Jacob: You're pretty dumb.
Stanley: Thanks.
Jacob: Why are you thanking me? I just insulted you.
Stanley: All I heard was "You're pretty", I'm focusing on the positives in life.
Stanley: *Clearly high* Do you ever get like... Irritated by flower powder?
Jacob: You mean pollen...
Stanley: ...
Stanley: Flower powder.
Stanley: I hate you with every inch of my body.
Jacob: Those are not many inches.
Stanley: You're smiling. Did something good happen today?
Jacob: Can't I just smile because I feel good about it?
Dina: Syd fell at school today.
Stanley: How much did you spend on this date?
Jacob: $1400. But all if it's on credit cards, so it's like $5 a month for the next 2,000 years.
Stanley: ...
Jacob: Go fuck yourself.
Stanley: Fuck me yourself, you coward.
Jacob: *Already taking off his clothes* You asked for this.
Stanley: This is the weirdest foreplay ever.
Syd: *To Miles* You and Fraser are cute together
Miles: Aw thanks Syd
Syd: But you’re not as cute as Jacob and Stan
Miles: *Sighing* I know
[Stanley and Jacob texting]
Jacob: What are you doing?
Stanley: Laying in bed, what are you doing?
Jacob: Eating cereal.
Stanley: Ha ha nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you?
Jacob: Eat my cereal.
Stanley: Lol I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
Jacob: Go get cereal?
Syd: What do you get when you mix a hormonally unbalanced and emotionally unstable person with a little ray of sunshine?
Stanley: Do i look like i know?
Syd: I’m talking about you and Jacob!
As creator and founder of the janley, I declare Wildflower as the Janley anthem
https://youtu.be/07RHI4MDQ-U
Then Jacob and Stanley start dating, one afternoon Meg discovers them kissing on the street and the only way Jacob finds so that Meg does not say that he is gay, is making Stanley sell her weed to buy her silence.
Jacob: Spell "me*
Stanley: M - E
Jacob: You forgot the D
Stanley: What? There is no D in me
Jacob: Not yet
Stanley: *Walks through the door carrying a big box*
Syd: What's in the box? A robotic girlfriend?
Stanley: I don't need a robotic girlfriend, I assure you, in twenty years I will be Jacob's second husband.
Jacob: What will happen to my first husband?
Stanley: Nothing you can prove.
Stanley: Let's play the 20 questions.
Jacob: Fine, what is your favorite color?
Stanley: Triangle, do you like boys?
Stanley Barber: Do you want to know your gay name?
Jacob Thrombey: My gay name?
Stanley Barber: Yes, it is your first name.
Jacob Thrombey: Very funny.
Stanley Barber: *Crouched on his knee* And my last name.
Jacob Thrombey: Oh God...
Stan Uris: I'm cold.
Bill: Oh, take my sweater *Put his coat on Stan*
Stan Uris: Thanks *Hugs Bill*
Stanley Barber: Hmmm... I'm cold too.
Jacob Thrombey: *Without stopping to see his cell phone* And what does it matter to me?
Stanley Barber: Fuck you.