You Have To Admit There Are Some Joys In Life That Can Only Be Felt Due To Hardship. A Common Example

Arthur Rimbaud (b. 20 October 1854)

youth is a social contruct

my favorite love language is trying, actually

One key part of relationships (platonic, romantic, etc) is communication. We all hear this. It’s said constantly. Communication.

But there’s a difference between proper communication and well… not proper communication.

There’s a difference between saying:

“I’m feeling insecure because my brain is being rude. It’s not your fault, but could you please give me some reassurance?”

And

“I’m so worthless. No one cares about me. Why do I even try?”

If you want someone to be there for you, please ask them. Don’t hint at it. Don’t guilt at it. I know asking directly can be scary but it is usually so much less draining for both of you than having to play a guessing game. The latter example is not proper communication. You may think the message is clear, but other people’s minds don’t work the same as yours. With that said, maybe the message is clear but the person feels really drained by the way you’re going about it and won’t engage because of that. And that’s super valid. 

If you have needs in a relationship, please communicate them clearly and don’t expect people to read your mind. 

sadness, grief, anger, etc. might feel comfortable because they’re familiar, but that doesn’t make them good for you. feel them, but don’t let them overtake you.

forgive yourself for things you did when you didn’t know better, for things you think you could have controlled but realistically couldn’t, for things you can’t take back. let yourself heal without reopening the wounds to punish yourself every time you’re reminded of your regret.