have to ask others because he feels he might loose their support and they will leave if he oversteps and pushes them away
I headcanon Joel to be the opposite he was born into health and and influence he much like kirsty was excepted to be a dignified and perfect from birth
Once he was put in charge he was finally free to do what he wanted he was like those kids that are super restricted and when they rebel they go way overboard
So Jimmy and joel are complete opposite
one had responsibility and devotion thrust onto him and the other had to fight tooth and nail for it
one craves the approval of other while the other stopped caring about what others think a long time ago
HELLOOOOO CAN YOU HEAR MEEEE
are you a creative in the esmp community?
well, let me introduce you to the esmp gift exchange! this will function like a normal gift exchange! you’ll send in a few options for what you’re willing to as a gift, and what you are willing to make as a gift, and then we assign you a giftee and assign someone else to make a gift for you!
please reblog this so people who may be interested will be able to find it !!
interest check (and more information) will come out in a week, so follow us to keep an eye out for that :)
Day #1!!! Just a little Pix today since I dont know tons about him but I'm super excited for these next 2 weeks :D @empiresweek
All Reigns Come To An End
It's over now.
Joey disappeared into the sunset. The sea churning below, wind in his hair. The rhythmic action of rowing the boat calmed him. No matter what, the sea would always call to him like the sirens that lived in its majestic waters. He was glad to not be alone. With others by his side, traversing the sea was even better.
Joel had ascended. He'd always known Jimmy was a toy; that reassurance wasn't exactly needed, but was satisfying. And even if Hermes...didn't seem to like him, at least his son was grown up now. And everyone left him. So he made his goodbyes and joined the other Lore Gods.
Scott and Owen were adventuring together. Scott delighted in the thrill of the risk; the dangers that came with raiding tombs and collecting things. Even if that skull came to mind, Owen was always there to comfort him. He was rarely afforded privacy with Owen, but he didn't mind. They both did things for Chromia, even though Scott definitely did more. Adventure called to them both, and they were kindred spirits bonded together with it.
Shelby eventually chose her track of magic. Lightning coursed through her veins, and the storms bent to her will. She grinned as the rain poured outside her home. That date with Katherine had been wonderful. Perhaps she could go on one with her later. But that letter in her letterbox wouldn't read itself.
Katherine's curse was gone now. Even though her parents weren't too keen on her monster-hunting, the monsters would always exist. Who else would get rid of them? She delighted in protecting her kingdom. And visiting Shelby didn't sound too bad. She did promise a date after all.
FWhip smiled as the racket of the tavern filled his ears. Downing another goblet of mead, he wiped his mouth with his hand and joined the drunkards in their joyful melody. Ecstasy rode through his veins and he did nothing to stop it. Surrounded by friends, he eased into his own comfort.
Pix was satisfied. He'd done everything he'd wanted. Pride flowed through him as he looked upon everything he had accomplished and he couldn't resist the relieved grin that curled at his lips.
Jimmy protected Tumble Town as best he could. The Old Sheriff was brilliant to be around, if not a little odd from time to time. He was content. Sure, there'd be bandits one way or another. The law would always need upholding. But for now? Rest sounded good. And being with the Old Sheriff? Seemed like a nice ending to him.
Oli's Olipeligo was beautiful. His own refuge. His home. Old memories of old faces still popped in from time to time, but he didn't need them. Memories of the Orb, of vampires and angels, of thornlings and dragons, had all but gone now. Replaced by collectors and princesses, by sheriffs and gods and goblins.
Everyone's reign was over. Would new ones begin, or were the history books finally complete?
For now, their reigns had come to an end.
It was over now.
Beach Day
The sun in Tumble Town was scorching. The air was hot and heavy as tumbleweeds rolled through the streets. The tavern teemed with life, many coming to hear stories or play games or just to relax with a drink and forget about their troubles. Children ran about playing games within their imagination; some took on the roles of mighty dragons or fearless warriors, powerful witches and royalty. No tiny corner of stories was free from the whimsical nature of each fickle child running amok.
And away from it all, down at the lagoon, two rulers were finally starting to relax.
Sausage wasted no time in gleefully diving into the water. With a comically large grin on his face, he plunged into the lagoon and let out a mighty laugh as the cool water collided with his skin. He resurfaced, shaking his head. His hair, now wet, fell over his eyes, some parts sticking to his forehead.
Scott followed soon after. A peculiar mix of reckless elegance, he leapt into the water with a ginormous splash. The water felt natural around his skin. Familiar and inviting. For a second he could feel the phantom feeling of scales on his skin and gills. But just as quick as it came, the feeling dispersed like a school of fish approached by a predator. He, too, resurfaced with a calm grin. His eyes sparkled with delight.
The two rulers laughed. They could forget their duties to their homes for now. Because they weren't rulers at the moment. They were just two friends enjoying themselves on a hot day.
Neither had paid much attention to the cod statue. It set off an untouched part of their minds, scratching at an itch they didn't even know existed. Seeing the statue felt satisfying, in some way. They couldn't explain the feeling that washed over them, but chose to blame it on the heat and the water.
And as Scott had pointed out, their tattoos did form a heart. A heart of colour and vibrancy, and of a floral beauty rooted to the earth. The whimsy of magic and all of its bizarre and wondrous reaches, and the nature of existence in sentience and material.
It didn't take long for Jimmy to spot them both. Seeing two shirtless men at a lagoon wasn't exactly common in Tumble Town. Nor were the tattoos that either man possessed. No resident in Tumble Town had a tattoo so bright and colourful, nor one so floral and rooted. He was able to identify both of these men almost immediately.
They welcomed Jimmy with open arms and a bright smile. And after a bit Jimmy joined them in the water with the (mandatory) adopted goblin child with him.
Soon afterwards fWhip joined them. And whilst the goblin ruler did not really go in the water that much, he was still pleasant company.
And even though the sun was setting, it had no effect on the quartet. No sunset would dampen their joy because their joy reached further than the farthest horizons.
Alas, they had to depart. They did have their own homes to rule after all.
But they wouldn't forget their beach day, no matter how distant and foggy that memory would become.
Woes Of A Thieving Parent
The child just wouldn't sleep.
Scott had awoken from his slumber for the umpteenth time that night to the sound of a wailing goblin baby. He threw the covers back and his feet slipped onto the cold floor of his manor. Shuffling forwards, he reached for his trusty jacket hung up nearby and his signature fedora. Now he was dressed (well enough), Scott left the confines of his room.
He had given the kid its own room. The point of this was to have it be somewhere else so he wouldn't have to hear it screaming constantly. But that plan had flopped almost immediately. Now pretty much the entirety of Chromia could hear the small goblin child cry out in the midst of the night.
Scott was not parenting material.
Why couldn't fWhip deal with his own population burst? Scott found himself cursing Goblands under his breath as he gently nudged open the door to the child's room.
The goblin child had its arms and legs waving in the air, kicking and reaching out for hands that would never hold them. Its ears were tilted downwards as opposed to the usual upward point of most goblin ears.
He drowsily approached the child's crib and picked up the baby. How was he meant to hold a baby again? Scott had been to many places in the past and stayed with many people. At least one time he had lived temporarily with newly-made parents and a young baby. He barely recalled the way that both parents had cradled their baby and rocked it back and forth.
Maybe he could try that?
Scott gingerly shifted the baby's position in his arms to something reminiscent of what he had seen during his days of travelling. The baby's wails were still ear-splittingly loud, but slightly more bearable. He rocked the baby back and forth gently. What else had those parents done when he lived with them? Sing it a lullaby?
Oh. Oh they did do that.
Scott's dignity was going to die tonight, wasn't it?
Hesitant, Scott began to mumble a lullaby under his breath. It was one he somewhat remembered. One from his childhood. He couldn't recall who exactly it had been to sing it to him, but the voice sang alongside his own as he repeated it to this child.
At least the child's screaming was quieter. Now instead of screaming and crying at the top of their lungs, the goblin child babbled faintly. They made grabby hands and poked Scott's cheeks as he sang. Resisting the urge to pull away, he kept singing.
It took him a moment to realise the child had stopped screaming.
The child had nuzzled their head into Scott's chest and was babbling jovially. Eventually the young goblin's head dipped down further as slumber finally overtook them.
He did it. Scott got the child to sleep.
With a silent cheer, Scott placed the goblin child back in its crib. The child's breath hitched from the sudden loss of warmth. Its tiny green body shivered.
Scott sighed in defeat as he took off his jacket and wrapped it around the goblin child. Was the term swaddled?
If he had ever thought of handing the goblin child off to his people, he certainly wouldn't be able to go through with it. The child's hands gripped his jacket tightly and its ears were finally tilted up in the usual sign of contentment. Even more, the goblin child almost seemed similar to Scott, despite the difference in species. The goblin baby's eyes had taken on a mild teal hue, with one eye ever so slightly yellow around its pupils.
Damn it. This was his kid now, wasn't it?
Scott never thought he could be a parent. The option was never really available. Not when he was constantly on the move. Constantly running, whether it be from the consequences of his actions or even the law. Back then, he only ever wanted to travel and 'collect' things from everywhere.
Love never crossed his mind. Mainly because he knew he'd screw up. Betray them, cheat on them, steal from or scam them, run out on them in the dead of night. Or he would abandon them at the smallest hint of misfortune. There had been many instances from the past when Scott had left behind a multitude of lovers because of his desire for adventure and his cowardice.
Children were new to him. The prospect of now having a child to raise, on his own no less, was alien to him. He had always turned away at the prospect of kids. The best he could do was tell tales of his adventures to the children of whichever village or town he resided in.
The child's eyes fluttered open for a milisecond, and they smiled at him with a naivety and joyful innocence only a kid could have.
Scott hesitated. Then before he could second-guess himself, he pressed a small kiss to the goblin child's forehead.
He wanted to leave the room. To go back to bed.
But just in case the child woke up again, Scott wanted to be nearby.
So he slept on the floor. For the sake of his child. Not because he wanted to ensure it was safe throughout the night.
Scott got comfy on the cold floor and removed his fedora, clutching it tight against his chest.
He would figure out the whole parenting thing eventually.
He still hadn't given the child a name, had he?
Murder Mystery AU?
Since Pix withered away and lost the crown, I had this AU forming in my head. I wanted to get it out here, and I'm working on a fanfic of this AU for myself. I might post some chapters, but I might just leave it as this.
Suspects: Scott, Katherine, Sausage, Shelbie, Joel
Detectives: Jimmy, fWhip
Victim(s): Pix, maybe Joey and Lizzy
Side characters: Oli, Gem, False
Pix would get murdered either at his museum, or at the tea party Katherine held. Jimmy would arrive a couple hours later, and the investigation would begin. Scott would be interviewed first seeing as he just acquired the crown Pix had before. Katherine hosted the event, so she'd be second on the list. Sausage handed out drinks, so if the cause was linked to poison then Sausage would also be interviewed. Shelbie would've been seen acting off after the death, which would make her a mild suspect. And Joel would be interviewed by fWhip because Joel would mock Jimmy to death before spilling any important info.
Joey or Lizzy could die next, Lizzy as a means of hurting Joel, and Joey as a means of directing the murderer to Shelbie or Katherine.
Oli would try to calm the group down, and would offer some help to Jimmy and fWhip, but ultimately wouldn't help much. However, he would still be useful as he'd be the one to potentially intervene during a heated argument between the cast.
False would provide some insight into Pix just...as a character, and try to provide motives for the others. She'd mostly try and stay out of the whole thing, but would pitch in when called upon.
Gem would give a detailed account of the night and be a useful witness, because I think she'd be observant enough to notice some small details prior to Pix dying.
That's it! It's not a ton of stuff, but I still think it's pretty fun.
Bye, have a great day/night!