Darkness - Blog Posts
Pic by Johnny Abbate - johnabb.com
www.johnabb.com
Well that would be an interesting smoke trick to see.
Why is it light is thought of as good and dark as evil? As if the shadows sewn to our heels want anything more than to be like us.
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
In Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix we are propelled more into the depths and darkness the war will bring out that we see grow throughout the remainder of the series with Molly’s boggart turning into finding out any and all of them have been killed, the picture of the original Order of the Phoenix (most of whom have been killed) and even with the song sung by the Sorting Hat.
There is also an additional level of maturity brought to the story, because while our three are becoming more into their own, they are learning more about the complexities of life and good verse evil. Previously even those who were evil but were masquerading as good, we saw as still just evil when revealed (Pettigrew, Quirrell, Barty Crouch Jr.); but now we have Fudge, Percy, and Umbridge who are supposed to be the good guys but are doing more harm than one could imagine, forcing Harry and the others to not just fight against Voldemort and the Death Eaters, but also the Ministry acting out of fear and for power. Then, this complexity is heightened as we learn more about the relationship between James and Snape. In this context thou, the inclusion of Fred and George’s growing business and the boring task of OWLS, we are reminded that during our worst crisis’, funny or not, life goes on.
As Harry Potter progressed thru out the years, he went from fighting with his friends, fighting on his own, and in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, we see him progress to the next level; trying to navigate being a leader of more than just him, Hermione and Ron. Unfortunately this isn’t a lesson he masters by the end of this year or book and is given a painful lesson in the consequences of his actions and thinking things thru. But he does make some strides, in one of my favourite moments in the series of the films, is when Voldemort possesses Harry Potter and in return Harry chooses to think about choosing love over hate, choosing his friends, and decency and fights off Voldemort.
"I think perhaps I will always hold a candle for you – even until it burns my hand.
And when the light has long since gone …. I will be there in the darkness holding what remains, quite simply because I cannot let go."
Ranata Suzuki
Fast and Worried
Bouncing and flying
Is this a dream?
Maybe I'm superman just learning to fly
Melt into the speed with no regrets
I live for a little bit of danger
While my legs stick to the seat with sweat
Will this ghetto metal hold up?
Rattle, rattle, creek, creek
Will we crash into a rock or hard place,
And make things worse,
By wedging ourselves further in?
Further in
Could be further out
Dark voices are scary
But not when you join in
My music only goes so loud
I write myself into silliness
It's not worth it
Not at this cost,
Of weightlessness
Soaring through the darkness
In a rough way
Not knowing what’s next
It feels like morning is so far away
But I like the quiet of the night
And how all the sane people are sleeping
i see you in every light
when I only wish for darkness
;; amanecer
de a poco voy cambiando. a paso de tortuga pero voy y eso es lo importante. estoy en calma y me siento segura ¿cómo es eso posible?
estoy tan acostumbrada a estar mal que ahora que estoy empezando a estar bien no sé qué hacer, me encuentro en un mundo desconocido que parece tan normal para todos y no sé cómo unirme así que me detengo y observo. ya no quiero que me lleve la corriente, ya no quiero esconderme en la oscuridad, ya no quiero este vacío. quiero elegir a donde voy y sin dudarlo. quiero querer algo que me haga bien y quiero sentirlo.
quiero ser feliz y creo que acabo de doblar en la dirección correcta. después de años cayendo, después de años tirándome, al fin encontré ayuda. me están pinchando la burbuja y estoy saliendo a la superficie.
están tirando de la soga y todavía no llegué a la salida pero voy en camino, así que espérenme.
espérenme porque recién me estoy despertando.
y tengo miedo de que todo sea una ilusión, de que al despertar me encuentre en una pesadilla peor a la de los sueños porque no hay peor terror que la realidad.
mi realidad.
mi oscuridad.
mi enfermedad.
por primera vez en años tengo un poco de esperanza, así que denme tiempo.
déjenme analizar este nuevo mundo que no conozco. este mundo que me encandila con tantos colores y brillos, hay muchas cosas y me emociona pero no sé si seré capaz.
aprendí a respirar bajo del agua y ahora que salí no puedo más que ahogarme en el mundo real.
es ahora cuando más necesito ayuda, ahora que estoy mejor, ahora que no me quiero ir.
no me quiero ir aunque todavía no haya llegado.
pero tampoco quiero recordar de donde vengo, no quiero volver jamás porque no se si seré capaz de soportarlo de nuevo. ¿7 años son suficientes, o no?
maldita depresión ¿qué quieres de mi? déjame tener energía, déjame tener la vida que me has robado, déjame ser alguien. te lo ruego. aunque sea un rato, solo quiero saber qué se siente sentir algo que no sea agobio.
y maldita ansiedad ¿no te cansas nunca de cansarme? la poca energía que tengo, la desgasto por tu culpa y ya estoy cansada. déjame en paz. quiero saber qué es estar en calma. quiero saber qué es respirar.
quiero saber qué es vivir.
quiero despertar.
;; veneno
Podría describirse como un pozo sin fondo o como un gran vacío que te absorbe por completo, donde sobra la soledad y falta el oxígeno. O podría describirse como un veneno que te va corrompiendo desde el interior, completamente en silencio y en toda su magnitud, para clavar un puñal en tu pecho y no por la espalda, es todo menos cobarde. Además llega de forma inesperada, en cualquier momento y lugar, mientras que uno se deja llevar por la marea que pasó de ser tranquila a ser un tsunami arrasador.
Puede transcurrir mucho tiempo hasta que nos demos cuenta que el vacío nos consumió de tal manera que ya somos parte de el. Es imposible darse cuenta donde empieza y donde termina. Pasar tanto tiempo sintiéndose como nada, eventualmente te transforma en solo eso, alguien más que quedó atascado en aquella nebulosa donde la esperanza y la felicidad no son bienvenidas.
Ahora solo hay recuerdos de quienes eramos antes, abran paso y den la bienvenida a su nuevo yo. Aquel que atravesó la nebulosa, que logró sobrevivir al tsunami o aquel que sigue siendo parte de el pero nadie lo nota, al fin y al cabo todo puede ser causado por una mala noche.
¿Hay algo que una pastilla, una botella o una buena distracción no puedan curar?
Bueno, creo yo que si, absolutamente todo y nada.
Y al fin nos convertimos en lo que más temíamos pero nunca dijimos.
Ahora somos todo y nada, absolutamente nada. ¿Una totalidad de nada o nada de totalidad? En ambos casos, estamos perdidos.
28012018
Lately, it feels like I’m walking through a fog—one that settles in my bones the second I step into work. I’m usually bright. Thoughtful. A little intense. A little weird. The kind of girl who sees too much, feels too much. A Virgo to the core—structured but soft, always trying to make sense of everything. I dream of harmony, of people who treat each other with care. I crave a kind of calm that lets me breathe.
But at work, I feel like shit.
It’s not the job—it’s the atmosphere. I clean. It should be simple, even peaceful. But the energy is heavy. Tense. Paranoid. I feel watched, like every step is judged. Like my silence speaks louder than it should. I thought this place would understand—that I’m in school, that I have a family, that I’m doing my best. But no. When I ask for a day off, I’m treated like I’ve done something wrong. Like my life outside of work is an inconvenience to them.
And I hate who I am there.
I shrink. I doubt myself. I flinch at simple questions like “how are you?” I’m too emotional, too soft, too scared of saying the wrong thing. My voice gets caught in my throat, and I become someone I don’t even recognize—someone who watches from the sidelines, instead of standing up.
But that’s not who I want to be.
I want to be clever. I want to be bold. I want to be the girl who raises her head, lifts her sword, and walks into battle like a storm they never saw coming. I want to be brave enough not to care who hates me. I want to stop trying to make everyone comfortable. I want to stop apologizing for being alive, for taking up space, for needing time, for having a voice.
I want to stand on my own two feet and not shake. I want to look people in the eye and not flinch. I want the strength to let people’s opinions bounce off me like arrows off armor. I want to weld my sword up high—my voice, my truth, my presence—and see them coward at the sight of someone who knows who they are.
I want to be the kind of woman doubt doesn’t dare to approach.
But how do I become her?
Right now, I hide in my mind to survive. I drift. I dream. While I clean, I disappear into other worlds—places where I matter, where I fight dragons and win. Places where my softness is power, not weakness. I imagine sunlight through trees, pages turning, hands that build, voices that lift. I lose myself in stories, music, moments that keep me afloat when reality makes me feel like I’m drowning.
Because the stress here—it's thick, like smoke. It taints people. It steals kindness. And I feel it trying to steal me.
But I won’t let it.
Somewhere in me, I know she exists—the girl with the sword. The girl who doesn’t beg to be heard—she commands it. The girl who isn’t afraid to be seen, even if being seen means being misunderstood. I want to become her. I will become her.
This place may try to bury me, but I’m not soil. I am fire. I am wind. I am something they cannot contain.
cabeza e lú
My gaze is an eclipse
@fiery-hairedsuccubus18
@we-are-fremen
@your-pervert-honey
@alalita
@lilly48
@hecategaya
@divine-cruel-infinity
https://www.instagram.com/p/CZB5AbiLHtv/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Here some other people from the Darkness World. (Tentacules are people ?)
And a bored Axel from school. Everyone would be like that tho...
One of the dragon guy of the project of mine !
Hope you’ll like the dark dragon cat !
