I Think Cumplane Is The Only Ship Name I Use And See Used Indiscriminately Platonically And Romantically/sexually.

puppy play but halfway thru i suddenly start barking and run off into the woods faster than u can keep up with. u quickly lose sight of me. u call out my name and whistle to no response. u walk slowly in hopes of hearing where i may be but its dead quite. my barking stopped some distance away. it was getting dark when i ran off but now its pitch black. against ur better judgment u leave in hopes that ill come back of my own accord. 3 days later uve given up hope. ur printing out lost dog posters when u hear scratching at the door. u open it to see me. u lunge forward and hug me so excited i came back. immediately upon being back u feel like somethings off. i look and sound just like me. but i walk around the house like i hadnt been there. i refuse to eat anything even treats. and when u look at me u get the sinking feeling these are different eyes staring back at u. almost as if theyre seeing more than usual. u initially write it off as just being due to stress of being in the woods alone for a few days. but one day in the middle of the night u hear a scratching. u think its me but im asleep on the floor by ur bed. u walk out into the hallway. u follow the noise to the front door. under the sound of scratching is whining. my whining. u swing open the door to a barrage of licks and headbutts. the joy u get from seeing me immediately sinks into a gutteral fear as u realize the dog that came back. the dog uve spent a week sleeping next to. was not me. but some kind of imitation. i start snarling. then whimpering. u dont need to turn around to know what was standing behind u. u pick me up and run as fast as u can. stomping footsteps way too close behind u. and then. nothing. u turn around just in time to see the thing that was once imitating ur dog lurch into the woods. it lets out one final bark in my voice. then disappears into the trees. and then we like. have sex or something

Teenage Liu Qingge time travels to the future. Let’s say The Abyss Years (TM), as any good LiuShen story does. And who does he meet there, SQQ, of course.

Of course, this is SY, and not SJ, but LQG doesn’t know that! He’s amazed at how nice he’s being to him! And SY is just enjoying having a cute baby version of LQG around. SY smiles at him and he gets all red! He’ll never get a girlfriend like that, SY thinks to himself.

LQG goes back to his time with one very important thought- that SJ can be that nice to spend time with if LQG only was able to befriend him! Somehow! Did I say this was LiuShen? I’m sorry, this is LiuJiu!

Meanwhile, while teenaged LQG was hanging around SY, adult LQG was hanging around teenaged SJ, who does not want to have to entertain the peak lord from the future. Unfortunately, social niceties (and his Shizun) are forcing his hand, so here he is, spending the day with him.

And the adult version of LQG is being so nice to him?? Taking his bitchy comments, bringing up monsters for him to lecture about. He never really cared about monsters like that, but it was kinda nice to have someone actually listen to him for once.

So when teenaged LQG gets back, him and SJ just look at each other and think, “Why can’t you be like the other one?”

Man’s then something something, character development, LQG falling in love with SJ and his character traits and not just the ones he saw in SY, blah blah blah. I like time travel and I like stories that force these two to get along for five minutes lol

Also. Adult LQG, after spending a day with teenaged SJ, spends five minutes with SY and in entirety convinced that this is a new person. Clocks it immediately now that he has a fresh reference. Not that he cares or anything! This version of LQG is in love with SY, not SJ after all.

But he does wish that the other man would confide in him. He spends the next few years trying to ‘subtly’ hint to SY that he already knows his big secret! Go ahead and tell him the truth!

SY spends those years freaking out over what LQG might know.

from bright-eyed and bushy-tailed to political fugitives on the run

I had the most hilarious thought!

A reverse transmigration AU, only it’s Bingge’s wives that keep popping into the modern world.

Shen Yuan is house sitting at his parents’ place while they’re on an extended trip. A few days in he discovers Ning Yingying wandering around the place, in her full Xianxia wife-of-the-emperor garbed glory!

She’s confused, Shen Yuan is confused, and they haven’t a clue how or why she’s there.

A display of spiritual powers manages to convince Shen Yuan she’s not just some insane cosplayer, so he does his best to be a polite host and accommodate his sudden guest. Surely Binghe will show up to ‘save’ her eventually so Shen Yuan wants to ingratiate himself, but in a polite, platonic way, so he doesn’t get himself killed as a kidnapper or for seducing Binghe’s wife.

Then the next day, Liu Mingyan shows up. A few days later, Sha Hualing is there. Then Qin Wanyue. Then the little Palace Mistress. Etc.

This is going to be a problem!

Is there some sort of dimensional leak in PIDW’s inner palace? Why do all of Binghe’s wives keep showing up??? How is Shen Yuan supposed to entertain all these people and keep them from wreaking havoc on the city and/or destroying his parents’ house? He’s just a regular guy!

Thank god his parents' staff are on vacation, and they have guest rooms to spare, but still. The food delivery services are giving him weird looks, and surely his parents will eventually review his credit card statements and notice all his sudden odd purchases of women’s clothing.

I’m not sure what all the modern interests of the wives would be, and where Shen Yuan would take them on outings, but he’s for sure a much better host then he realizes. He ends up encouraging them all to expand their horizons in ways they never would have while stuck in the harem with its expectations and politicking. (For two I have thought of: Liu Mingyan definitely finds meimei’s danmei stash in her old room at some point, and it would be hilarious if Sha Hualing was introduced to online PVP games and became the queen of epic gaming trash talk).

Bingge does show up eventually, and it turns out he had been trying to break into Shen Yuan’s world himself the whole time, only some type of misfire or portal issue kept nabbing the various wives instead.

Pretty much all the wives stuck in the modern world adore Shen Yuan by that point, so of course they’re all fine with Binghe bringing him back to join the harem. He’s great! Binghe had better treat him well though, or else.

I just think Shang Qinghua should get so angry one time that he unconsciously overrides the System and unlocks Admin privileges and just deletes entire clans out of existance in the blink of an eye while going "writing you in was a mistake".

And I also think everyone who saw that refuses to ever talk about it, but they're all scared shitless of the tiny human by Mobei-jun's side now because they realize he's not just really smart and an amazing strategist, he's also a god and can kill them all in 0.5 seconds. And now they all think that Shang Qinghua is actually the one running the show and Mobei-jun is just, like, the face of the Northern kingdom only.

Shang Qinghua is utterly horrified when he snaps out of it and realizes what he's done (somehow??? He doesn't know wtf just happened) and how now everyone is terrified of him except for Mobei-jun who is just looking at him with heart in his eyes lmao

AU where Shen Qingqiu (original flavour) has a qi deviation and (maybe because the System interferes and tries to transmigrate SY into his body but fails?) something goes really weird and he wakes up to his twelve year old self lying next to him.

Obviously, he can’t actually tell anyone that Shen Jiu is his younger self. He’s not exactly sure how it works and what would happen to him if SJ died, and he remembers what he was like at that age, and it would really damage his reputation if everyone else did too. So, SJ gets introduced as his nephew who has come to learn cultivation under him. Obvious nepotism? Sure, but might as well take advantage of those assumptions people have about him to hide the truth. Who’s going to question him, YQY?

So, SJ becomes a disciple while still being pretty confused as to how he got into a cultivation sect and where Qi-ge is. He gets into a fight with Ming Fan almost immediately, which naturally results in him recruiting LBH (currently 13/14) as his minion, since MF already took the rest. (LBH calls him shixiong even though he really should be shidi). They become pretty close quickly, although it’s still something of a transactional relationship with LBH telling him stuff about how the sect works and helping him work on his writing/reading, while in exchange, SJ fights of the bullies for him because he doesn’t have to worry about getting thrown out.

This changes after a while when SQQ notices how close they’re getting, and in an attempt to convince SJ to stop being friends with LBH, tells him what happened with Yue Qi (leaving out the fact that he’s YQY). This backfires by leading to their first proper bonding moment when LBH comforts him about it.

- meme time -

“This is my nephew. Please ignore him, he’s weird”

young!SJ: not sure if I actually have family or if this is a really weird kidnapping

SQQ: you’ve got to act like you’re a rich kid.

SJ: but that means I can’t bite people >:(

LBH: I can help shixiong learn to read 🥰

SJ after meeting LQG: bet you I can scam him

LBH: Shen-shixiong, no!

SJ: Shen-shixiong yes!

There are theories that SJ is SQQ and YQYs son and the reason their relationship is like it is is because YQY refused to raise him.

QHT: that’s him officer, that’s the one who murdered my family

The cultivator she’s speaking to: ma’am that’s a child

SQQ: just act normal and don’t embarrass me

SJ: ok starts gunning for future peak lord position

SQQ: wait not like that

"Your father was justified in his want for justice, but that doesn't excuse the thousands he's slaughtered in his quest to achieve it" - SY (cycle of hands)

[continuation]

There is a lot of potential in exploring Binghe's relationship with his children and the possible abuse he perpetuates. The SY of this universe was a fellow disciple of SQQ ~10 yrs prior who was heavily abused as well. SQQ was jealous of his loving family and the position of power that he was born into. Instead of staying, SY left the sect when he realized it was only causing him pain, after about 2-3 years of being there. He became a rogue cultivator until he hears about the burning of cang qiong and goes into hiding. I also speak the truth that a native sy (that wasn't on QJ at the same time as binghe) would Despise lbh with his whole being. LBH's kids escape the palace and run into SY who secretly teaches them swordplay and musical cultivation for self defense, teaching them the same way he wished sqq did for him. SY was able to break the cycle while binghe keeps it rolling even if he isn't aware of it. SY dresses up as a woman when he goes out bc he notices a pattern of lbh being more trusting of woman and turning the other cheek more. More than once they crossed paths and sy wanted to deck him in the face.

@perpetualgrey's comment on this post

Ok my first instinct was to laugh, but then I realised you might be onto something???

Shen Yuan is LITERALLY an impostor, who’s more far more kind and beloved by Binghe than the original. The Guanyin pendant is a counterfeit, but it carries the love of Binghe’s mother and is far more precious than any real jade could ever be.

The heartbreak Binghe’s mother felt after realising that the Guanyin pendant was fake and she’d been tricked was part of what lead to the gradual decline of her health.¹ In wanting to do something kind for Binghe, she felt that she’d failed, and this led to her demise. What is Shen Qingqiu’s entire story, but trying to be kind to Binghe, feeling inadequate at this, and dying? (More than once!!)

Guanyin is a Bodhisattva associated with mercy, kindness, compassion and unconditional love. She is a patron of mothers, and is called upon in times of fear, uncertainty, and despair. The Bodhisattva she originated from is seen as a saviour, through whose grace even those with the most negative karma can achieve salvation. Even when she is not worshipped as a goddess, she is revered as the principle of love, compassion and mercy.² From wikipedia, “The act, thought and feeling of compassion and love is viewed as Guanyin. A merciful, compassionate, loving individual is said to be Guanyin.”²

The original Luo Binghe appears never to have lost his pendant. Shen Qingqiu tells us: “It was the only bit of warmth in Luo Binghe’s dark world, always by his side, and even in the future when he was at his darkest, it could summon up his last dregs of humanity.”¹ He also states that “it was Luo Binghe’s biggest berserk button.”¹

Our Luo Binghe does not cling to the pendant when he’s at his darkest: he clings to the love he has for his shizun and to memories of his kindness, and later, to the lifeless body of Shen Qingqiu himself. His biggest berserk button isn’t when people insult the pendant or his mother, or try to take it away; it’s Shen Qingqiu: when people insult him or try to take him away.

From the start, Shen Qingqiu expresses truly unconditional love for Binghe. He spends three years showing endless compassion and kindness, actions which feel insignificant to him but are more than enough to completely change Binghe’s life. He holds no blame or resentment for the things he fears Binghe will do to him; though he doesn’t want to be tortured, he forgives Binghe for it nonetheless, before it has even happened. He sacrifices himself to save Binghe as his mind is eaten away at by Xin Mo, when he believes that Binghe just slaughtered a hundred Huan Hua Disciples, when Binghe’s reckless use of the sword is putting countless more lives at risk.³

Shen Qingqiu is a counterfeit that is more precious than the original could ever be. For Binghe, he personifies kindness, compassion and unconditional love. His regrets over his treatment of Binghe lead to his temporary demise. Binghe clings to him in his darkest moments, and he is that which Binghe protects most fiercely.

I always found the pendant’s role in the story to be almost lacking: it’s treated as such an important item to Binghe, yet in the end its return is almost anticlimactic. But perhaps this is because the role the pendant played in Bing-ge’s story has been overtaken by Shen Qingqiu. When he returns the pendant, Binghe is relieved and appreciative: but his joy seems to stem more from the fact that Shen Qingqiu held onto it and cherished him than from the pendant itself. The pendant doesn’t matter all that much to him anymore, at least not compared to how important it seems to have been in PIDW. Binghe doesn't need an object to symbolize love and kindness; he has a person to love, who loves him back.

In conclusion: Shizun was in fact the fake jade Guanyin pendant all along!

sources cited below :)

1. Seven Seas Volume 1, Chapter 1: Scum. Pages 40-41.

2. “Guanyin,” Wikipedia. There’s a lot more to her than what I mentioned here, she’s quite interesting.

3. Seven Seas Volume 2, Chapter 8: Death. Pages 154-156.

SVSSS "no Abyss" fluff AU where Shen Qingqiu just keeps accidentally proposing to a full grown disciple Luo Binghe in ways that don't register to him, but do register to Binghe, but Binghe also knows that his Shizun is clueless and doesn't actually mean it, so he's trapped in a hell of constantly getting what he desires most and fighting the urge to take advantage of the situation in order to actually claim it.

For instance, it turns out that PIDW has a knock-off version of Valentine's Day thanks to one really ill-planned VIP chapter. Shen Qingqiu found that one so egregious even he mostly scrubbed it from his mental records, but the long and short of it is that in the PIDW chocolate exists, but it's a symbolic treat that is only meant to be given to someone you intend to marry.

Of course, Shen Qingqiu discovers chocolate in PIDW and IMMEDIATELY hands it over to Luo Binghe, because he wants to see how Binghe's magnificent cooking skills can utilize this ingredient. Also he wants bon bons and this seems like the only way he's gonna get any in this lifetime.

Naturally, Binghe does make delicious bon bons, all the while fighting down the urge to be like "you proposed so we're getting married now, no take backs!"

Shizun eats the chocolates and Binghe counts slowly backwards from ten and reminds himself that getting what he wants by way of trickery would ultimately deny him what he wants most, which is for Shen Qingqiu to choose him of his own volition.

And of course, this shit just keeps happening. Somehow Shen Qingqiu keeps "forgetting" (read: subconsciously repressing) the little details about various proposal customs in PIDW (of which there are A LOT thanks to all the wife acquisitions) and proposing to Binghe almost constantly. This part of the world has a special ritual proposal wine? Better give some to Binghe! This demonic cult requires one to present a specific monster kill to their intended? Shen Qingqiu just so happened to kill one such monster himself and now he's given it over to Binghe to claim the parts (Binghe's cultivation would make better use of them!) They're visiting a neighboring sect where couples traditionally tie their wrists together with a particular type of rope as a symbol of engagement? Somehow, someway, Shen Qingqiu is going to find a good reason to tie himself to Binghe with the betrothal rope.

Not only is this dance giving Luo Binghe intense mixed feelings, and causing him to lie awake at night trying to figure out if Shen Qingqiu somehow does actually know what he's doing, and wants Binghe to bamboozle him into a marriage (or is that just wishful thinking??), it also causes him ever-more stress whenever SQQ goes on a mission with anyone else.

Especially Liu Qingge.

What if he does the clueless not-proposing to Liu Qingge? What if Liu Qingge proves to be less strong-willed than Luo Binghe (absolutely possible) and "accepts"? What if he's stupid enough to not figure out that Shen Qingqiu is a clueless idiot, and thinks it's genuine?

Shizun might marry him just to avoid having an awkward conversation!

Anyway things come to a head when finally, for once, Luo Binghe is the one who does the accidental proposal. And this time Shen Qingqiu does notice, and he gets all flustered and scolds Binghe to "be more careful" and "not waste such gestures on this old master, or anyone Binghe doesn't want taking advantage!" and Luo Binghe, who has aged one thousand decades in the past few years, still nobly resists the urge to lay out all the times Shizun has made this exact same "mistake" towards him and instead just confesses. Shoots his shot. Now or never!

He almost immediately regrets it because he had a whole plan for how to slowly ease Shizun into the idea over the course of several years, and he's prepared to be rejected now that he's fucked that up. Because he knows his master is delicate about stuff like this. Why else would he be so atypically obtuse?

But, well. Shen Qingqiu always said that the most realistic thing about the harem was that no one in their right mind would turn down a marriage proposal from Luo Binghe.

So he just, uh, says yes?

Binghe's like, you mean this whole time all I had to do was be the one to ask?!

But also he's really too happy to give a shit about the particulars either. They will have a beautiful wedding! No take backs. If SQQ gets cold feet then Luo Binghe has a list and compiled evidence of fifty million marriage proposals from him, so now he definitely has to follow through!