Play Play Play

soooo out of practice with my wacom but i want to use it more >_< so i doodled an evangeline

she said she was microceleb but when i met her she was fucking normal sized. taller than me even. i brought a cute little bug carrier and everything and now i look like an asshole sitting here with it in my lap in this stupid fucking bar. sick of people lying about who they are online.

I unironically really enjoy the opera-rap + tuba sections.

Okay so it’s finals season which means I’ve cracked and need to go on my ramble about one of my favorite pieces of music of all time: The Most Unwanted Song.

The thing about this song isn’t that it’s bad. It’s a special kind of horrific. It’s so bad it crosses the invisible artistic barrier and becomes brilliant. And it was designed for that. 

See back in the 1990s these two artists decided to make a series of paintings (I promise it’s connected). Graphic designers  Vitaly Komar and Alexander Melamid sat down to create the “best” and “worst” paintings based on opinion polls. There’s commentary about public opinion in there, but that’s not the point right now. The point is, they were approached by a gallery owner and asked to make a CD using the same principle. 

So they started polling people. Turns out, the American public, when asked about what they hate in music, has a lot of answers. Winning answers included bagpipes, opera, rap, intellectually stimulating music (hah!), cowboy music, swearing in music, long songs, songs about America, children’s choirs, advertising jingles, and accordions. 

And then they set out to put all those things into one song with the help of Dave Soldier. 

And boy did they succeed. 

In order to make this song work, they couldn’t just have all the individual elements working separately. There wasn’t time for that, and they would have lost a lot of unity. So they went the inventive direction. So that’s why we have a opera-rap soprano singing lyrics with casual profanity about being a cowboy and philosophical discussions. That’s how we get this: 

It’s 22 minutes long. 22 minutes to consider your place in the universe. 

People also hate politics in songs, so at the end someone screams a protest rant through a bullhorn. At one point it sounds like someone is throwing up in the background. 

The best part of this, of course is that it was done by professional musicians. It’s pretty clear that they know what they’re doing and are choosing to do it really really badly. It adds to that flavor of chaos. 

I genuinely believe that everyone should listen to this song at least once. If nothing else, it will be funny. 

had a my little pony related dream while the show was playing in the room in real life and injecting lines into my dream so i would occasionally see a random character like princess luna go "THIS NOT PERFECT, YAK SMASH!!"

I feel this but from the receiving end. I like to be Things.

if i didnt stim by kneading things with my toes where would i be in life

this one liberal dude on twitter made the (correct) take that parents have overwhelming power over their kids and very often abuse it and restrict children's rights and he was ratio'd by conservatives, communists and liberals alike who made comments like "my kids will have rights when they pay the bills" to "aw are you upset mom and dad didn't you get you a lega set for christmas". way to prove his point lol! any criticism of the power dynamics adults and particularly parents have over kids and how it is often used to abuse kids or refuse to let them exist as themselves is drowned in mockery and the idea that parents have absolute authority over children and that any less than that is actually spoiling them.

i said it before: people only care about Children as an ideal. as property. as something that is Innocent and deserving protection From Evil Traffickers but also something Dumb that barely deserves the status of human with autonomy. and its fucking wild how even the staunchest communists think of this as normal, and how people refuse to understand that this dynamic is how kids are emotionally, physically and sexually abused, as well as robbed of their voices and too scared/ashamed to talk about it.

More favourite numerical memes:

Implicit or implicit enumeration of uncountable things (example: taking inventory of the fucks which one gives)

Suggesting the divisibility of things which are not customarily thought of as able to be subdivided (example: "six whole people")

Using words that aren't numbers as numbers (example: "one William dollars")

Technically correct but contextually misleading estimates (example: looking at a group of several thousand things and observing that there are "at least three")

Incongruous qualifiers for apparently simple sums or tallies (example: she was twenty-seven years old, not counting 2014)