Latest Posts by pistachiophobia - Page 8
I have just realized that Isa and Jake are the highlight of my life. I’m writing a book about them and now I can’t stop laughing.
Isa, about Jake: I have never been so repulsed by someone mentally and so attracted to them physically at the same time.
Isa, pulling back the shower curtain:Hey, what do you want for breakfast? Jake: Privacy?
Jake: Awee, Isa look at you, getting all romantic with these candles. Isa: Isa: Ok first of all, I'm going to sacrifice you-
official description!!
i finally posted this!!! (my body procrastinated during these last few months <3)
coffee-drunk friends: the description
she noticed her feelings and couldn't look at him the same way again.
isa ahn has bargain standards when it comes to everything. get into a college without roommates, have a decent job, and be financially stable with 5 dogs by 28. her go-getter, busy-boy best friend however, has other plans. after all, he’s the golden boy, the favored boy, the popular boy who’s really good at soccer. the sunshine you need on a rainy day. though after setting her principal’s house on fire, isa, along with jake, tackle the mysteries of 1950’s old school radio shows and why true love is the best kind of love out there.
Isa: What are amphetamines?
Jake: Drugs that can go on land and water.
Isa: Ohhhh.
Isa: You're alive.
Jake: There's no need to sound so disappointed.
Isa: Do you know a turtles only weakness?
Jake: No... well, their slowness.
Isa: Their weaknesss is they can't roll over when they are on their backs.
Isa: Now I have a plan.
Isa: If I duct tape two turtles together, they'll be unstoppable.
Isa: Can I ask a dumb question?
Jake: Better than anyone I know.
Jake: Where are you going?
Isa: Hell, eventually.
Isa: Jake... you've been cuddling with me for over and hour now.
Jake: *muffled* mm hmmm :)
Isa: Fuck. I should be annoyed but you're adorable.
Isa, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.
Court: about to have Isa hanged over attempted murder.
Jake, bursting into jail: You don’t have all the facts!
The judge: Which are?
Jake: I love her.
Jake: I drink to forget but I always remember.
Isa: You're drinking orange juice.
Isa: *Gasp*
Jake: wHAT??
Isa: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?
Jake: *inhales*
Kai, in another room: Why can I hear screeching?
i pray to god I won’t mess up shit again
*in a haunted house*
Isa: Remember when I told you not to be afraid, Jake?
Jake: YES, tell me wHY!?
Isa: That was then, now is the time to be afraid!
I just wanna write a slow dance scene 😭
(reasons why im still single)
Isa: Jake... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?
Jake: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.
Isa:
Isa: I wrote sanitize, Jake.
Jake: What is the definition of love?
Isa: Love is a good deal. Bargain shopping for ice cream.
Jake:
Isa: Or escaping from communist China. Either way works fine.
hiii, I wanted to say your layout looks so so pretty!! <3
thank you so much! I’m new to Tumblr so I wasn’t sure if I was getting this whole thing down.
Isa: Don’t worry, you have to treat an electronic like you treat a patient on life support.
*unplugs the TV, then plugs it back in again. nothing changes*
Isa: Yeah, that didn’t work with Jake either.
barely anyone wants to read my shit. i’ll just keep posting till people actually like my stuff. just sayin.
Isa: I am strong! I beat Kai at arm wrestling!
Jake: Anyone can beat Kai at arm wrestling!
Kai: Hey-
Isa: *sees someone doing something stupid*
Isa: What an idiot.
Isa: *realizes it's Jake*
Isa: Wait, that's MY idiot!
[4:42 PM]
stars glimmered like ice in a sea of darkness, flickering silver and gold as a comet shot across the sky, illuminating the sky for a moment. the streets were filled with empty cars and parking lots, the last bus departing to brooklyn.
all the pay phones were empty, save the one you were leaning on inside. one by one, all the lights switched off, except the one right above you.
it took you a few seconds to realize you were the only one outside. even pigeons, who flew by or stuck around on power lines, didn’t even come tonight. you rummage in your pocket, looking for any spare coins you still had left.
lucky for you, fifty cents was all you needed. you insert the coins into the machine, pressing several buttons till you pressed a red button. it rung for a few seconds until…
“hello?” you hear a voice on the other side, “who is this?”
“it’s me.”
there was a long pause, and you feel like you’ve made a mistake. you didn’t even think he would answer, but you were glad he did. you heard light breathing and you were sure he was in bed, under the covers.
“why are you calling me?”
“i just wanted to know if you’re doing fine.” you respond, “it’s been quite a while since we’ve talked.”
silence. if you dropped a pin outside, you could hear it from the pay phone.
“i hope you’ve made it to harvard, i know you’ve been working so hard to study there. harvard really is a great place.”
“yeah, i did. i have to go now.”
“wait, please!” you choked back on your sobs, “just..hear me out! please!”
“y/n, you’ve crumbled what was left of our relationship. i know you want to mend this relationship, but you can’t. it may have been possible a few months ago, but not now.”
“please, give me a chance.” you whispered, tears cascading down your rosy cheekbones. “i promise you, we can do whatever you want. whatever you need to fix this, i’ll do it. just please come back.”
“i’m so sorry, y/n, but i can’t, not like this. we can still be friends, but we can’t have the same relationship as before. goodbye.”
“no.” you choked. this couldn’t be the end. it can’t be the end. you felt shock and chill in your bones as goosebumps appeared on your skin and hot tears flooding down your bloodshot eyes. your body was shaking as you felt your limbs growing weak.
you couldn’t accept that he was gone. that he was never coming back. you missed his hazel brown eyes and his honey skin and the way he’d call for you at 4 AM. because he was like that. because you broke something that can’t be fixed. your eyes are droopy and you can’t take it anymore.
you end up falling asleep in the pay phone, your hair all over your face. before you know it, the sun rises across the horizon, painting the sky a lovely golden hue, like a renaissance painting.
you hear a quiet ding from your phone. you thought s/o would have deleted your number, so you ended up deleting his two days ago. you never expected he’d reply.
but it wasn’t the reply you wanted. you were his past to a brighter future. you’re stuck living in your past while s/o makes his own future. he thinks of you, and wished you the best of luck.
this is s/o, i just want you to know that i’m deleting your number. i know it’s sudden, but until we can be friends, i’d rather restart as strangers than try to fix something that’s already broken.
A Picnic Under the Stars
are we a happy ending or a tragedy?
Stars shone as sugar split over black marble, glistening what was left of the sun as twilight captured the majestic sky, turning into a brilliant blend of purple and orange. The once bustling city of Manhattan became deserted at night. All the gates shut, and the tiny, beige townhouses were lit inside. Families danced around the table, singing nursery rhymes you could hear from miles away.
She loved Manhattan, she told herself. She loved it because it was the home she never thought she needed. Sure, it was bustling and hustling during the day, but at night, it was beautiful. She didn’t like Manhattan at first, mainly because of the busyness vibe it gives off. At night, everything was possible.
She ran as fast as her two feet can carry her, her chestnut hair falling behind her, dancing in the cold, frosty air. Jumping over a black, rusted gate, she started to climb a wall covered with thick thorns, decorated with red and pink roses. To her surprise, she wasn’t alone.
Both of them were equally startled. “What the hell? Who are you?” She said, troubled.
“What do you mean, who am I? Who are you?” He gasped with a feeble voice.
“I come here to see the stars at night.” She responds. “You?”
“Same here. It gets boring during the day.”
She sits down next to him, getting a good glimpse of his jet-black hair, his sharp jawline, the way his honey skin glows in the dark, his eyes reflecting the moonlight. They sit there for a good while, casually admiring the stars.
“Do you wanna…have a picnic?” She breaks the silence. He falls silent for a moment, and for a moment, she think she’s made a mistake.
“Never mind, it was a stu-”
“Let’s do it.”
She sat there, mouth agape as he took a small blanket from his white tote bag full of college books and tons of snacks he tossed onto the blanket. She snorted as he handed her a Twix bar and some marshmallows. For a moment, she felt butterflies in her stomach, her cheeks deepening to a light shade of rosy pink.
“There.” He points to a constellation. “That’s Libra, and over there. That’s Cancer.”
“I don’t know much about astrology.”
“You don’t need to.” He assured her. “In the sky, you can see their stories.”
“Wow.” She sighed in awe. Those constellations were breathtaking. She’ll admit it, she’s not very good at spotting constellations, but she can find stars. Isn’t that enough?
For the first time, she found someone who understands what it feels like to be confined. To have limited freedom and control, to erase personalities not desired. She isn’t alone anymore.
“Do you .....wanna hang out sometime?” He asked, a little flustered.
“Sure, I’d like that.”
Jake: Are you ever going to listen to me?
Isa: Yes. Absolutely.
Jake: When?
Isa: When you're right.
Jake: The first time I ever got upset in front of Isa, she put her arms around me and it was so awkward that I had to ask her if she was hugging me or reaching for something on the shelf behind me.
Isa: I was doing both, for your information.
Kai: The first time Isa hugged me, it was such a disaster we didn’t make eye contact for, like, a week after.
Jake: Any advice before Kai and I fight?
Isa: Don’t wet yourself in public.
Jake: Not the kind of advice I was looking for.