beqqq

Latest Posts by beqqq

experimental linguists hard at work in a top secret facility to discover the Ultimate Universal Slur

let’s be real the best tumblr has EVER looked was the short span of time where you could slap code into posts and we had classics like these

tumblr has never been closer to the core aesthetic and sense of humor of its userbase 

All you fuckers are like “pop tarts are ravioli!” “Uncrustables are ravioli!”

I will hit you in the face with the concepts of convergent evolution and analogous structures

to anyone who missed it:

blorbo - a favourite character

glup shitto - star wars names are fucking nonesense

eeby deeby - youre going to hell

plinko horse - a horse that was stuck in a plinko board

scrimblo bimblo - super smash bro fans can be very angry when characters aren't in a game

i am indifferent towards your shoelaces

My three girlfriends. And yes, they smoke weed.

This Lyrebird is living in a zoo which has been under construction for a while and now it is imitating the sound of construction.

tumblr ads until 2018: look at this weird submarine look at this weird fish look at this weird airplane! do not approve this ad fhgjafdahjdkg1. insurance discounts for seniors 85+!

tumblr ads 2018-2022: buy disney buy aamazon buy hulu buy disneysplus buy netflix you should kill yourself now. buy amazon

tumblr ads 2022: shave your balls!!! buy a bong! pray with an app! shave your fucking balls!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Since Kung Pow Penis is coming back into the tumblrina’s arsenal, and new users are supposedly coming here from twitter who might not know in the first place, I think people need a bit of a reminder how to use it properly. You should only start or continue a KPP attack if OP is the one you’re trying to use it on. If you use it on somebody who added to the post, they won’t see shit past the initial K, and a potentially undeserving OP will have their notifications spammed by stray letters for ages.

With great power comes great responsibility, and with great Kung Pow comes great Penis.

FUCK silverfish

imagine youre cinderella and youre running away from the ball and your. actually i cant tell which shoe would be funnier to lose 

i dont even care what day it is. i found it. i found them

fingers in his ass sunday

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

im a published poet

dialogue between an AI and a poet

poem by me, 3.21.2020

The Beginning

ive had this account since sometime in 2019 i think although ive been using tumblr longer than that but i never properly organized or tagged anything the whole time so i have like ~300 reblogs (most of which are private) that i feel like organizing via tags + deleting a decent amount of them probably

most of what remains is still probably gonna be private just because i dont know whats in here and i dont want to be cringe even though i dont actually think anyone is gonna look at my profile individually

finally giving in to the urge to use tumblr unironically.. crazy. this will reduce the amount of tumblr screenshots taking up space in my cloud storage + slightly decrease the unreasonable amount of tabs i currently have open on my laptop

HELP THEMS

aye can i get uh………ingredients on my burger

sooooo can yall help me determine if this is a fireable offense

most disgusting part of Tumblr Culture is the kid who love to sag their pirt. not only to sag the jam lid, but to pirt it up. what a waste.

everyone stop what you’re doing and look at this baby pelican

This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8

ough

‘Filthy Frank’ is the first example of a dedication to an 'esoteric aesthetic post-post-modernistic nihilist’ philosophy. His success mainly lies with how awful he gets. The people don’t want anything good. They want disturbance. This allowed him to make anything. Anything. Make fun of how you make shitty videos but it’s the only way you eat. Who gives a fuc- NOÖNE He knows it’s what works. Frank’s meta humour and comments on existentialism I think come from watching South Park (which is required viewing for all children) and hanging out with Twitter-user 'baldinternetman’, who is/was also known as 'Dade’. The account overall is depreßing. Lots of existentialist thought. The baldo was openly talking about Kirkegaard and other philosophers. They probably met at college and I’d speculate that perhaps he could have helped behind the scenes. I have no time to get into 'Pink Guy’. That’s a weeeeeeird aesthetic. But it sells. Overall; George Miller’s films will be celebrated through the generations.