idk who needs to hear this rn but suffering is not noble. take the tylenol
apparently people are now purchasing thick water to make slimes with because of a trend on tiktok
thick water is for disabled people who can’t swallow properly. stores usually have extremely limited supplies of it.
please don’t buy thick water for fun or to make slime with. it’s literally the only way some disabled people can drink anything. It’s not a fucking toy
i think that “people with limited mobility or ability to leave their homes deserve the same access to goods and services via home delivery” and “the exploitation of workers through gig delivery apps is Bad” are two sentiments that can and should exist simultaneously in the brains of like… anyone with the capacity to think lmao
My take on people reclaiming the r slur, as someone with cognitive and developmental disabilities. Warning, I will be referring to a racial slur in this post. It will be censored.
The r slur means slow. It is made specifically to mock "slow" people like me, people with a specific group of disabilities that impair us in a very specific way. Unless you are someone who is slow, that word does not apply to you and your cannot reclaim it. Honestly, even I hesitate to say it because while I have one of those specific disabilities, I am not intellectually disabled and so my ability to use that slur, to me, is not promised and I do not want to offend.
"Who are you to tell me I can't reclaim a slur used on me?"
Okay, so here's the thing. I'm Irish. Back in the day, racists used to call the Irish white n-words. That slur has been used against the Irish just as the r slur has been used against you. For the Irish, people hurled the meanest thing they could think of at us, and to them, comparing us to Black people was the worst thing they could possibly do. Similarly, ableists have referred to you as the r slur because they think that comparing you to people with intellectual disability is the worst possible insult they can hurl in your direction. Are you following?
Do the Irish have the right to reclaim the n-word just because it was used against us to "insult" us by comparing us to Black people? No, of course not. Because even though that word was used against us, it's a slur against Black people. Irish people who aren't Black don't get to reclaim that slur. Only Black people can reclaim it.
Similarly, if a straight man who was just a bit too queer-looking is bullied and called the f slur, because comparing him to gay people is the worst insult his bullies can think of, does he have the right to reclaim the f slur? No. The slur doesn't apply to him. It's been hurled in his direction but at the end of the day, he isn't gay. Just like the Irish aren't Black, and you are not intellectually disabled.
The r slur was made specifically to target people with intellectual disability. Outside of people with intellectual disability, there are very few groups to whom that word applies.
You can't reclaim a slur that doesn't apply to you. Even if it was used against you, there's a difference between being insulted by being compared to someone like me and actually having that word hurled at you because you are like me. I'm sorry people were ableist to you, but that's not your slur to reclaim. There are ones that apply to you. Ableists were very thorough. Please reclaim one that applies to you.
hey i just wanted to give a shout out to people with personality disorders real quick. your disorder doesn't make you evil, it doesnt make you an abuser, and it doesnt make you unlovable. you're just as deserving of respect, care, and support as people without personality disorders. stay safe, i love you and i hope you have a happy holiday season. we're in this together <3
Do you have any advice for dealing with Kleptomania? I'm realizing I might be...uh...that, and it's one of those things people stigmatize to hell and back, but not one of those things I've seen or heard a lot about.
I'm not dumb enough to think it's just "uwu help I'm so quirky I stole stuff" disease and it's probably not like...completely uncontrollable, but I tend to experience worse symptoms when I'm stressed and feel out of control, so any advice would help a ton.
First of all, I am so sorry you deal with this as well. I absolutely understand how stressful and overwhelming it can be, especially when you're first realizing it.
My biggest piece of advice is try and find ways to reroute it..kinda like creating loopholes for it so that the urge to steal can still be satisfied in non dangerous ways (e.g ways that won't result in prison time or legal trouble)
This is how I've managed to cope with it and the symptoms have become much less stressful. My number 1 loopholes are:
Taking things that aren't owned by anyone and allowing my brain to view it as stealing. (Pennies on the ground, rocks outside of restaurants, free pens or candies from businesses etc.)
"Borrowing" things from my friends and partners, especially those who know about my kleptomania and make a big deal of pretending to really be concerned about what I've taken.
Advice that doesn't relate to actually giving in (somewhat) to the urges are:
Keeping my hands busy while in stores or other locations that trigger the impulses. I like to use subtle stim toys, but things like a phone can help too.
Wearing clothing that would make it super hard to steal (bright clothing, no pockets, very small bags etc) Knowing that I wouldn't be able to get away with it tends to keep me from giving in.
Listening to music or journaling helps with the anxiety that comes along with it.
I've only recently been actively working on this, but as I discover more things I'll share them here. And if you have any other questions, please feel free to ask!! I hope this helps 💜💜
had an interaction a few days ago that i’m still thinking about. I was talking to two students about the Day of Silence protest coming up that friday, and both of them seemed interested but needed more information. Both of these students were disabled with relatively high support needs for communication, processing, and learning. At least one was intellectually disabled.
I explained the basic premise of Day of Silence, and one of the students asked me to repeat myself, explain again. I did this several times, and she was engaged with me, even if she wasn’t processing yet she clearly wanted to know more and was interested in what i was saying. Her para-educator then came over and said it wasn’t worth trying to explain anything to her because she wouldn’t understand.
The para-educator’s intentions were good, she wanted to save me time and believed i may not have known this student was disabled. But to say that, in front of the student, as though she couldn’t hear the comment, is rude at best and downright hostile at worst. Furthermore, to be in a position in which you are the one in charge of helping this person navigate the world, and to believe they only deserve information that you think they can digest, is such an awful way to view someone you are supposed to help. This student was asking me questions, she was listening, and honestly - who cares if in the end she didn’t understand? just because we don’t end up understanding something doesn’t mean we can’t engage with it.
Intellectually disabled individuals and disabled individuals in general are not infants, they’re not incapable of learning or connecting with others. Yes, they may need extra help, and yes, some topics may be too complex for them to tackle, but let the individual decide that for themselves.
TLDR: The person who was supposed to be helping an intellectually disabled student navigate the world decided for that student what they could understand. In doing so, she projected her beliefs about the students abilities and overshadowed the student’s ability to define her own boundaries. Intellectually disabled people deserve the autonomy to decide for themselves what they want to engage with at a given time, not told they are too dumb to understand.
give me a show with disabled queer representation. and I don't just mean amputee that is not affected at all by their amputation because "we're all basically the same- woo friends!". I don't just mean non descript wheelchair user that uses a hospital wheelchair. give me young queers using canes and rollators and white canes and powerchairs. and give them bright hair and make them neurodivergent and have struggles in life relating to them not fitting in with a lot of abled queer representations and "disabled friendly" pride events that aren't disabled friendly. make them black, make the Asian, make them fat, make them interesting. make them angry, make them punk, make them pastel, make them have interest and passions, have them protest, show them taking breaks and having to take care of themselves. please.
Obnoxious how most anti-infantilization activism in many low support-centric autistic communities seems to rely on arguing we don't need support rather than reducing the stigma attatched to needing support.
Simply put, most anti-infantilization autistic activism I see is about how we don't need to be talked to slowly, need 24/7 care, don't need help with going to the toilet, don't need help shopping, etc. because we 'aren't toddlers'.
Which is a bad kind of activism, because, uh, many of us DO need those things. This is a fact. Ignoring it won't make it go away. And saying that only children need those things IS infantilization.
What we SHOULD be arguing is that adults who have medium to high support needs and who need help with or just can't do basic tasks, can't speak or can't speak well, need to have things explained slowly/repeatedly, etc. are still adults and deserve to be respected as such. Having higher support needs isn't childish.
No, people shouldn't assume that all autistics have higher support needs. But autistics with lower support needs also shouldn't erase those who do, when they are ALWAYS the ones most impacted by infantilization.
people who have meltdown because " small " thing go wrong - always bigger than people believe .
people who get angry and defensive when someone try bully and hurt - can not " just " ignore like everyone say .
people who feel actually violent when something upset - who need time and place to go hit things , so that not hurt people .
people who can not understand how stay calm and walk away - who instead get frustrate and say shut up go away .
and anyone else who relate to this - that can not control how react , not so easy like that .
there is benefits in have skill , but , not deserve to beat self up for not have skill . people should support if or when try learn , but also , should support even before learn , give outlets and patience .
some people will forever have less skill , because brain physically can not adapt and learn right . some people have episodes and crises where control impossible . still do not make bad person . still deserve support .
I love you level 1 autistics
I love you level 2 autistics
I love you level 3 autistics
I love you autistics who can talk verbally
I love you autistics you use AAC or other aids like sign language
I love you autistics with no professional diagnosis
I love you early diagnosed autistics
I love you late diagnosed autistics
I love you queer/trans autistics
I love you autistics who don't look autistic
I love you autistics who do look autistic
I love you autistics with co-morbid conditions (intellectual disabilities, ADHD, ARFID, etc.)
I love you autistics with 'scary' mental disorders (dissociative disorders, personality disorders, schizospec, etc)
I love you autistics with high empathy
I love you autistics with low empathy
I love you physically disabled autistics
I love you autistics! <3
Raven, he/him, 20, multiple disabled (see pinned for more details.) This is my disability advocacy blog
282 posts