Nothing that the Russians say or do on their television and social media can trigger and frustrate a Ukrainian more than the attitude of the Western world towards the Russians.
I read the morning news and see that Jared Leto on his show in Serbia happily told his Russian fans that he'll come to Russia and Ukraine when these "problems" are over. I go on tumblr and see people I follow reblogging a post about Discord being blocked in Russia, and instructions on how to use the VPN as if literally all Russians don't know it already. This post has over 2k notes! A post about atrocities that Russians willingly commit in Ukraine on a daily basis will get you 60-100 notes, 95% of which will be from other Ukrainians.
This is beyond triggering. How do you live in this Russian-loving world with Russian-induced PTSD?
This is not a "Ukrainian crisis", not "temporary difficulties", not just a "problem" that can go away without a trace. It's an invasion, a Russian war against Ukraine, genocide of Ukrainians. We are not crazy and overdramatic, we see the true face of Russia. The one you will never be able to see through your red square glasses.
TW: Negative Venting, anxiety, depression, road accident
I want to start using tumblr like I would have in high school because I never did so, but this is going to be a learning curve so bear with me.
I’m a 22 year old queer lesbian, I’ve moved back to hometown after graduating college, and I feel like a failure. (Wow Night in the Woods sounds so good here) I feel like I wasted my academic career trying to become something I can’t be and find community when all I was finding were distractions to deal with the political stress of the world. I feel like the community I have found I’ve pushed away and don’t view me as a part of their community or that I’ve overstepped when I should’ve just communicated. My best friend, probably my first true friend, is taking a break from talking with me and I’m afraid I’ve ruined that friendship for the sake of finding love when I don’t fully love myself. I crashed my car after having a panic attack after being sleep deprived because I was trying to see my partner late at night after failing yet another interview. I feel powerless to fight the powers that be while also having to live as a consumer. I feel like the leftist spaces I do find have people who want to be perceived as the *best activist* that they cancel anyone who makes mistakes and ignore actually creating community for the sake of being politically correct. There’s nothing wrong with calling people out when they are being harmful on purpose, but I understand it’s difficult to recognize when people are being human and making mistakes or are just being assholes on purpose. Politics and amplified mental illness do not go hand in hand in terms of communication. When everyone is used to people being cruel it’s hard to trust that people can be kind. I’ve seen this happen so many times in leftist spaces now, through my dating life, friendships, and it’s frustrating.
I feel like it is impossible for people to connect when our communities disappeared during the pandemic.
I have typically liked writing in a journal, but i feel like tumblr can be a safe place for someone to blog and vent if need be.
I know it can be harmful in certain circumstances, but I am tired of not trusting people anymore and it all started with social media so I am going to try to fix that by being as authentic as possible. whether anyone reads or not is up to the algorithm.
All it comes down to is this: I am a burnt out queer neurodivergent human being who is afraid of being perceived who has developed major trust issues. I’m afraid of being perceived/judged by lovely humans who love me and have shown me love. Because I have been treated unfairly by people in the past. It doesn’t matter if I mask or not, people are always going to project their facts and feelings onto me, and I need to get used to it. So here goes nothing.
💞✨
I was bored, I created this, and away we go.