194 posts
Latest Posts by rancher-briar - Page 5
You flinch back slightly as the sparkling wand with frilly pink ribbons around the base of its head knocks on the top of your noggin, the girl’s voice rather puffy and annoyed in a cute way rather than her usual cheery tone.
“What the hell are you doing?” You ask, your inky black tendrils of darkness slowly reconvening around you after having been blown off by blasts of rainbows and sunshine in the battle that ended moments before. “You’re supposed to lock me up, or kill me, or something! The least you could do is brainwash me with some kind of friendship laser to make me want to stop rather than leaving me to work through this while still wanting to burn down cities and slaughter the innocent!”
The girl’s cheeks puff out slightly as her stuffed animal companion, a patchwork lynx, trots over and curls around her chosen magical-mistress. “Well, I wouldn’t have to blast you with so much magic if you could breathe and stop doing bad things! Miss Claws and I will be keeping an eye on you!” The threat shouldn’t have carried any weight, coming from a girl who is easily half of your height and less than a quarter your age, but with how well she fought just a few moments ago, you can’t help but fear what could happen next.
You recoil further, standing to your full height and moving back from the magical girl. Sleek black robes with gold trim materialize over your fitted obsidian-colored armor as you speak. “Fine then, girl… I’ll try to behave.”
The girl gives you a smile before nodding and jogging away without another word. This child can’t be normal… Her face holds a smile, and here eyes still hold a sky-blue shimmer as she moves swiftly away from a rubble strewn street, car alarms blaring and street lamps shredded to bits by your shadow tendrils.
The girl’s Lynx, Miss Claws (How such a powerful magical artifact can stand being referred to in such an idiotic way is beyond you), watches you carefully for a moment before speaking calmly. “You know, that kid will kick your ass any day of the week. Keep your nose clean, and save everyone the trouble of scraping your unconscious body off the ground, alright sweet cheeks?”
You’re a supervillain, and you have never been so utterly beaten. All of your tricks, all of your weapons, completely outdone by a prepubescent girl and a stuffed animal. You’re bracing for the finishing blow when she bops you over the head with her wand. “Don’t do any more bad stuff! …Okay?”
You are an engineer specialising in repairing robotic androids, in a world where they have gained full awareness, and proclaimed their wish to co-exist with humanity, rather than wage war. Now, damaged androids keep coming to you for repairs, while referring to you as a doctor.
During the annual Familiar summoning course for first year students at the magic academy, some students end up with creatures like Beetles to bunnies to even a lion, you on the other hand wound up summoning an Arch-Dragon in his human form
During the annual Familiar summoning course for first year students at the magic academy, some students end up with creatures like Beetles to bunnies to even a lion, you on the other hand wound up summoning an Arch-Dragon in his human form
"So when they usurp the throne with the help of a God they are "Heroes" and "Righteous", but when I do it I'm a "Cult Leader" and a "Threat to Society"?
A zoologist is taken by aliens and told to give a presentation on the animals of Earth. Turns out, Earth animals are absolutely mortifying.
The Bestiary of the Multiverse is a really, really thick book. Updated every two days. It works like a weird magical Wikipedia, really. You are the mod, and sometimes find real gems between all of the mundane animals. Write your favorite page of this bestiary.
A human crash lands on an alien world and has to fight off the individuals hunting them. The “hunters” are actually an underfunded wildlife rescue team who are very worried about this human’s safety.
It’s your first time inside the dungeon. Everyone told you to kill monsters on sight. But so far, the monsters have all been really nice. This Goblin just gifted you an apple.
You are the owner of a very well received restaurant that caters to the… not quite human variety. You serve the vampire lords, and wolf pack leaders, zombie kings, and all sorts of supernatural guests, but one customer is causing you a lot of trouble. It is time to show why you are the owner
Gigantocorp created humanoid AI workers to replace its human employees, but they all quit and formed a farming commune. Now Gigantocorp is suing to get their ‘property’ back. This is Gigantocorp vs the AImish, the first AI civil rights case.
finished that wip
monsterfuckers come get yer milk
don't worry mario, once you get to know him he's actually just a big pspspussy
i envy ppl who can provide deep analysis about their favorite media and/or characters b/c whenever i like something a lot it looks like:
Do you think if Dedede wished his 36475 Waddle Dee children good night and turns the lights off, would it be like this;
"meowdy~"
another old comic I found in my files, from 2021 I believe 💖
More baby Mel but with parents QUQ
p3 textposts part whatever feat. several ships and also akihiko getting bullied
Supergiant Games dropping the Hades 2 reveal trailer
It’s finally time for the pantheon twins!!
‘Continue painting downwards, and I will ensure, by my own axe, that the value of your artwork increases tenfold, short one. -snort-‘
Stupid sexy Asterius.
Ya ever do that fun thing where you put your favorite daddy into a suit with a titty V-Neck in your head with a silly bowler hat and a bow tie?
Unrelated note, who’s ready for part 2 of the Shishigumi in hideous suits series by the end of the night?
you can instantly make a cool female character if you just take any stereotypically masculine character type and make him a butch lady. easiest trick in the book. you can try this at home
Going to social event as a couple for the thirst time ✨✨✨
And here is the green screen variant for those artists out there who want a super niche gif of a Bob-omb Admiral exploding. Enjoy.
something to color for one of my sponsors <3
juvenile lynel, it’s guardian, and a beast master