Flinthamilton - Blog Posts
“this is not what i wanted”
black sails, 2014-2017
“seeing a dog in the rain,” laura gilpin
I completely agree. It may seem sudden and it surely is unexpected, at least it was for me, but once you know it you finally can put all the pieces into place and that's just wonderful. I love this show for this thing they do of leaving nails all around and then giving wire to connect them all.
And yeah, that episode is not only a great work speaking about directory and scenes and all, but is also what definitely caught me in the Black Sails' web. Sure, the show has a lot of interesting point and themes that keep you into it, but making the main character bisexual in a pirate show and making of his lost love the cause of his whole fight and rage? Well, let's just say that their braveness was definitely rewarded. Absolute geniouses.
one time I looked up the ratings of each episode of black sails. I expected to see s2e5 near the top, but I wasn’t exactly surprised when it was actually at the bottom (free us from the clutches of homophobia man). I read some of the comments and they were saying that the reveal felt out of nowhere. Okay, so actually you just have no media literacy skills. For me, the revelation made so much sense that I experienced something akin to ascension. I felt I had unlocked all of the knowledge there was to unlock. My whole engagement with the show changed. That thing that had been bubbling under the whole time, in every interaction between Miranda and flint, in every mention of Thomas, in every display of rage from flint, in each one of his desperate schemes.
I just find it so hilarious that people thought it was out of nowhere? Louise Barnes and Toby Stephens were actually the only two cast members aware of the backstory from the beginning of the show, and you can see it so much in the way they act their characters. So much unspoken, but that doesn’t mean it’s not there. Season 1 ep 7 — that whole altercation they have where he refuses to apologise to England, the way she says ‘if he were here he’d agree with me’, the tension of it all. The note Thomas wrote in the front of their copy of meditations? It’s so obviously not out of the blue, it’s set up so brilliantly so as to evade perception but also to lodge itself in your brain before you even know what *it* is.
Tom Hopper (Billy) said it was the best episode of television he’s ever seen. Literally years later, in a promotional interview for the umbrella academy. I agree wholeheartedly.
saying that it was out of nowhere is just wrong. It’s either a) just a guise for your homophobia or b) a betrayal of your evidently terrible media literacy and critical analysis skills.
When I saw the episode so many things from season 1 finally clicked in to place inside my head. The enigma of Flint, for the first time, began to slightly unravel.
In ep.IV they show us this embrace, this beautiful, beautiful and painful scene. Those few seconds hold such a deep meaning…and yet in that moment we do not know ANYTHING about it. So what? Is one supposed to see it and then go on with the show and forget about it, putting it in a corner of their mind with all those “you will understand later” things? Because that’s what happened, the first time I watched this season I completely forgot about it. And that’s such a WASTE! Pretty much all of the Flint/Miranda’s scenes in the first season are a waste, in a way. Please do not misunderstand me, I think those scenes are really amazing and I also think that the timing of the “great revelation” was perfect, I wouldn’t have liked it so much had it come before, and exactly for these reasons I’m saying that those wonderful scenes are “wasted”. Because a lot of those get lost in the first watch, since one can’t understand the importance of them still and so doesn’t even give them the right amount of attention they would deserve. Of course the mystery was intriguing, and something sounded pretty strange since the beginning, but still…STILL. Almost all of the scenes about the two of them or about Miranda kill me on rewatch, knowing their whole story. But that’s the thing, you have to rewatch it to get the complete beauty of them. And I think that’s a shame, because people who like the show but are not obsessed with it as I am would probably never rewatch it, but maybe, if they had remembered or rewatched at least those scenes, there would be one more chance for them to be as obsessed as I am with it.
Really, how beautiful this hug was? An “It’s over” kind of hug, but with a double meaning. It’s over like we put an end to part of our misery, venting our anger on the responsible for it, but also, it’s over like our old existences are over, and we will never be the same persons we used to be ever again. Which is pretty much what happens with every revenge (I’m not judging though). I just love it so much, I wish I had been able to see all of that since the first time I saw it.
Work of art. I feel glad to have this artist both in dolls and Black Sails communities. I couldn't wish for anything better (honestly, I never thought I'd have found BS' custom dolls, and instead...what a gift!).
[id: 4 photos showing a doll sized version of james flint’s copy of meditations. 1st photo: a custom flint doll, shirtless in black pants, holds the book in front of him as if showing it to someone. 2nd photo: taken over the doll’s shoulder. The book sits open on a wood shelf (that looks like a desk to the doll) held open by the doll’s hands to the page with the inscription “James My truest love. Know no shame. T. H.” 3rd photo: the same as the 2nd but this time the book is open to the title page reading “Meditations. Marcus Aurelius” 4th photo: also the same but open to a page in the middle of the book, both sides printed with lorem ipsum fake text. End id]
Took a side quest to make flint’s copy of meditations :) My 1st time bookbinding (since an art class in high school) Yay! And i just happened to have a scrap of (genuine!) red leather that was the perfect size for the cover. The pages are printed on paper i tore out of an old book i was getting rid of anyway, and, in the tradition of barbie books, newspapers, etc, each page is printed with lorem ipsum text.
When Miranda gives back Meditation to Flint in episode XIII, they somehow make you think that he hadn't seen nor read that book in a while. Of course it was related to Thomas and he remembered that very clearly, but Miranda was the one to keep it and she is the one to say it was a precious thing she shared with her husband and all, over the general tendency of Flint to distance himself from the past, if not ideologically at least emotionally. But in truth, in ep. III he got what Miranda was reading from a single sentence overheard through the door...I mean, he had to know that book pretty well to do that. In fact, I've always liked to think about that book as some sort of comfort through the darkest hours for him as well as it was for Miranda, for what it means as an object at least if not for its philosophy which, as much as in line with Thomas' mind , I believe was pretty far from James' point of view.
I'm honestly relieved by the fact that they somehow confirmed this headcanon of mine. Like...yeah, some parts of his mind try to obscure the past in order to survive, but since he cannot separate himself from something which has defined him deeply he may as well find comfort in what is left of it.
That's so heartbreaking, but I love the way they orchestrated since ep.I his whole story.
Lately I found myself thinking about James/Miranda relationship as a reversed version of Orpheus and Eurydice’s story, especially towards the end of it. Not because these two stories match well (they do not) but just because I like making this kind of classical comparisons and I'm stuck from a bit on the fact that, right before her death, for the first time Miranda was the one to refuse the progress to look back at the past.
After the loss of Thomas, James let himself slip into a darkness comparable to the underworld, a darkness which so often threatened to swallow him whole. He walked on a thin line between a reign of death and an island of life, and if that darkness was that reign, Miranda was his island.
During their whole journey of processing their grief and climbing their way back to a life that could be called such, she was the one always trying to drag him towards the light. To her, the life that might have been waiting for them in the future was that light, while the past was the darkness, and not because she deemed it forgettable or unimportant, quite the contrary indeed, but because while she knew how to keep and remember the beauty of that past and the light of it, along with the sorrow, she knew perfectly well how different it was for James. How he could remember the beauty of it, of course, but also knew how to put it aside in favor of the rage and the guilt, his gaze clouded by the pain and the unacceptable shame.
She said it herself: she didn't want to forget that past, not the bright side of it and neither the inescapable sadness of it, its tragedy being the spring of that very beauty, the ruins existing only because there was something precious to be ruined in the first place; and at the same time, what could the dark of it matter, the injustice, the grudge, when it condemned the both of them to never be able to see the light again?
First time I heard their discussion in ep.VII after knowing the whole story, I wondered how could she ask something like that of him, to forget and pass over what they had done to him just to gain a liveable life, but recently I've actually been wondering : how could she not?
I'm not taking any side in this, as I recognize Miranda's thoughts to be the most reasonable ones as they often are but at the same time I can't say I wouldn't act as stubbornly and desperately as James did in that situation, they're just really different ways to conceive one’s own existence, influenced by their own problems and conditions and mind. All I'm saying is that Miranda was able to see the light even if just from a distance, she was able to hope that one day they would have been able to truly see it. James was never.
He just lied to himself about the possibility of it. He had plans and tactics and strategies, but for how I see it, those were all desperate attempts to convince himself of the contrary. He couldn't, maybe because of his personality, maybe because he knew that his situation wasn't one that could ever allow him to found real light in that world, maybe just because he loved her less than how much he had loved Thomas, less than how much she loved him, but whichever was the reason, he couldn't afford to see the light after that abyss, and I think Miranda was the first to know that. The one who knew him like no other, the one who loved him like no other. She knew that without help he would have never really been able to reach the end of that dark state of being. And she tried. She tried to help him in so many ways, because she loved him, she really did, and because she had the damn right to claim at least a decent life for herself.
And here we come to the end, to Charles town.
Charles town could have been her success. Charles town was James’ surrender. For the first time she glimpsed one real chance of having him back, she saw in him the real intention to leave all of that darkness behind, to follow her, not leaving the past behind, never, but learning to move forward, finally allowing her a chance for a new life together.
He was actually ready to accept even that miserable condition Peter Ashe imposed on him in order to get rid of the darkness, to climb to the light -as short lived as that might have been, at this point- to give Miranda a better alternative than the ones he had been able to grant her up until that moment (as I think his whole Charles town plan was led by the purpose of doing something to save her): as useless as we all know that would have been, accepting that bargain has probably been the most selfless thing James has ever done, even if he did it also for himself in a tired, desperate and contorted way.
But Charles town wasn't only this to Miranda.
Charles town was the discovery of the betrayal, because I believe she understood it all the moment she first saw that clock, I'm sure of it. Charles town was her umptheen attempt and her umptheen sacrifice.
I think that must have been to her a similar quest to the Maria Aleyne's one: respecting James by telling him the truth, something he deserves to know, even knowing how he will react to it, knowing how impossible it would become for him, then, to go on with his plan, granting him a one way ticket to that darkness, or keeping him in the dark, bearing alone the weight of that knowledge, accepting to live with the helplessness to remedy that fatal injustice, only in the hope to finally make him reach that light?
Would Orpheus reveal Eurydike a truth which risked pushing her back into the underworld just because it might be right for her to know it?
Still, things had been different, more desperate, back to the Maria Aleyne. Now the chance to succeed was real.
And at first she made that difficult choice, which was selfish in a way, but definitely selfless in another, all at the same time.
And she did it because she loved him.
She loved him so much that when she glimpsed, in that light, the prospect of losing him, she had to recognize that that light was -as James would have put it in the future- only their light, the light of a world the two of them couldn’t be part of anymore.
She loved him so much that she had to look back. To the past, to him, because her James was still behind her, still in the dark, the only place where he was allowed to stay, and only that version of him was the one she truly loved. She loved the real James, with all his broken parts, not the one that could be seen under the lights of their lies.
So she couldn't help giving up that false light, because she had wished for tranquility, a normal life -as probably anyone in her conditions would have done- but she was not disposed to give up the man she loved in order to gain that, as she hadn't been in the past, when the prospect of the future had been only dark and still she had not deserted the ones she loved.
And when she turned back, this time trying to shield him from that light, the darkness at the pit ended up swallowing them both.
Miranda died, and James was dragged back full force and imprisoned into the worst version of himself, the ruthless, autodestructive one.
There are two versions of the story of Orpheus and Eurydice, and I think that the two of them taken together perfectly represent James’ reaction to her death and its circumstances.
In Virgilius’ one, Eurydice slightly resents Orpheus for his action, for his “folly” -as it is called- and (if we may call it that) for his selfish gesture of looking back, that she paid with her second chance to be alive.
After Miranda's death, James dreams of her reminding him how he had resented her “because they were so close” and of course since that's a dream is what he knew he had felt. But that was…collateral to the condition he had been left stuck in. That was the childish resentment of having explicitly denied something he knew deep down he couldn't have.
In Ovidius’ one instead Eurydice doesn't blame him because she can't resent being loved, and I think this is what James really felt. After all, looking straight at the truth of the situation and looking back at their shared history, I think there were no ways for him to actually, rationally resent her. (And in fact in his last dream about her she uses a past tense, “you resented me”, hinting that was something he had felt only in the moments when he was at his worst as when, always in the dream, he heard her apology).
Moreover, I think he perfectly understood the meaning of those last moments of hers, how important it was to her to make her voice be heard in that moment. In fact, despite the clear and growing doubt and rage (and worry) on his face while Peter and Miranda spoke, he didn't say a word, he let her speak, despite knowing the risks and I think this is amazing and just proves how beautiful and respectful their relationship was, and that there were no way he could actually deem her responsible of their failure in that mission (doomed to failure since the beginning ‘cause of the truth).
What hurts even more about her death is the fact that it looks like they got closer to each other once again during that trip, as they hadn't probably been in years, and then…everything got lost forever.
So beautiful and hearwarming! It would be amazing if Madi went freeing them, I think the three of them would make a great squad.
They deserve that freedom and the happiness which comes with it. Sometimes is useful to read things like this. It makes one feel better, even if I can hardly imagine it coming true.
Happy Thomas Resurrection Day
I wrote a little short thing in celebration. All prompts to be handled shortly - I’m in a writing mood!
It has been a long time since Thomas Hamilton had the luxury of caring about smells. He recalls his first night in Bethlem Royal Hospital all too well for so many reasons, but high on the list is the appalling stench of the place. He recalls retching over and over again that first night - soiling the rough uniform they had forced him into and earning himself a qualification as a messy patient, something which he had come to regret in later months as he sat in his cell, dressed in little more than rags, huddling in the straw. He has long since learnt to disregard any and all smells that might have disturbed him in his former life - and so it takes him quite by surprise when the scent of the sea, complete with its faint edge of the dead things that have washed up overnight but without the heavy reek of the Thames, strikes him all at once. He breathes it in, and feels something in him ease- as if it had taken this to assure him at last that he is still breathing, still here -
Still tangible and alive.
“Thomas?” James asks, and Thomas shakes his head, struck speechless as he stands on the shore for the first time in years, staring at the ship that is going to take them away from this shore - away from all that they have both suffered and into a new life.
“Forgive me,” he croaks, and swallows hard. “Forgive me,” he repeats. “I - had no idea not smelling tilled earth any longer would affect me this way.”
James blinks.
“There’s - a strange sort of symbolism in that, I suppose,” he acknowledges, and Thomas stands, dumbstruck for a moment at the eloquence of his husband’s statement.
He has been dead to the world for ten years. He has smelled earth - worked it, been covered in it for so long. His fingernails have been crusted with it, his hands turned black and brown as it’s been ground into his skin. He’s been buried - buried before his time, before the breath has left him, with no coffin, even, to shield him, and he suddenly feels as if he has just, finally, burst free of his premature grave only to find himself not thirty feet from freedom such as he has only dreamt of in his fitful, disturbed coma. He turns, and kneels, allowing the sea water to run over his fingertips, then raises them to his nose. He is alive, and he suddenly wants to splash out into the swell, bathe himself in the ocean, allow it to wash the past ten years off his beleaguered, dirt-encrusted skin and his battered psyche.
“Do you think,” he asks, taking a deep breath, “that there’s time for a bath, before we leave?”
James looks at him, and then at the water.
“That’s going to be colder than you think it is,” he warns, but doesn’t sound like he has any real expectation of dissuading Thomas from his goal. In fact, he’s looking at the water speculatively himself, and then at Thomas, who grins at him.
“I might need supervision,” he says. “I think you should come and make certain I don’t drown.”
“We have a few hours before nightfall,” James agrees, and Thomas feels a thrill of possibility run through him - even as he recalls that they are not entirely alone.
The ship in the bay, after all, will not surrender itself to two men. Thomas turns toward their ragged crew of escaped convicts, and the stronger men that Madi has brought with her to their rescue. He looks to Madi herself, who stands, one eyebrow raised in amusement.
“I will take the men further up the inlet,” she says to both of them. “Do not make me come looking for you in the dark.”
James blushes - actually blushes, and then the princess turns, and walks away, and Thomas’ grin widens.
“Shall we?” he asks, and James gives a huff of helpless laughter, and then they are both laughing, stripping their shirts off and going splashing into the water. There will be grime in their hair tomorrow and they will both need a new set of breeches, but for now, they are joyful, cleansed with the salt, renewed, refreshed -
Resurrected.
"She loved the sea for its storms alone, and the green only when it grew scattered among ruins."
G. Flaubert
Miranda Barlow's aesthetic.
I love so much this character and her story and I think she would have liked very much Madame Bovary if she had the chance to read it.
(We all know what was written in that burning letter, don't we? I think it was important to include that too about her)