Latest Posts by cyanospectre - Page 3
What kink are you most embarrassed by?
all of them. or at least most of them. i do want to learn how to rid myself of that embarrassment, though.
what’s the most problematic thing that turns you on?
still figuring this one out, anon.
what do you find hot about sh?
mental illness, primarily. both the fact that i am mentally ill and the fact that i love mentally ill people. trauma is just hot. physical and emotional.
what’s your favorite vampire and why
not a question i ever thought i'd be asked. uhh i don't really know if i have a favorite :(
i mean i consume a lot of media with vampires IN it, i grew up with castlevania and i'm a huge jjba fan...
so i guess Alucard (even though he's not TECHNICALLY a vampire, he's a dhampir) or Dio Brando. specifically part 1 Dio because his design is so fucking goated.
oh and the vampire on the title screen of vampire survivors. he's the only one in the game.
What is your favorite porn category?
i don't watch porn, really! it's not that i don't want to or don't have access to it, i just don't really find the need to most of the time. i had unrestricted internet access from a very young age (like i had access to a computer and the internet when i wasn't even old enough to walk straight). i probably had a porn addiction at some point in my life, though. maybe i should give it a comeback to make myself more of a pervert or smth.
so i don't know if i really have any particular "favorites." i guess things like milfs?? and i guess "femboys" or whatever but i don't like categorizing a whole group of people as a porn category! i just like feminine men.
Have you/would you rape someone? if so what’s is your biggest fantasy or what happened?
have i? no. the only "physical" crime i've committed is trespassing when i was 9. at least the only thing that could be considered a real crime, you know?
would i? depends, again. is it a random person that i just met? maybe. is it someone i actually know/trust? probably not! i wouldn't want to betray their trust in me and risk losing them forever for me taking that one step too far. unless they wouldn't remember it, of course.
but again, i'm still clinging to morality.
i don't know if i have any specific fantasies at the moment, but i suppose gr00ming has been particularly hot to me recently... and maybe stuff like date r4pe/somno. like either taking someone out on a date and slipping pills into their drink or just straight up breaking into their house. (i know how to pick locks! kinda.)
what are your thoughts on younger guys?
depends! i'm far more open to younger guys and guys my age than i am older. older men just tend to be gross or try to hard (and they tend to be selfish!)
but it depends on stuff like who they are, really. but i'm totally open to younger guys, i feel like that's something i haven't quite explored here yet.
i'd love to be an older brother :)
what’s the perviest thing you’ve done irl?
not entirely sure how to answer this unfortunately...
i haven't done much that's explicitly perverted on purpose (i still try to cling to some aspects of my morality and like... shame, as much as i try to get rid of both). but i suppose i've lightly touched myself in class (not to the point of orgasm but it was still something).
and also i'm terrible at remembering little things so i might have done something way weirder!!
no wonder people think I'm submissive... I mean I am sometimes but I love being more dominant, too! I guess I just struggle with confidence and comfort when it comes to stuff like this. god knew I would be too powerful if I didn't have anxiety.
even when I'm anon, I struggle pretty heavily with saying things because they just feel wrong. I always just end up being so polite because I'm terrified of scaring people off, I don't want to make them think I'm weird or gross. I want to make friends and respect people's boundaries, but it's hard to do both!!
this prob doesn't make any sense :(
even when I'm anon, I struggle pretty heavily with saying things because they just feel wrong. I always just end up being so polite because I'm terrified of scaring people off, I don't want to make them think I'm weird or gross. I want to make friends and respect people's boundaries, but it's hard to do both!!
this prob doesn't make any sense :(
i'll be honest, i didn't know where to put the sexual one. not sure if that IS where it's most accurate, i'm just currently really bad at expressing my more dirty thoughts. any advice for breaking that anxiety or gathering my thoughts about it would be greatly appreciated. (anons are open... not that i'm convinced anyone will send any.)
ughhhh I wish I had more to post about but it's kind of demotivating knowing that people won't really see it.
i mean, like... sure, that MIGHT mean that i can type whatever i want and not feel embarrassed. but it's not like it's that easy. i wish i was better at coming up with scenarios (or at least expressing them through words. not that i'm good at picturing them either, i'm aphantasic).
and there's some stuff that i'm not READY to express through words on here yet. i don't even really know if i'm ready to accept some things about myself anyway.
i just need to explore some more parts of myself. and there's some things that i need people to ask/talk to me about because it's probably not possible for me to just come out and say it. i don't really know what i mean by this yet but i'll keep tumblr posted.
inviting my favorite mutuals to a playhouse (sex dungeon) where we have so much fun together!! (freaky sex where we roleplay as a big, happy family)
also sometimes i forget that all of the thoughts i put here are literally public and then i start tweaking out like "oh god what if i make friends on here and then they find out i'm a freak"
like i mean obviously i'm a freak by being on this side of tumblr but i'm still embarrassed by the level of it D:
i don't normally remember my dreams but i dreamed about ace attorney guys i might be a little bit... gulp... obsessed? no way!!!
last post of the night (...probably...)
i NEED to get drunk and send people incoherent, horny asks on tumblr. or just incoherent... that sounds equally fun.
or high. i get really fucking horny when i'm high for some reason.
i wish i had a stalker tbh
like a real one who would follow me home and watch my every move.
the kind that writes diary entries in their own blood, leaves their hair and clothes in my presence to let me know that i'm not alone.
and when they prove their love to me, they're going to make sure i reciprocate by any means necessary. that i'll be theirs, only theirs, from that point forward.
but alas, maybe i'm the one who has to be that stalker.
if i had the death note i would make a billionaire donate all of his money to charity and then sh00t himself on live television
i think i focus too much on older women tbh but they've been on my mind a lot recently
don't get me wrong, gr00mers are the scum of the earth but also IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!!!!
it'll be shit like this and then right next to it is the fluffiest, silliest ace attorney yaoi i've ever seen.
also just this, in general.
Kid raping their parent? Grinding on dad’s lap cause they saw it on TV? Sucking mom’s tits when they’re at no age to be feeding?
my home page is a 50/50 mixture of the most down bad shit known to mankind, the kinds of things that would make god fall to his knees in tears, wondering what he had wrought upon the world he claimed to love... and the other half is gay lawyers and toxic yaoi.
i love tumblr.
problems with sharing a room
they snore!!
they're generally loud in their sleep
we have different sleeping preferences (like temperature and shit)
(and i can't stress this enough) i can't goon all night!!! i mean, i probably wouldn't anyway but i'd at least like to have the option.
does anyone have 55 quettatons of tnt for me to use
i'm going to do something REALLY funny (blow up the sun)
i wish i was better at dirty talk
i wish i was better at explaining exactly what i want to do to/with someone
i wish i was better at actually going through on my mental plans
i wish i was a little bit taller, i wish i was a baller
i wish i had a girl who looked good, i would call her
kicking my feet and giggling while scrolling through klapollo and narumitsu/wrightworth posts
manifesting ace attorney now... give me lawyer yaoi, tumblr WHERE ARE YOU HIDING IT???
the affirmations didn't work...
ugh i wish i was a good writer because i would be writing so many lawlight fanfics. and NO i'm not just not doing it because i'm a pussy!! i'm also a bad writer who can't portray dialogue!!
daily affirmations
I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT DEATH NOTE AND ALL OF ITS CHARACTERS
LIGHT AND L ARE BOTH CANONICALLY STRAIGHT ACCORDING TO THE AUTHOR
I AM NOT L AND I WILL NEVER BE L
my entire home page is death note yaoi...
i think i've won. this is victory, folks.
as much as i love the freaky shit, this is just as good.