*Deidara, Itachi and Hidan building a “fort” out of tables, chairs, blankets and pillows*
Konan: What in the world are you three doing?
Deidara: We decided to make a club, hm. These are our headquarters.
Konan: A club? For what?
Hidan: It’s the Older Man Fucker club, pretty lady. All of us are doin’ it with the old guys.
Itachi: Kisame is not that old. Nor is Sasori-san.
Deidara: Hey, still older than us, hm. Not all of us can be with someone Kakuzu’s age!
Hidan: Hey, the bastard may be old as shit but he’s still got it where it counts, asshole. Oi, wait a sec, Konan! YOU should be in our club too!
Konan: Me?
Itachi: Mm. You’re dating Nagato, correct?
Konan: Yes, but —
Hidan: Well you’re only like 20, and —
Konan: I’m 32, actually.
All three: *thunderstruck silence*
Itachi: Really?
Hidan: Shit you’re gorgeous!
Deidara: What skin care products do you use, hm?
Hidan: Okay but still, you’re dating Nagato. That’s still a pretty big difference; that fucker’s gotta be 60 at least, and —
Konan: Actually Nagato and I are about the same age.
All three:
Hidan: … what the fuck?
Deidara: What skin care products does HE use, hm, so I know never to use them?
Itachi, gently: Do you need me to break whatever gengetsu he has you under?
Konan:
Nagato, in his room tweaking a Pain-body: *twitches*