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Bpd Feels - Blog Posts

8 months ago

s3xu@al assault really makes you feel like you’re only good for sex and sending nudes and that the only way to make things right with someone is letting them use your body huh hahahshhdbxnd


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2 years ago

it was his birthday yesterday and i didn't reach out. maybe someday i'll be able to wish him a happy birthday without it compromising all my hard work but that day is not today


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2 years ago

nothing hurts more than when you are in love with him & he is with someone else…


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2 years ago

hi loves. i am not feeling so well.

send me some asks or comments?? pls? idk lol…


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2 years ago

bury me with you.

i want to be as close as i can be to you.

forever & always.


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2 years ago

they don’t understand you, my beloved.

but i do.

i want to spend my life devoted to you.


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2 years ago

i am having those thoughts again…

i just want to belong to someone…

any applications??? ❤️


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2 years ago

I’ve grown tired of trying to gain your attention, it’s obvious that you do not reciprocate. I deserve better.


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2 years ago

Trigger Warning

i laid down on the hard sidewalk, staring at the stars while tears filled up in my eyes.

I impulsively messaged a old fp & while he instantly responded with positivity like he always has.

Simultaneously, my current fp messaged me back, responding to my response of his story on insta. 

I don’t even know why I’m crying, sure, maybe it’s because my dad has cancer, my childhood friend/bully died the other day, my uncle is in the hospital after being found unconscious on the floor, we are being kicked out our apartment, and im here weeping over stupid shit like why doesn’t he love me back…


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4 years ago

I easily forgive people. Rather, I would say I don't really hold grudges towards people.

But why, why is it so hard for others to forgive my mistakes. I am human too. I'm learning and trying to improve everyday too. So, why?


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3 weeks ago

“it’s your choice” “you have options” “you know what to do” actually i am very much not well and giving me a ‘choice’ that has no outcome that makes everyone feel good is making me wanna kms!!!


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3 weeks ago

being iced tf out by people who ‘care’ and ‘love me’ and ‘understand me’ even though they don’t care to see that i’m literally at the lowest point of my life!!!

fake ass mfs made a whole separate gc to chat shit about me when i’m currently sitting in my bathroom wondering how many cvts i deserve today


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3 weeks ago

i gave you one end of the string, now all you have to do is hold on and slowly let it unravel.

please, listen to the silent words and watch my eyes.

my life depends on you, love.


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3 weeks ago

all these expectations. fuck you and fuck everyone else.

do what i want!!

no do what i want!!

nah bro what about what i fucking want. i can’t deal with this anymore. every outcome just ends up with me wanting to slice my wrists open, hang myself from the ceiling, jump from a bridge and EVEN THEN none of you would care.

“we didn’t even notice” man stfu i’m clearly losing my fucking mind and HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS.

lord just let this end, please. i’m begging with everything i have. please.


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3 weeks ago

you don't care you don't care you don't care about me. I told you. I told you and you only acknowledge it with a "oh" before changing topics. what's new. nothing's fucking new cause you don't care about me. you'll respond with the same thing if I told you I'll be bleeding out on the bathroom floor tonight.


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3 weeks ago

its in my head that everyone hates me and will ignore me when I'm in an episode because that's what fucking happened today. i was right im always right about this, it always happens and I know it will happen. they will always ignore me. they don't care, they will always choose each other first before me.


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1 month ago

Screaming at the top of my lungs

"I fucking deserve this"

"Baby was it worth it?"

Guess I wasn't worth shit


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3 months ago

current mood is wanting to fucking cry, scream, and rip my skin apart and hair out but actually I'm just sitting doom scrolling or watching youtube letting these feelings sit because you just don't have the will to do any of those things.


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3 months ago

wonder how he'd feel if he knew and saw the extent of my cutting and scars.

he should leave me. i don't want to be cared about. (he doesn't care about me anyways, made that clear)


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3 months ago

want to commit but I got a thing going on tomorrow, so suicide debate is postponed. (I'm upset for no reason and hating on everyone)


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