What I Do To Prep For A Date

~summer bucket list~

🌷 Hi my lovess, here is my digital 2024 summer bucket list. These are all things that I want to try out this summer to make the most of it! I will continuously add more if I think of more ideas. <3

🦢Drive with loud music and windows down

🦢Go to the fair

🦢Ride a ferris wheel

🦢Try pottery

🦢Go to a water park

🦢Go on a early morning hike to go see the sunrise

🦢Go to the beach

🦢Beach camping

🦢Go fishing and cook what you catch

🦢Eat at fresh restaurants

🦢Walk around the city and shop/window shop

🦢Watch the sunset

🦢Watch firework shows

🦢Go ziplining

🦢Go to a creek

🦢Plant flowers/fruits/vegetables

🦢Have a picnic with family

🦢Self dates

🦢Daily runs

🦢Follow a Bob Ross routine

🦢Make bracelets

🦢Go to a concert/music event

🦢Try new recipes

🦢Go to six flags

🦢Rent a bike to ride around

🦢Polaroid/digital camera photo shoots

🦢Manicures/Pedicures

🦢Try out new makeup styles

🦢Try out new hair styles

🦢Game nights with family

🦢Make lots of bingsu

🦢Staying at the mall until it closes

🦢Going to the zoo

🦢Karaoke nights

🦢Back to school shopping

🦢Make a time capsule

🦢Write letters to my future self

🦢Take summer classes

🦢Take pilate/yoga classes

🦢Try out tennis or other sports

🦢Get a new piercing

🦢Take a color analysis

eyes without a face

Little things that improved my life 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Accepting my sleep schedule. I'm a night owl; I focus at night, I'm calm at night, I'm motivated at night. For a long time, I tried to fight this since everyone always preaches getting up early, but since I started accepting my natural sleep schedule, I've been feeling a lot better and have become way more productive.

"drink more water". TEA. Tea is the secret here. I will be honest, I hate drinking water; it doesn't matter if I have a cute water bottle or a cute glass, I still hate it. TEA.

Replying quickly. I used to be one of those people who get a text message and think, "Oh, I'll reply to that later", and then just forget about it entirely. Now, I text back as soon as I see the message. This has not only improved my texting anxiety (which I cause on my own by now replying and then feeling bad) but also deepened my connection to my friends. <3

Keeping my circle small and being okay with that. Over the past months, I've had this sudden urge to expand my social circle and get to know more and more people, especially after I moved in August. However, this quickly ended in what I like to call my "social burnout". I was tired, annoyed, and overwhelmed. It took a few weeks for it to settle, but I've come to the conclusion that I would much rather have a smaller circle of people who I trust and love deeply than a huge group of friends, and that's totally okay.

Wearing what I like. Even though I live in a big city, I'd still say that my style can sometimes be a bit more extravagant than what most people wear, another point is that I'm very uncomfortable with pants so I only wear skirts, which is also considered a bit odd where I live. But over the past years, I've come to accept that and have become so sure of myself and found such comfort in my style that I now just wear whatever I like, and it makes every day a little bit nicer.

Reading and writing for pleasure. Reading books outside of my studies and spending time researching topics that simply interest me is such a great way to calm your mind. Same for writing, I always like to say that to write is to think; putting your thoughts on paper in cohesive and well-crafted sentences that you can then reread and think over again is such a liberating thing to do.

Reaching out more. fuck the whole "double texting" and "no contact" thing. If you want to speak to someone because they mean something to you, then just do it. Unless they specifically asked for space, you shouldn't feel bad about wanting to be in touch with them. Many even really appreciate it when you show that you truly care. Let's stop the nonchalant act, and instead, let's face deep emotions and true vulnerability. <3

As always, please feel free to share your own little insights and things that helped you improve comments! <3

my insta: @ malusokay

love ya ･:*₊‧✩

𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧, 𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞 ⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

💗 A Healthy Relationship Should:

Boost your confidence

Encourage you to achieve your goals

Elevate your happiness

Bring you peace

Provide stability & security

Cultivate experiences

Nurture emotional and physical intimacy

Inspire you to take care of yourself

Enhance your life

💗 A Healthy Relationship Should Not:

Undermine your self esteem

Hinder your independence

Limit your growth

Create stress

Promote jealousy

Neglect your needs

Isolate you

Manipulate or guilt you

Be overly dependent

Ignore boundaries

tips on how to get out of a reading slump?

Tips on how to get out of a reading slump 📖

Start small. Look for a short stories book that fits your preferred genres, or for a really short novel (under 200 pages). Something that you'd be able to read in one sitting, if you really get into it, or two days of leisurely reading. Short stories are better for this, in my opinion, because you'll get more punch for your buck. Poetry is also a good option for this, if poetry is your thing.

Switch it up completely. Maybe your slump means that you're tired of reading the same genres with similar plotlines. Try reading something that is completely new, completely different from what you usually read. Different genres, or something by an author from a very foreign country to you, or a different demographic... Just run to the opposite direction.

Get off the mainstream. If you get your book recs from social media, it's very likely that you'll end up reading pretty much the same book over and over, because book bloggers and vloggers usually talk about what will get more engagement, and these are mainstream reads. Try getting out of these environments and look for books that are "off the scene", books that aren't necessarily the most popular ones but that look interesting.

Don't read the book before you read the book. There's a big trend nowadays of people who read books seeking particular tropes, pairings and plotlines, which means they have to know what the book is about before even starting it. If you also do that, try stopping it and instead just pick up books with as little previous knowledge as possible. You can even judge a book by its cover! Let the book surprise you instead of trying to like it before you read it. On that note...

If it's not fun, drop it. It's completely fine to drop a book if you're not enjoying it, and you don't have to force yourself to finish everything you started! It doesn't matter if everyone else on your feed loved that book and is talking about it non-stop: if it doesn't captivate you, let it go and grab another one. Trying to force yourself to finish uninteresting books is a sure recipe for slumping.

Stop the bookblring for a while. If you're active on social media writing reviews and blogging about literature, you may want to give that a pause if you're in a slump. You may be looking at reading more as a chore or a job than an enjoyable activity of leisure and fun, trying to read what you think your followers will enjoy or what will get the most views and clicks instead of what you will enjoy reading. Try reading more for yourself, privately, if you think this may be the case.

Read a classic. If you're the type who reads more contemporary books, try going back in time towards the literature that set the foundation for what gets written nowadays. This may help rekindle your interest because you'll feel connected to something so much larger than life; people who have been dead for centuries felt like you felt, enjoyed what you enjoyed, laughed and cried along with you through the streams of time and space.

Try writing. If you don't write already, give it a shot. Perhaps what you're really looking for is a story that is within you rather than in the pages available to you. Don't do it with the intent of publishing it or even showing it to anyone else: write for yourself, write something you'd enjoy reading, and do read it!

That's all I have for now, but feel free to add more tips on the replies, as well as book recommendations if you have any. I hope these are helpful to you ♥️

The Glow-Up Is a Lifestyle: 10 Ways to Elevate Your Everyday

by Soleau Club

If you're still thinking of a glow-up as a one-time thing, let's shift that energy. The glow-up is a lifestyle, not a crash course. It's how you pour your water, speak to yourself, and curate your entire damn aura. Here's how I subtly (but dramatically) elevate my everyday to keep it soft, hot, and high-vibe.

I start romanticizing boring moments

Folding laundry becomes a reset ritual when Sade is playing and there’s lavender mist in the air. I’m not "cleaning the kitchen" — I’m clearing space for my next manifestation.

I treat my body like it’s my best friend, not a project

I’m not punishing her with workouts or starving her. I move her with joy. I feed her with care. I rest her with luxury. She’s my ride-or-die, so I act like it.

I say no without guilt

Overbooked = overwhelmed = out of alignment. I’ve started turning things down that don’t feel like a full-body yes. If it doesn’t light me up or calm me down, it’s a no.

I drink my water like I’m getting paid for it

Hydration is a personality trait. I have one bottle for bed, one for my car, one that looks cute in Instagram pics — and I rotate through them like they're part of my identity.

I curate my surroundings like they’re part of my nervous system

Everything around me either adds to my peace or disrupts it. I choose candles, playlists, lighting, textures, and colors that feel like me. That is self-respect.

I move slowly on purpose

Walking slower. Eating slower. Answering slower. When I stopped rushing, I started glowing. Slow = sensual = regulated = powerful.

I take social media breaks before I get bitter

If I’m doom scrolling and comparing, I log out. If my vibe is off, I don’t keep feeding it content. I detox like I detox sugar — regularly and unapologetically.

I spend money like it’s energy

If it’s not aligned, calming, inspiring, or luxurious in some way… I’m not buying it. Wealth starts with how you invest your attention, your time, and yes — your dollars.

I prioritize joy over aesthetics

Some days the vibe isn’t a green smoothie in a silk robe — it’s eating popcorn in mismatched pajamas while watching early 2000s rom-coms. That counts. That heals.

I act like my dream life already exists (because it does)

I’m not waiting to “glow up.” I’m embodying it. I wear the perfume now. I eat the nourishing food now. I take care of myself now. And suddenly, I’m already her.

Follow @soleauclub for more soft glam wellness, ritual-coded glow-ups, and hot girl elevation that lasts all year.

SELF VALIDATION

First things first, if you validate your existence on externalities, you will never truly be happy. While it’s important to have values and to act on them, it shouldn’t be your main source of happiness. 

E.g. parent validation, academic validation, and male validation. So, here are some tips to validate yourself. 

VALUE YOUR OPINION. You should have the ability to make decisions and identify yourself solely on your opinion. Trust, giving people that ability to shape your decisions and curate your identity, allows them to dictate your worth. 

SELF LOVE OVER OTHERS. Ensure you are doing everything in your power to treat yourself lovingly. Even if it means sacrificing a few things in life. E.g. going to sleep early instead of cramming for a test. 

BE RESILIENT. When I say that, I don’t mean ‘don't let anything affect you’ but rather, build yourself up to the point that when someone/something knocks you down, you can bounce back easily. 

BECOME SELF AWARE. Know your strengths, and weaknesses, and be mindful of the truth. Be genuine when it comes to this because self-awareness helps us with becoming more in touch with our inner selves.

AVOID NEGATIVE SELF TALK. This can cause us to rely on others to hear good things about ourselves. Instead, say affirmations in the mirror.

STOP PEOPLE PLEASING. There’s a difference between genuinely being nice, and being a doormat. You shouldn’t have to bend over backwards for others, and they give absolutely nothing back. Invest that time and effort into yourself.

SOMEONE’S GAIN IS NOT YOUR LOSS. This is a mindset shift that will change the game. You have to stop seeing successful, wealthy, pretty or intelligent people as threatening your skills or talents. There is enough success for everyone.

DETACH FROM OTHERS. Friends, family, males, etc. Stop letting how other people treat you, dictate your mood for the rest of the day. The only factor your mood should depend on is you. What you do, say, and act is the only factor. 

KNOCK OTHERS FROM YOUR PEDESTAL. The only person that should be on top of your pedestal, is you. By doing this, you create an inferiority complex for someone else and give them superiority. 

OTHER’S OPINIONS ARE MOMENTARY. They will always move on with their day and see what needs to be done. They do not care about you as much as you think. So, do not even try to give them the time of day. 

BUILD BOUNDARIES. With others and yourself. Both are equally important because you value yourself enough not to do something you’ll regret.