I Would Like To Offer My Condolences To All Christians On The Passing Of Pope Francis. Pope Francis Died

smart girl spring 💐📚☀️🌷🎀

spring is here & we're in the final stretch! time for floral prints & bows, study picnics, drinking matcha & eating fresh fruit while doing schoolwork, walking around campus during study breaks, finding a sunny spot to sit and read, seeing the flowers start to bloom, & soaking it all up before summer break rolls around!

cool things i've been up to!

i've been sewing a lot!

so far, I've made, a tote bag (so, so cute, but I gotta wash it so the marking chalk washes off) and I'm currently working on a makeup pouch! I want to make cute summer tops and scandi shorts and pants, basically my whole wardrobe!

i started my sourdough starter

literally this sunday but, at first she died :( because I forgot I live in tropical weather and fed her as if I was in England or something

BUT then I found a different guide and I'm following it and she's thriving, I can't wait to make foccaccia!

i'm rewatching friends

honestly I love it but also rewatching i'm like guys, that is unhealthy lol, such a funny show but i can see it was the 90s (the fits are on point tho)

i'm daydreaming about my future home

i want a white house, with blue shutters...

no just kidding, but I do want a classical house in the countryside with a big garden and to have my own homestead with chickens and cats and carrots and a ton of natural light from the windows and a crafting studio for me

I'm trad-curious like, I want that nature connected life, not the 1950's mindset crap

things I wanna do!

i want to start a garden!

i still don't really know how my living situation will be because of my first year of college yet, but as soon as I do, I want to start a little vegetable garden, i want to hone my homesteading skills

i want to learn to knit

I spent over $60 on YARN, and I haven't used it! tbh it's cause the sound of yarn like existing makes my sensory issues go die but aaaaa I wanna make sweaters, honestly w my headphones on it should be fine but, I just love sewing rn!

i want to exercise again

guys the senior slump is real, like I'm blogging in school rn, and it's like I go to school and since i don't work nor rest I get home drained and feeling unaccomplished :( honestly i want to get my life together but school is such a roadblock! I can't wait for college to have calculus and physics and chem all day long, so that I can come home to my books and my sewing and my gym yk? anyways, I have access to the gym on my street now, and since summer is back, we can use the a.c, so, it's an easy way to get back in it

i want to take better care of my body

in disordered eating recovery, i think that exercise and nutrition wise (at least my relationship w both), i've got it covered, but i've been biting my nails again, and i don't like it, but i can't seem to stop, i just gotta break the inertia of it, if i get up and do my nails, i wont bite them

i think that's it, i lololoooove yapping, so expect these kinds of posts from me!

xoxo,

sofi

getting out of your own head ✧˚ · .

i've had a topsy-turvy mental health journey in my time and i know that i am really good at self-victimising, self-blaming, and falling into thought spirals where i agonise over events and perceptions that are so tiny in real life.

it is important for me to identify when i am engaging in unhelpful behaviour, so i can find a way to shift. it feels like the hardest thing in the world but healing is a journey unique to everyone.

the info below comes from a single source and i hope to expand on mental health info in the future, but it might be helpful if you have an anxious mind or you're an overthinker.

<image from pinterest, below info source: becoming the one by sheleana aiyana>

BEHAVIOUR THAT KEEPS YOU STUCK IN YOUR HEAD

Responding to feelings by pulling them apart and looking for meaning

Denying how you feel because it doesn't make logical sense

Trying to talk yourself out of feeling sad, anxious, etc

Coming up with a reason for feelings

Overexplaining feelings

Feeling "numb"

Feeling embarassed or exposed by your feelings

Focusing on the "facts" as if emotions have no value or purpose

BEHAVIOUR TO BRING YOU INTO YOUR BODY

Noticing an emotion as it arises and naming it: "I'm feeling sad, angry, joyful, nervous, etc."

Locating and identifying bodily sensations: "I feel tightness in my belly, my chest is feeling constricted, there is tension in my jaw."

Using "I think" when you have a thought and "I feel" when you have an emotion, and knowing the difference

Allowing your feelings and sensations to be there without needing to make sense of them

Creating opportunities to move energy through the body (dance, screaming into a pillow, deep breathing)

 SKILLS FOR THE EMOTIONALLY CONNECTED

Able to differentiate between thoughts, sensations, and feelings

Knowing when to take time and space to process intense emotions before making a decision or initiating a conversation

Trusting the body and exploring the messages it delivers without self-judgment

Being meditative and noticing when the mind is making up a story or being self-critical

Bringing presence into the body when overthinking or spiraling into fear and worry

Having a few favourite self-soothing methods, or reaching out for support when overwhelmed

Valuing both emotion and logic at different times

Making space for a spiritual practice and radical acceptance in your life

Little things that improved my life 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Accepting my sleep schedule. I'm a night owl; I focus at night, I'm calm at night, I'm motivated at night. For a long time, I tried to fight this since everyone always preaches getting up early, but since I started accepting my natural sleep schedule, I've been feeling a lot better and have become way more productive.

"drink more water". TEA. Tea is the secret here. I will be honest, I hate drinking water; it doesn't matter if I have a cute water bottle or a cute glass, I still hate it. TEA.

Replying quickly. I used to be one of those people who get a text message and think, "Oh, I'll reply to that later", and then just forget about it entirely. Now, I text back as soon as I see the message. This has not only improved my texting anxiety (which I cause on my own by now replying and then feeling bad) but also deepened my connection to my friends. <3

Keeping my circle small and being okay with that. Over the past months, I've had this sudden urge to expand my social circle and get to know more and more people, especially after I moved in August. However, this quickly ended in what I like to call my "social burnout". I was tired, annoyed, and overwhelmed. It took a few weeks for it to settle, but I've come to the conclusion that I would much rather have a smaller circle of people who I trust and love deeply than a huge group of friends, and that's totally okay.

Wearing what I like. Even though I live in a big city, I'd still say that my style can sometimes be a bit more extravagant than what most people wear, another point is that I'm very uncomfortable with pants so I only wear skirts, which is also considered a bit odd where I live. But over the past years, I've come to accept that and have become so sure of myself and found such comfort in my style that I now just wear whatever I like, and it makes every day a little bit nicer.

Reading and writing for pleasure. Reading books outside of my studies and spending time researching topics that simply interest me is such a great way to calm your mind. Same for writing, I always like to say that to write is to think; putting your thoughts on paper in cohesive and well-crafted sentences that you can then reread and think over again is such a liberating thing to do.

Reaching out more. fuck the whole "double texting" and "no contact" thing. If you want to speak to someone because they mean something to you, then just do it. Unless they specifically asked for space, you shouldn't feel bad about wanting to be in touch with them. Many even really appreciate it when you show that you truly care. Let's stop the nonchalant act, and instead, let's face deep emotions and true vulnerability. <3

As always, please feel free to share your own little insights and things that helped you improve comments! <3

my insta: @ malusokay

love ya ･:*₊‧✩

Week 1 Evaluation

It's been a week since I've started this journey, so let's reflect on how the first week has been!

First of all, let's have a refresher on what my GOALS for this 30 days initially is~

Fixing my sleep schedule

Incorporate more physical activities (doesn't have to be exercising, can be stretches or walks!)

Drawing more often for practice

Sleep:

I'd say sleep wise, I'm slowly getting better at it. Though, there are moments where I couldn't get myself to sleep and ended up getting worse. But in general, I think I've made good progress than before I started on this journey, so good job me! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

Physical activities:

I'm pretty proud of my progress for this! So far, I've managed to do something everyday for the past week to get my body moving! Whether it be actually following along exercising videos on Youtube or some stretching to ease some tension on muscles! Again, good job to myself uwu

Drawing:

Now this. I did NOT meet this goal at all during this entire week, which is a shame. I think I was focusing a lot on taking better care of my own body that the thought of taking care of my skill set kinda slipped my mind? Which, to be fair, is kind of expected since even trying to remind myself to do certain basic self care task is difficult in itself. So, it's okay, we'll just have to do better during the following week~

Extras:

Other extra stuff for my health that I think would I've done well is also finally taking my meds and vitamins. Though it's not consistent yet, I'm glad I finally was able to take them more than I was before. This goes for my water intake as well! Sometimes I would go on days without drinking any water at all, which is quite bad... But now that I'm trying to actively record down my days and what I've done to better my body, it serves as a reminder in itself to drink more water, so yayyy another great job done for me °ʚ(´꒳`)ɞ°

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Things I need to improve/add for the following week:

After a week into this journey, I think I'd like to adjust some of my goals and be a little more specific in what I want to achieve for hopefully the next week! This will help me be a little clearer with what I need to do and help myself feel good in the future >:)

Try to sleep 30 mins earlier than the last, but the latest time for me to go to bed would be 3am. I have been doing quite okay with only a few slips here and there on this. So hopefully by the end of the next week, I can somehow sleep around 12am instead.

Still moving my body every single day, but let's try to exercise 3 times this week for at least 30 minutes! It's been a long time since I've exercised that I forgot how good I always feel afterwards both physically and mentally. So yes, I'd like to challenge myself to actually do some exercise more often! ( *` • ω •´)ゝ

Since I have 0 progress on my drawing, I want to start slow and easy myself into it. Since it feels daunting (for some reason), let's try achieving at least 30 minutes per day for 3 days of art practice. Can be anything, like anatomy, color study, or even just my own personal art. As long as it reaches the goal I set, then it's good :>

Socialite In Training 🦋

Go out to dinner at least once a week. Try places you’ve never been before. Make an effort to hit up as many places in your city as you can so that you will always have good recommendations for people, reviews on what’s good and what’s bad, and get to know different areas better. Obviously don’t go broke doing this. Just try to dine out as often as financially feasible for you. Be friendly with the staff and make an impression on them and trust me, the special treatment will quickly come once you become a regular.

Always dress tf up. No matter if you’re walking your dog, grocery shopping, getting your nails done, depositing a check at the bank, or making a dentist appointment. Always look cute. This doesn’t mean you need to bust out a ball gown, but make sure your clothes look good, hair is done, accessories are on, and your personal style shines bright. Don’t just put on items. Give the girls a Look.

Take multiple vacations a year. At least one should be by plane to your location of choice but if you don’t have the budget to do several far away trips per year, fill up your calendar with staycations at hotels that offer activities, resorts, spend a few days staying with some friends who are out of state, and any other getaway that appeals to you. A 2 day trip to a city that’s just a few hours drive from your house can absolutely be an amazing vacation. I do it all the time!

Expand your social circle and actually make plans with them. A trip to the nail salon with one, a joint grocery shopping trip with another, lunch at that cool place you’ve been frequenting with the third. Be a social butterfly. Make memories with people, even if they are just casual outings. If you meet someone and hit it off, text them! Make a plan to hang out and do something.

Be the flashiest and most authentic version of you. Buy the things you like and wear them with showstopping confidence. Use the phrases and slang words you like. Don’t be shy to listen to the music that is your guilty pleasure or watch your favorite shows that no one else seems to care about. Embrace every part of you and wear it proudly.

Go to all of the cool events in your area. Restaurant openings, new store openings, promotional events, community gatherings etc etc. Try to always keep fun events on your horizon. Plus it’ll give you more chances to wear those cute outfits you feel too shy to wear on a normal day just bopping around target. Those leather pants and strappy heels aren’t gonna wear themself!

start romanticising your reading

TLDR: choose your read, curate your space, and engage with the text

About three years ago, I was in the biggest reading slump. It was so bad that it had gotten to the point where I couldn't even read one sentence without picking up my phone to doom-scroll. At that point, I genuinely thought I could never ever get into reading again.

However, when I started romanticising my reading, I was able to finish a whole book in just one week. By romanticising my reading, it was no longer a chore, instead, it felt like an enjoyable experience where I could get lost in the emotions of the story.

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"How do you even romanticise reading?"

step #1 - choosing your read

pick something short and easy to read - a short story, a poetry collection, a graphic novel, an old favourite or comfort read

judge a book by its cover and pick something with a cover-art that interests you

pick something that matches your mood/feeling, here are some of my recommendations: want something gothic and eerie, filled with old secrets? We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson want something bittersweet and nostalgic with heartache? Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi want something empowering and thought-provoking? And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou want something whimsical and soft, filled with dreamy illustrations? Anne of Green Gables: A Graphic Novel by Mariah Marsden, illustrated by Brenna Thummler

step #2 - curate your space

replace your main lights for ambient lighting - fairy lights, candles, salt lamps, mushroom lamps, warm coloured LEDs

turn on some background music to build atmosphere for your book - 90s jazz for classic books, orchestral music for fantasy books

have a drink or snack that you love - I recommend an iced mocha or matcha for summers, and hot chocolate or green tea for winters

sit somewhere comfortable or somewhere that builds atmosphere - I have my bed next to my window which means it's comfortable when I read and I can also hear the crickets during summer nights

step #3 - engage with the text

use coloured pens or markers to highlight or underline your favourite quotes, and you can even assign different colours to different emotions

stick custom bookmarks or themed stickers to mark meaningful chapters or sections

start a collection jar with paper notes of your favourite quotes that you can read at the end of the year - you can write down the page, chapter, and book so you can always go back to where these quotes came from

jot down your current thoughts and feelings about certain chapters and sections so you can revisit the book in the future to see how your thoughts and interpretations have evolved over time - I like to date these annotations so I know exactly when I wrote my annotations

Remember that progress is still progress, even if it's small 🧸

What to do when you can’t sleep 💤 🌌🌙

Hi cuties! It is currently 3am while I’m writing this because I just woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep no matter what I did. This is pretty usual for me I am a chronic insomniac and even though I am medicated for it I still will wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to sleep. So here is what I do to make sure my day does not suck even when I only got a few hours of sleep.

First things first give yourself at least an hour without any lights or screen time.

You might still be able to fall back asleep but you got to give yourself the best chance so keep it dark get comfy and do breathing exercises.

If you need you can put on a meditation or breathing exercises video on YouTube those can help you focus rather than you doing it yourself.

If after that hour you are still not falling asleep you need to get out of your bed.

Your bed should be a place of rest so the only thing you should do is sleep in it. Sitting on your phone in your bed is going to create an unhealthy habit that is going to impact your sleep more.

The best thing I ever did for my sleep was making my bed a place I go to to sleep and only sleep

I like to start by realizing why I couldn’t sleep. Sometimes it’s insomnia. Sometimes it’s anxiety or stress. Sometimes it’s not feeling well (like physically sick)

If it’s anxiety or stress you can journal about it or if you are stressed because you have a big project you can even work on it some more or do some planning to make to make things easier. Or to ease your mind.

If you aren’t feeling well notice your symptoms and maybe take some medicine and try to feel better so you can go back to bed. If you are sick I recommend taking medicine then going back and trying to sleep again because that is the best thing for you.

Once you get up you need to understand that right now is probably the best you will feel the whole day.

You can only get more and more tired and you aren’t going to be able to go to sleep until your normal time (maybe a short five minute nap but anything longer you risk messing up your schedule more).

It’s not the most fun realization but it’s important

If you are like me and you just have insomnia or there is no real reason why you can’t sleep I recommend doing things that will make your day easier.

You are going to be exhausted for most the day probably so anything you can do right now while you feel okay is best.

You can clean your room. Write your to do list. I also love doing my laundry because I usually can get it done before I have to start my day. Anything that you can do that future (significantly more tired) you might need help with.

I also recommend waiting to drink caffeine until you would normally.

The reason for this is because if you wake up at 1am you do a couple things and you start to feel tired again you can still go to bed and get multiple hours of sleep before you have to wake up. But if you drink caffeine at 2am you basically have gotten rid of that chance.

Also because the crash would happen sooner in the day making you feel so much worse.

If you have nothing to do I recommend doing something calming with minimal blue light.

I like to listen to calming music and read. This can also help put you back into the mood of sleeping.

Blue light is the same as caffeine too much too early can make your chances of those extra hours extremely low.

Not sleeping is the literal worst thing to deal with on a regular basis. While my medications do help I still have sleepless nights pretty regularly. This is honestly the best thing you can do it sucks but it’s better to tough it out and be tired. Hopefully the next time you go to bed you’ll be so tired you fall asleep instantly. Also if you do struggle with insomnia regularly I recommend reaching out to your doctor because missing sleep is the worst thing for your health. As someone who had a whole year where I only slept a couple hours a week I know the full effects of sleep deprivation and it is not pretty. It might not be anything you are doing wrong it might be something only medication can fix and there is nothing wrong with that. I know that I will probably be on my sleeping meds my whole life but I’d rather take the pill than have another year like that one.

Xoxo rest well babes 💕