The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Blog Posts
Matthew: My life is like a romantic comedy
Matthew: Except there’s no romance. It’s just me laughing at my own jokes
Jem: It took me 28 minutes and a lot of tears, but I can now almost use a computer
Actual friendly reminder that Magnus (and apparently Alec too) reads comics and is probably part of the MCU fandom
Kit: The opposite of Microsoft Office is Macrohard Onfire
The whole institute: STOP
Alec:
Jace: What are you talking about?-
Jace, a second later:
Alec: Hey, you know what?
Kit: What?
Alec: I don’t know, I’m bad at conversation starters
Tessa: You have really pretty eyes
Will, suspiciously: Thank you…?
Tessa: *leans in slowly*
Will: NO! You can’t have them!
Tessa:
Emma, holding Church: If you don’t kiss your cats on their soft little foreheads, what are you even doing?
Alec, looking at Chairman Meow: Yelling at them for trying to eat plastic
Will, singing Welsh songs:
Ragnor:
Ragnor:
Ragnor: do you take any requests?
Will: oh sure!
Ragnor: Please stop
Will: “You are a beautiful and intelligent person of many talents.”
Will: These fortune cookies are incredibly accurate!
Gabriel: Mine just says “wipe your nose”
Jem: William, this is clearly your handwriting
Will: Jem asked me what soup I was drinking and I didn't know what to say because I just poured orange juice into a bowl and drank it with a spoon
Tessa:
Lucie: Ok, you need to start telling me why-
Grace: It’s better if I don’t tell you
Lucie: Better for who? Cause I’m not loving it. Friends, we tell each other things. There’s an exchange of information, leading to intimacy.
Grace:
Lucie: OK. Sometimes, when I’ve run out of toilet paper, I use sliced bread to clean myself. If I run out of that, I use slices of ham. It’s like a poor man’s wet wipe. I’m sharing that with you.
Grace, horrified: I really wish you hadn’t
Jem, on the verge of tears: You bought me a present?
Kit: Oh, I wouldn’t say “bought” exactly… Let's say I obtained.
Jules: he’s ok because he lied
Emma: she’s broken because she believed
Kit: Sbren, sbeve
me reading cob for the first time: mmhm idk if i like these mcs
clary: *slaps jace for the 10%*
me: you had my interest… but you now you have my love little girl
The Shadowhunters Chronicles x Brooklyn 99
Idk why I made this but enjoy ig
Matthew Fairchild:
Matthew Fairchild:
Isabelle lightwood:
Anna Lightwood:
Christopher lightwood:
How do we feel about the fact that Kit and Ty are gonna be the only main tsc protagonists that are actually adults in the clave
George Lovelace was worthy and the Mortal Cup can go fuck itself
Cecily: Will is in trouble again!
Gabriel: Yeah, well, I broke my leg… what did he do?
Cecily: He hit someone with a car. How did you break your leg?
Gabriel: … sOMEoNe hit me with a car
Will, in the background: Lightworm, are you coming or not? I don't care, but I'm going to pay the Silent City a visit now, with or without you.
Thomas: Where do you want to be in five years, Alastair?
Alastair: *under his breath* Hopefully in your bed
Thomas: What was that?
Alastair: I sAid HoPEFULLY DEAD!
Will: I was BORN a winner! I didn’t even need nine months to be born, I came out in seven!
Jem: That’s… that’s not good…
Thomas: What are you doning when you meet someone new?
Alastair: I die
Thomas: ... you can just say hello
Alastair: No, I'm just gonna die
Will: I will do a lot of things but admitting that I’m cold after Gabriel told everyone to bring jackets is not one of those things
Zara: What would you do if I was murdered?
Horace: Cry
Zara: Emma, what about you?
Emma: I’d run from the police.
Zara: Once I asked Siri why I’m single
Zara: Then Siri opened the front camera
Alastair: I could cuddle with you 23/7.
Thomas: Why not 24/7?
Alastair: Mental crisis hour.
wait what simon has 2 siblings-
happy father’s day to julian blackthorn and jem carstairs and will herondale and gideon lightwood and gabriel lightwood and alec lightwood and magnus bane!! ( and maybe to robert lightwood too, bcs he tries )
and also a fuck you to johnny rook, elias carstairs, and valentine morgenstern. they can choke.
Kit: My life has just kinda gone downhill since the day I found out that it wasn’t actually Zac Efron singing in High School Musical
Mark: WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WASN’T ZAC EFRON SINGING?!