Latest Posts by scubagal015 - Page 4

John:What’s wrong with you?

Scott: Off the top of my head, I’d say low self-esteem, a lack of maternal affection, and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.

I see the glass half empty, Virgil sees it half full. That’s why we make such a good team. Alan on the other hand drinks straight from the bottle, John wonders why it has to be glass, and Gordon puts his feet up on the table and smashes it

- Scott

Parker : I made tea, m'lady

Penelope : No thank you, Parker

Parker : It’s not for you m'lady, it’s mine

Penelope : Well then why are you telling me?

Parker : It’s a conversation starter

Penelope : That’s a rubbish conversation starter

Parker : And yet we’re conversing, checkmate

Jeff: I’ve made the perfect taskforce .

Casey: [gesturing to the boys and Kayo] You’ve ruined a perfectly good bunch of kids, is what you’ve done. Look at them. They’ve got anxiety.

You think she’s listening but then she just does the exact opposite of what you say!

- Scott, about Kayo

Gordon: Why don’t I ever get to pilot 2? Is it because you’re the guy? The big macho man?

Virgil: No. It’s cause I didn’t think your little feet would reach the pedals

The Hood: Don’t call me a loser you idiot!

The mechanic:Don’t call me an idiot you loser!

Alan: Why are all these recipes, like, dangerous? Does food taste better if it’s kinda dangerous?

Grandma:Yes, it absolutely does

“4/20? I think you mean 1/5, reduce your fractions, did you even learn maths?”

- John

Flamethrower

Penelope:Everything alright Parker? You’re not afraid?

Parker: I’m afraid you won’t let me get a flame thrower and use it to throw flame

Penelope: You are quite right, I will not let you do that

The Hood : I need IR to help me, and I need them to come alone

Scott: and we need you to be less vague and less weird

Virgil: I relate to Belle because she has the same colouring as me, she’s imaginative, and she loves people for their souls.

Gordon: I relate to tinkerbell because if she’s not the centre of attention she dies

“ If I had a nickel for every time I was attacked by giant alligators I’d have… Well, I’d have one nickel. But it’s weird that it happened, right? ”

- Buddy

The Hood: *expresses basic human emotion*

Scott: what the fuck is this

John: Alan, I need to talk to Gordon, where is he?

Alan: Lady P is in the kitchen

John: I said I needed Gordon

Alan:… Ok, so what part of my answer did you not understand?

Alan: Thanks man, I owe you one

Gordon: I would die for you right now if you asked

Kayo: Rigby, I never doubted you for a moment!

Captain Rigby: Thank you, but you did, didn’t you?

Kayo: Yes, I doubted you strongly

Virgil: heck

Scott: look, I know this is a tense situation but watch your fucking language

I’m very laid back. I only care about two things: every person on Earth and their opinion of me, and the crushing psychological weight of being alive.

- Scott

“ When crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it’s ‘intelligent’ and ‘really cool’ but when I do it I’m ‘petty’ and ‘need to move on’.”

- Kayo

Virgil: Scott, please keep an eye on Lemar today. He’s going to say the wrong thing to the wrong person and get himself punched in the face.

Scott: I’d love to see him get punched!

Virgil: Try again.

Scott: I’ll make sure Lemar doesn’t get punched.

Virgil: Correct.

Gordon: I’ll do whoever it takes for us to succeed in our mission.

Alan: Don’t you mean “whatever”?

Gordon: Yeah, I’ll do that too.

Penelope : Can you imagine not being human and just living out your days as a weeping willow, though? beautiful? by the water? unburdened? ideal

Parker: I want to be the one from Harry Potter that beats the shit out of everyone and everything

Gordon: *is choking*

Ellie: Help! I’m trying to call 911 but the 9 button won’t work!

Buddy: Don’t worry. Just turn the 6 button around and use it as a 9.

Ellie [looking amazed]: You’re a genius!

Gordon [stops choking for a second]: What the actual fuck?

Alan: [still pacing around 6 hours after visiting an aquarium]

Gordon : what did you think a tiger shark was, Allie?

John: [kicks the door open with a panicked look]

Scott: What did you do?!

John : Nobody died!

Scott : WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?

Gordon: When you meet someone for the first time and it’s new and exciting. You know that rush?

Virgil: No. No, see, when I first meet somebody it’s mostly panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.

Alan: Okay, I know I made a slight mistake-

Kayo: Whatever you’re gonna say, save it for ten seconds .

Alan: What happens in ten seconds?

Kayo: Just hang on for another five seconds, and know that we’ve all been there at one point or another.

Alan: What happens in five seconds?

Scott, storming into the room: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, ALAN?

Kayo, pointing at Scott: That.

Scott*to the Hood*: I’m not scared of you, none of us are!

Alan: I’m kinda scared of him

Scott: shut up Alan

Scott: You think I enjoy being the mother hen to you all?

Virgil:

John:

Kayo:

Gordon:

Alan:

Scott:… Alright fine! It’s like crack to me!