Sorry I Was Looking At My Own Boobs What Were You Saying

get yourself a main character whos two primary emotions are "little cunt" and "catatonic with grief"

[falls in the shower] parkour

i dont even care if a bigfoot comes up to my tent or walks in front of my car at this point like i have my own problems

so hard to beat the “annoying” allegations when you’re annoying

”okay but are you normal about-“ no. I’m an insane pervert.

You're in her dms well i'm in my jammies. goodnight

i heard he died of wanting snacks

i only set you on fire a little bit. grow up.

They’re soulmates but one of them is infact trying to choke the other to death with the red string of fate tying them together

Imaginr if there were Two women with something Gay & Weird going on