I Only Need $190

you contain multitudes i contain multi dudes *5 guys emerge from my mouth and make you a really overpriced cheeseburger*

The relationship between a girl and the random shit on her bedside table

Imagine you’re Dracula, enjoying drinking this tasty girl until finally one night you’re like well it’s been fun but she’s pretty much drained I guess it’s time to find another victim and then they just start… filling her back up? I bet he was like holy shit modern medicine is great, what a time to be undead

“unhand me” is so good. and always appropriate to say. like literally unhand me

bloodlust is the best word in the english language. she has everything. sex. violence. assonance. who can compare.

my favorite customer service slip ups

Early morning are so beautiful it's so mean that they put them in the early morning

have we tried substance abuse my liege

Emil Melmoth

finished painting studies w/ the og dregs….