Depressing Shit - Blog Posts

Hey guys, I've a question. What do you think about cutting cuz of grades? Does 3 cuts compensate 3 (if we're talking about USA It'll be C)? And does 5 cuts compensate 2 (F if we're talking about USA system)?

Or I shouldn't cut at all? Anyway, I'm gonna do it now...

I'm afraid that I won't pass my exams... In 9 grade, I'll have exams, which will help me to go in 10 grade, but... I have serious issues with maths... I'm afraid that if I won't pass it, I'll go and commit suicide. Somewhere, deep, in my soul, I don't want die cuz of it. But I feel like I will and like I should.

But... Even if I'll commit suicide, people will just forget me, and I'll be just a random kid, that made grave for themselves. I... I have no idea what to do...

World would be better if I'd be dead or aborted

PLEASE HELP ME!!!

I can't keep fighting with it anymore, I can't describe how much I wanna take out my kn!fe and cut my arms. I wanna make too many cut, to make them bl!!dy mess. I can't fight it. I already cut my legs, but it doesn't help. Please. PLEASE. PLEASE!! Someone, please help me. I can't fight this urge, one more hour and I'll turn my arms in a mess. Looks like I have an addiction...

I wish, when I commit suicide someone will write song about me, or become an example why you should give attention to your kid. Even few tribute groups will be enough.

I have Facebook acc, so maybe, one day I'll start livestream where I'll kms... But for now we'll just wait.

I wish, I could just die and don't suffer anymore, fuck my life

I'm feeling useless, maybe I'm just fooling myself, huh?

MY GOODNESS!?!

Seeing my previous posts made me believe the fact that I was into serious depression. My goodness..

Why did I behave like that.. Ebaba.. I feel so sorry for myself..

Whatever happened was for my good.. I really don't wanna discuss about that stuff which happened, and many more stuffs which happened this year, which is the cause of huge depression. The reason I left tumblr was depression. The way in which I was treated by someone unknown, my relatives, family, made me believe that I was worthless and I don't have any sort of ability, potential, capability.

After I left tumblr, I started to focus on myself. Studying and going on small one day trips, small gossip session with friends, going out with friends etc.. I was so into depression that I got into binge eating disorder.

Anyways.. Whatever happened has happened for my good. If those would not have happened from February till December, I would have never realized that I was worthy, capable and had a lot of potential..

approach me slowly and carefully: i think everything in this world is out to get me

and so far that hypothesis has been proven correct

Unfortunately I started self harrrm again and yes I am just getting back into therapy

2500 likes!

Yay, whatever.

IM ACTUALLY TWEAKING

Bro staying clean is fuckin HARD...like i can't relapse😭my parents will definetly know theyr like some damn FBI agents

ughh

i only exist only like i swear im such a npc loser irl

IDK ANYMORE

i have a therapy tomorow...SO EARLY IN THE MORNING THO AAAAAAAA...im kinda happy to see my therapist! but still...i CANT tell her everything...my parents would literally kill me if they discover my Sh Addiction...

SAVE ME

my mom is forcing me to eat...i really dont want to...i feel so disgusting

healthy lifestyle!

I haven't eaten anything today..and now I'm drinking my third coffee...i feel shitty aaaa

Its getting bad

idk anymore i feel so shitty and empty..like a ghost...i just want to sleep and never wake up

im so fuckin useless

Its not even funny anymore,i have no future, everybody fuckin hates me...why am i even here? im so fuckin ugly and disgusting i only make problems...all i do is rot in my bed and think about ki11ing myself...

Im so fuckin pathetic

i just relapsed....fuck i was clean so long but i can't...

I am losing myself

i feel like im not myself anymore..who tf am i? im so damn detached from reality...

WHERE I KEEP MY ANTIDEPRESSANTS

need to stay cute! (⁠づ⁠｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡⁠)⁠づ

i dont know who i am

i dont feel like i have my own personality and identity..i feel empy,Always acting the way others want me to..who tf i am?

....

i dont feel real at all

oh

my online friend just ki11ed himself?...He texted me...i Hope hes okay oh my god...Is it because of me? did i do something Wrong? i fucking can't

I HATE MY DAD SO MUCH FUCK

can he stop talking about how i will do nothing in life? how im useless? that i can't do anything? FUCK HIM

He acts like a fuckin bitch only yelling at us acting like hes some fucking king NO HES JUST A FUCKIN PUSSY NOT A FATHER

OMW TO THERAPYYYYY

Wish me luck...I hope the new psychiatrist will be nice! :33 im dressed all cute ofc! (even tho the eye makeup wont survive..)

I'm going to a new psychiatrist...

im so scared it will end up like always....them yelling at me that its my fault

🤡🤡

i need to start taking my medications again eh i stopped,thinking i dont need it but i feel like shit,but when i take them i feel so damn empy and emotionless..

SOOOOOO

Today the POLICE called my mom... because of school and my absence..We have to go to the police station and explain everything or what?i want to kill my self um....BLABLABLABLEBLEBLEBLUBLUBLU

why the fuck do i still miss that person?

He made me hate myself..I cried every night because of him, I started hurting myself because of him, I wanted to di3 so much but I didn't even have the energy to get out of bed...he manipulated the shit out of me,totally ruined me

why do i still miss him...