"why should I get invested in shows if they'll just get canceled" I was deeply invested in Heroes (2006) and it was not canceled, it just got really terrible. I also got really invested in the sandwich I had a few weeks ago despite it only lasting like 15 minutes. You must embrace the ephemeral. You must be willing to love things that may not love you back, that might betray you, or that may die an untimely death. As the great philosopher Mr. Mitchell Lee Hedberg said "I'm not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end."
I think one of the kindest things you can do for people with various mental health struggles is just... let people back into your life after they've been absent for a while.
Making friends as an adult is so fucking hard already and isolating yourself from other people is a very common symptom of depression, anxiety, burnout, ocd, trauma, grief, etc. Which means that someone will do the hard work of recovery/healing and resurface back into a world where their previous friends have written them off because they stopped showing up.
So if you know someone where you're like "yeah we could have been better friends but they fell off the map a bit" and that person suddenly reaches out, or starts showing up to events even though you kind of forgot they were still in the group chat... well they may have been Going Through It and you don't actually have to punish them for their absence you can just be glad that they're back.
“I don’t want you to save me. I want you to stand by my side as I save myself.”
— Unknown
You’re tired. Burnt out. Exhausted. Stressed.
This lowers your capacity for emotional regulation.
You’ll cry more easily. Get dragged into low moods more easily. Simple little things where you’re like ‘dang, that shouldn’t hit so hard,’ will wallop you.
This will trick you into thinking you’re weak and can’t handle life. A loser.
Not so my friend.
It’s a signal that you need a nap, need to allow for more sleep at night, need to prioritize and scale back on what you can accomplish in a day, need to take a mental health day or even a leave.
Something’s got to give.
But!
It’s not your self worth.
AIMEE WAI
Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.
Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.
Focusing on what’s rooted in reality has reduced so much of my overthinking time. If a friend is already out of my life, there’s no point dissecting our interactions from back when we were friends. If I already broke up w someone, there’s no point thinking about the could-have-beens because they will never happen. If I’m into someone but it wouldn’t work for whatever reason, then it just doesn’t. Something just is or just isn’t. There’s a lesson to take from everything but I also don’t want to use that as a catch-all excuse of getting into the weeds for something when the weeds have already been cut off and it doesn’t even matter anymore
Sometimes you have to step away to see the whole picture
.
things people don’t talk about enough with cptsd:
feeling like you’re back in traumatic situations when you get triggered/overreacting to perceived threats
not trusting people easily and pushing people away when triggered
increased risk of ending up in abusive/toxic environments
feeling exhausted for long periods of time
physical symptoms like nausea, migraines, body pain
regularly feeling guilty or embarrassed
feeling “different”, “damaged”, or “dirty”
not trusting your own feelings
relapsing after a major trigger
being uncertain of identity
intrusive thoughts of being harmed
experiencing age regression
compulsive masturbation/hypersexuality
attempts to avoid abandonment
over-communicating while feeling scared of true vulnerability
addictive and adrenaline-seeking personality traits
feeling the need to keep things secret or rebel
You will get farther in one week paying close, nonjudgmental attention to the unmet needs underlying your "bad" behavior than you will in a year of punishing yourself and demanding you become a different person. I'm right shut up.