Pro Ans - Blog Posts
il punto è che amo mangiare.
ma odio la sensazione di pienezza, di sazietà, la nausea.
odio il modo in cui trasforma il mio corpo, il suo continuo depositare grasso sulla pancia, sulle gambe, sulle braccia, sulla faccia.
odio il fatto che, per mangiare anche solo una mela, debba sbottonare i pantaloni, perché il mio addome si gonfia così tanto che non ce la faccio a sentire la pressione dei bottoni contro di esso.
odio il fatto che io non possa più vestirmi come una volta, perché non mi va più niente di ciò che mi piace, e perfino la gente attorno a me ha notato che vesto solo di tute e maglie larghe ormai.
odio i sensi di colpa dopo ogni pasto, odio il pentimento che deriva dall'aver mangiato l'ultimo boccone anche quando stavo già per sboccare, odio il fatto che io sia l'unica delle persone che conosco a non avere un bel fisico, soprattutto da nuda, e ciò mi fa vergognare terribilmente poiché sono fidanzata.
odio tutta questa rabbia repressa per me stessa, odio tutti questi dannati chili di troppo.
e un po', talvolta molto più di "un po'", odio me stessa per aver permesso che ciò accadesse, per aver permesso a questo corpo di diventare com'è ora.
13/10/22, ore 02:38.
you can always be thinner, look better.
red hair was in march. green shorts are now :D i feel like i look weird as hell in it because im sort of leaning over but oh well. my legs look nice anyways.
i am st@ving extra all month long to be so skinny for my bday so wish me luck 😔👍
I was like damn. (Still feeling fat) (it didn’t change anything)
Why do people comment on my body? Like bro I know I’m fat I’m trying to change that since I was like 9💀 My dad once told me that my thighs are so big and now I hate them sm and I’m trying to cover them everyday cuz the fat and these scars and just ew ew ewwww😭Btw I relapsed to sh but it’s nothing new actually. I knew that this is gonna happen cuz I’m relapsing every single fucking time. I just wanna die. I’m tired of feeling this way but at the same time I wanna get even worse so everyone can see that I’m really struggling. I can’t be sick when I don’t look sick right? Maybe I’m just pretending and I don’t have ed or I’m not struggling with staying alive. Maybe that’s all a fucking lie for attention (I don’t get any attention btw). I wish I could talk to someone abt it but they’re gonna check me everyday and I don’t want it. I don’t want help. I don’t need help. I just wish someone finally see that I’m struggling really bad and I want people to stop thinking my life is so perfect. I hate every single thing abt myself. I have no friends and nobody actually likes me. Sad but true ig.
STAY SAFE EVERYONE I LOVE YALLLL💋💋💋
i haven posted in ages vbut…i appear once more
my ed never went away but i feel as if I went off my grind and i need to go BACK
I’m lowk addicted to chewing up n spitting my food out and i need to quit that 🙁🙏🙏 pls tell me there’s other chewspitters out there I need…to know there’s others…
4n@s who demonize muscular women, I DO NAWT wanna see it.
YOURE TELLING ME MUSCULAR WOMEN ARENT THE MOST ATTRACTIVE WOMEN ON THIS PLANET.
I’m way too scared to try and get like that now, but if I ever recover I am heading STRAIGHT to the weight rack omg.
Lost 10kg and don't even feel hungry anymore
Doesn't eat > weight stays the same > frustration > binges > drops 2kg
WHAT
Parents: Have you eaten today?
Me: Yes (lying)
Today I had two slices of a carrot.
sustinence
Today's meals
Breakfast: black coffee 2cal
Lunch: Plain shirataki noodles 10cal, a pickle 7cal
Dinner: Sour pickle 7cal
Total: 26 calories.
Steps taken: 862 (Lazy day), burned 37 calories.
Someone said my face looks like a doll, now I just need my body to match.
Girl dinner <3
The feeling of my stomach growling is so much better than feeling full.
Oh to have tiny wrists, thin arms, tiny legs, flat stomach, ribcage sticking out, collarbones showing, skinny fingers <3
Today I had a pickle and some broth
#skinny ✌️🤪
I wish I could take a scalpel and cut it all off
Stepping on the scale over and over again, hoping that the number will somehow go down.
I'm shivering, my head is spinning and I feel tired, food repulses me...
I feel better than ever.
I know I'm in deep shit when a 100 c@lls a day seems too much.
Buying cute clothes that are too small for me just so that I have more motivation.
Tiny legs and big shoes <3
I can't wait until I can lay on my side and my stomach fat won't spill over.
My holy grail: shirataki noodles.
Only 10 calories in 100 grams, fills you up and won't make you fat.
I've let go, I got so busy with life that I forgot what I was striving for. But now I will get back on track, I have more free time now, I will finally look how I used to, weigh what I used to.
CW:80
GW:55
I love how little I have to drink when I ⭐ve myself in order to get drunk, what a money saver
I'm trying to get thin here and the smell of my neighbors making potato pancakes has spread across my room, screw them fr
I saw another girl today with a4a, her body is stunning but 60% of her hair is gone, please don't forget your vitamins and nutritious foods guys 💛✨
Vegetables > rice cakes
If you are scared of fruits, eat them before 12pm, you will get the vitamins and burn off the calories throughout the day.
I care about you 💛✨