Redeemed - Blog Posts
God is the gps of my life, without him I am lost. Without his direction, the enemy will navigate me towards death. Death of my salvation. Death of my purpose. Death of my calling to be Christ like. Don’t forget to plug God into your navigation system. We all make wrong turns. Maybe even some illegal u-turns, but God will be there to reset the route and get you started back on your journey back to YOU. Back to HIM. Back to HOME. 🖤
-Illustratum Paradoxon
I think I’m done trying to be everyone else’s versions of who I am. We all perceive this world differently. I just want to see me from my own lens for once. I’m tired of fitting everyone else’s mold of perfection. What if my way is the right way for me. Your way is the right way for you. Why won’t we embrace our differences too? Let me be. You continue to be you.
-Illustratum Paradoxon
-Illustratum Paradoxon
Aka The Romantic Individualist 🖤
I was just thinking about how people have a hard time believing this stuff. Especially believers. If you believe that Jesus did amazing miracles and died on the cross and then ROSE from the dead. (All super natural things.) How is it hard for them to believe the capabilities of the enemy and the supernatural world in that aspect? They don’t want to accept that there is evil? Are they THAT blind? Also Christianity is always being attacked. Jesus is always being ridiculed. That makes it even MORE real to me. That all the focus is on breaking down the Christian belief and TRYING to take what Jesus did for us to be in vain. We have to understand that the Bible is LITERALLY the living word of God! Like my friend and I were saying today, you can be book smart but still a sheep. Being book smart has NOTHING to do with being spiritually awake. Some people just can’t see past the wool. It’s so sad. Some of our very own loved ones. 😔
-Illustratum Paradoxon
😱
-Illustratum Paradoxon
Me introducing myself like hi I romanticise everything, overthink way too much, live 85% of my life in my head and still can’t believe I’m a Real Person
Sometimes my empathy turns to apathy.
At times my rage is hard to contain.
Why must I feel so intensely.
When I’m sad my world is crumbling.
When I’m mad you’ll feel my wrath.
I’m loving and kind.
I’m mean and moody.
I’m tired guys.
Emotionally.
Mentally.
Physically.
Tired.
-Illustratum Paradoxon
👏🏼 👏🏼 👏🏼
𝙽̷̧̣̣̇̄̆ͪ͜𝙾̷ 0N
“Responsibility is not blame. Responsibility doesn’t mean that you did something “wrong”. It doesn’t mean that you caused something. It means that you can respond *in the present moment* to whatever is happening. It’s response-ability. It’s the ability to respond in the present moment. To say that we are wounded is one thing. To say that we are inevitably stuck that way because of what happened to us a long time ago is to abdicate responsibility, because it means “I’m simply a victim, and I can’t respond in any creative, powerful fashion, to what happened to me.”” -Gabor Maté
"If terrible things have happened to you, you are to have grown wiser. If the worst possible events have befallen you, you should be the wisest of the lot, but instead of going wise, most people become wounded. In a state of conscious response, it is possible to use any life situation, however ugly, as an opportunity for growth. But if you habitually think, I am the way I am because of someone else, you're using life situations merely as an opportunity for self-destruction or stagnation. The most horrific things in life, can be a source of nourishment if you accept, I am responsible for the way I am now. It is possible to transform the greatest adversity into a stepping stone for personal growth. If you take 100% responsibility for the way you are now, a brighter tomorrow is possible. But if you take no responsibility for the present, if you blame your parents, your friend, your husband, your girlfriend, your colleagues for the way you are, you have forsaken your future even before it comes." - Sadhguru
Um. Do I laugh or cry? It’s accurate. 🤷🏻♀️ 😏
Therapist: I believe you said that your childhood experience was satisfactory?
Four: No, you misheard me, I said it was ‘sadness factory’.
Written: 1•30•19
Soul Connected
I was looking for me But I found you While soul searching I found truth That everything was in my head I was so used to past abuse Little did I know How my soul searching Would bring me to you I searched for my soul But my soul searched for yours Soul searching opened so many doors It’s like we vibe better We know we can weather any storm Sex was always amazing But now it’s more than our flesh Our souls make love Why should they get second best So many walls broken through I’m so glad my soul found you In the process of it all We learned the true meaning of This union Has nothing to do with rings, Vows, papers, or the fate of Divorce loomin’
-Illustratum Paradoxon
Illustratum Paradoxon
Written: 6•29•19
Maaaan I’m tired of being left on read There’s so much shit left unsaid I’m tired of forcing relationships It’s like my time ain’t worth shit. Let me not be tired no more Let me be stronger then before. Let me remind you of who I am. Wasted energy trying to show you me mannnn. I’ve become so transparent for you to see But yet it’s like you see right through me. So here goes let me remind you what you’re working with. Let me remind you right quick, have several seats Take your pick. I’m a Bronx native, Yonkers raised Bori-Italia pero I only rep the tribe I was only sent to earth to connect & Vibe Momma-daughter “divorce” Foster care system But despite of it all I would never diss em. It made me who I am A woman who refuses to fall. I most definitely strive to do my all. I got a heart of gold & would do most for many But I stay picky with who I keep near I rather stay a loner Then look for plenty Of fakes, lies and snakes. Mistakes. They rather show you love at wakes. People don’t understand there’s lives at stake. That’s why I don’t have time for fakes.
-Illustratum Paradoxon
Illustratum Paradoxon
Ying & Yang
Illustratum Paradoxon
Today I made a promise. To keep my emotions in check. To watch what I say before I say it. To stop cursing like a sailor. Man that’s a lot to ask from me. BUT when my lack of skills of navigating through my emotions effects the ones I love, then it’s a must. It’s a lot to admit when I’m wrong because I NEVER EVER want to be the reason for someone’s pain. I know all of us are a villain in someone’s story, but as for my family. I will always strive to be the hero. Hey even Hero’s make mistakes I guess. Egos get in the way. Emotions are high. Shi-Stuff Happens. Most importantly I made a promise to STOP absorbing everyone’s feelings. Love them. Care for them. But you can’t save EVERYONE. What I will do is save myself and be the best version of myself to be able to help others and not leave myself on Empty. If I’m empty I can’t give as freely. My resources are limited. So instead of wasting my energy on anger and getting super riled up, I will focus on healing myself to heal others. 🙏🏼 It sounds so easy! But yea...here goes.